Are you a cis/hetero dude who feels like you’re missing all the signs?

Like maybe there are women out there who are into you, but you might just be oblivious?

Well, it seems like somebody on reddit  was wondering the same, so they posed the question and got plenty of responses.

Of course, this is the Internet, so despite the fact that the OP specifically asks “girls of reddit” to respond, there was a ton of dude-splaining to sort through. Short of exhaustively searching each user-profile, I did my best to weed out all of the guys, and that pretty much left these 18 ladies. Men, listen up.

1. “Like really close…”

Personally, I stand a lot closer. Like, really close.

Also I seek you out more often to talk. Did I come over to ask what you’re doing for the 20th time today? I’ve got a crush.

2. Smiles

I text you back every time on time.

Touch. I need to touch your arm.

Making eye contact from the across the room. A lot.

Smiling. Lots and lots of smiling. Like for no reason.

3. Banjo Kazooie

I found out he got that RARE game bundle on Xbox. I told to him that Banjo and Kazooie was one of my favorite childhood games (my N64 cartridge was also corrupted so I couldn’t play it anymore). So I kept asking to come over after work (and apologize a lot for wanting to hang out) and play it with him, I’d sit right beside him almost very cuddly.

He wasn’t really taking the hint, I think it was because we had been friends since grade 8 so he didn’t really think much of it, but he thought it was weird that I kept asking and then apologizing to hang out so much. One day I asked him if he wanted to go to the amusement park with me because I got free tickets, he said “sure” and thought nothing of it. Later that night I complain that I’m uncomfortable with my sitting position, to which he replies with “Then find something comfortable I guess.” I said “Okay” and landed my head on his shoulder.

That’s when everything clicked in his head.

4. Blushing

As a shy girl I just look at you from across the room real often, if you you back I’ll be blushing like hell, and I’d stutter a lot if you talk to me. I’m a fucking failure when it comes to dating/flirting.

5. The List: I

• She touches her hair when you talk to herShe find excuses to be with you (school project, next to each other at bus)
• She laughs at your jokes
• She tells you emotional stories that happened to her, and only a few people know
• She texts you good morning, and you are the person she texts constantly
• She likes all your stuff on facebook, even that buzzfeed article you shared

6. Sarcasm

If a girl says she wants to come over to do some laundry because her washer and dryer are both broken, and then comes over and ‘forgets’ to bring her laundry basket, it’s because she’s just forgetful. Definitely show her your guinea pig and try to do some calculus with her, so at least something productive can get done.

7. “C’mon!”

If we drag you along to any event or place– we like you.

8. Eyes Wide Shut

Avoiding eye contact cause we are afraid that you will catch us staring at you.

9. Chatter

If we talk to you a lot but don’t really have a lot to say

10. Teasing

I kind of hate that I do this, but if I’m “teasing” you or purposely bickering with you about something silly, I like you. I have a dark and sarcastic sense of humor though, and sadly I think I’ve accidentally made people feel bad for real.

11. Excuses

For me personally, when I’m interested in a guy, I’ll make excuses to touch him. I’ll start with casual touches, on his hand or arm, or if I’m standing next to him maybe I’ll let my boobs brush against him. I’ll stand closer than necessary, or lean toward him if we’re seated. I’ll make eye contact, then look down, and repeat. If we planned to meet, there will be cleavage on display.

Recently I came up with a new strategy, after reading many threads about guys missing “obvious” signs. It’s very simple. I haven’t fully tested it yet, but essentially, I say, “You’re really cute. Want to make out?” I’m considering adding, “I’m interested in you sexually. I’m serious and not just being polite.”

12. The List: II

• If I try to feed you (cook or buy food, like a Subway or pizza).
• If I try to get you to play the video game I like.
• If I speak to you for nothing but a conversation or link you a meme to get a conversation going. You aren’t asked for or to do anything, except maybe hang out with me :}. If a girl speaks to you then almost instantly asks you to drive her somewhere without you (like a party) then she isn’t into you. If she speaks to you then asks if you wanna go see a movie, she may be!
• If I tell you about events I think are cool and totally want to go to.
• If I take an interest in the music/films etc you link to me.
• If I let you get into my personal bubble – this is a hard one to determine. You have to observe a female in her natural habitat (with friends). Does she stand slightly closer to you when talking to you? Does she lean toward you when you sit next to each other? Does she touch you or impede on your personal space unexpectedly? It can be hard to tell with more “touchy feely” people.
• If I’m talking to you way after my bedtime.
• Or you could stop looking for signs and just ask 😀

13. The List: III 

I’m a woman and I’m not going to speak on behalf of all women, but these are true for me:

• If I smile/laugh around you a lot. Just naturally. I have an “easy laugh”, but if I really laugh at a lot of what you say, I like you… a lot. I think for me it’s true in how much I smile around someone, and if my laugh sounds a bit breathy. When I genuinely laugh, I definitely sound like I’m a bit out of breath. I need this one – I need someone whose sense of humour goes well with mine. If we can’t joke with each other or laugh at the same kinds of things, we’re doomed lol.
• If I don’t know you yet, I may not be good at eye contact. Once we’ve spoken and stuff, I will hold eye contact. I’ve had times where I held eye contact with someone before I knew them, but that can be hard for me sometimes before I’ve gotten to talking to someone. Just shyness maybe.
• If I lick my lips/bite my lips or play with my lips at all.
• Texting-wise… my response rate varies. But if I’m sending you a 🙂 or pleasant messages, it means I want to continue talking. If it’s just “cool. good luck” or something, I’m not into it. But I wouldn’t put too much weight into response rate for me at least.
• If I feel comfortable touching you, or you touching me. If I hold your arm or something, that means I wanna see you naked (LOL). +100 pts for me touching your thigh or knee area. That is 100% a “I wanna get with you”. I’m not touchy with people I don’t have that bond with, but when I feel it, I’ll be really touchy.
• I generally dress myself well and all, but if I put an effort to look extra sexy around you, it’s probably because I like you. I’m comfortable in sweats, too, so putting that a dress on = I LIKE YOU.

Etc.

14.  Nerd Love

When she joins your guild and wants to run dungeons with you, even the ones that drop useless things.

15. Wrasslin’

Play fighting & teasing.

16.  Honesty

I mean, I just told my now-boyfriend that I wanted to hang out with him and touched him a lot and told him that he looked nice.

17. Attention

The attention we give you

18. Or… Maybe not…

TIL why some guys think I’m flirting with them. …  🙁

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You rock! Thanks for reading!