Think back on your life. Unless you’re a sociopath, you’ve probably felt embarrassed at some point. Now remember all the embarrassing things you’ve seen other people do. We’re all together on this crazy journey of life, fucking up left and right. No one escapes unscathed – just check out these AskReddit posts for proof:
1. “Just hanging”
I was at a water park in the wave pool and a girl had a boob knocked out of her bikini and didn’t notice. A lifeguard blew his whistle, pointed, and said “Your breast…” so I of course looked and saw it. She simply said thank you and covered it back up but I’ll never forget that big boob just hanging and feeling bad for her.
2. Mistaken Identity
This! My cousin once was waiting for her boyfriend to pick her up from some sketchy part of town. Cops rolled up and arrested her because they thought she was a sex worker. She got picked up at the precinct later by her boyfriend and his mom. Hilarious.
3. Drunk and Unashamed
I was in 11th grade and my buddy was in 9th, I brought him to a party with me. He got obnoxiously drunk on Vodka. There were these two 12th grade girls that I really wanted to talk up, he came with me. We are standing in front of them and they were sitting in chairs, so they were eye level with our crotches. Our game is surprisingly working and he is holding it together, or so I thought. One of the girls exclaims “Oh my god, he is pissing!”. I look over and he is peeing his pants as we chat up these senior girls that are eye-level with our junk.
4. “Wow, Dad”
I was in a Disneyland bathroom stall. The man in the adjacent stall was in the midst of a serious poop struggle. While the ambient hum of the bathroom may have drowned out the plop, it did not silence his exclamation:
“Oh my God, that thing is huge.”
This was already loud enough to be uncomfortable for everyone.
Then, a second voice:
5. I’d laugh, long and hard.
We all went out on the town with our boss after a convention. Walking back to the parking lot, a car picks up a pay ticket at the entrance and pulls in. We follow the car in on foot. My boss walks past the ticket machine just as the barricade arm swings down, smashing his face and destroying his glasses. We all get in the car, and as he drives you can hear everyone trying their damnedest to not laugh. He whips around and screams in a pathetic tone “Stop laughing at me!” Then 10min later, he mis-pays a toll booth, and another gate arm comes down. It wrecks the left fender, mirror, and pillar of his truck, as well as snaps off the arm. One of my co-workers grabbed the arm as a souvenir.
6. Every room??
Long time ago my friend (around his early 20s at the time) was dating his sister’s best friend. She ended up breaking up with him. A few of my friends brought him over to my parents place to cheer him up. My friend, who isn’t very emotional at all, got wasted. Proceeded to cry and bawl and chug hard liquor. He then threw up in every room of my house while my family watched and thought he was dying. To this day they still bring it up to me asking if he is ok (it was 10+ years ago).
7. Show me your moves!
My best friend growing up asked this girl he liked for years to homecoming in 9th or 10th grade. She asked him if he knew any sweet dance moves and he said “Ya I know how to break dance” to which she replied “show me!” and she began moving furniture for him. He didn’t know how to break dance, but tried. Her and her friend laughed. Then we left. It was bad.
8. “The meaty slap…of his face”
Drinking with a buddy and we decide to shoot some hoops at a basketball court that was almost always empty at night. Two other guys were there playing 1 on 1, figured whatever we’ll just play HORSE on the other rim. My friend starts blurting out court rules for what I’m discovering will be a serious 2 on 2 game that is about to take place. While he’s us how many 3’s he’s going to drain he tries to crossover dribble while walking forward, steps on the ball right as it hits the ground and absolutely eats dirt. I honestly don’t know how he didn’t knock himself out, because the meaty slap the left half of his face made on the court was sickening. He tried to act like it didn’t happen and we proceed to lose several awkward games. He did not keep his promise on all those 3s.
9. Those seats are pretty shabby
One of my best friends was a large fellow. Easily in the 400s. One time we had tickets to the minor league baseball game. It was National anthem time. As he was about to stand up the chair completely broke into what seemed like 1000 pieces. As It turned out we sat in the wrong row. It was funny to see the person when they arrived at their seat to find it destroyed. Embarrassing. Yes but also a good laugh.