Soccer moms, dad bods, PTA meetings, and wine clubs. Just a few ordinary things in the average life of Suburbia. When Reddit users were presented with the task of naming vocab terms for the first ever Suburban dictionary, they did not disappoint.
Check out these 26 terms and maybe leave some of your own in the comments! Now, how do we go about getting this into production?
“ope”, pronounced like “nope”–an exclamation used when two people have accidentally bumped into each other, or one has realized they’re blocking another person from carrying on with their day. Typically followed by an awkward smile/grimace.
The entry for Chardonnay is five pages long because it includes recommendations and recipes.
#3. Soccer Mom
Soccer Mom: This is the ideal mother body, you may not like it, but this is what peak performance looks like.
Uniform includes t-shirts, capris, light colored high waisted jeans, and New Balance walking shoes.
loud shrill voice telling Jason to RUN! RUN JASON! KICK IT! KICK IT NOW RUN!
large tupperware container filled with sliced oranges sitting nearby in the sun
Homeowners Association: Literally Hitler
If you ever have HOA issues (or a crazy HOA lady), walk around the neighbor with a stack of letters for your neighbors to sign saying they are granting you their proxy vote. Get enough votes, go to the next meeting, raise, second, and pass all of your own agenda items, strike down crazy HOA lady’s rules, then the final item is that proxy votes will no longer be valid and a quorum (65%) of the neighborhood must be present to vote and ratify new measures. Bam. Crazy lady is powerless. Live by Roberts rules of order, die by Roberts rules of order.
#5. Online Recipe
online recipe: where you dive into a 1000 word story that starts with your summers as a teen in rural south carolina and somehow ends with a recipe for the most basic apple pie
#6. Christmas Lights
Christmas Lights: A spectator sport with a vague religious connection in which neighbors vie to use the most electricity in the month of December.
Yellow: The proper way of answering the telephone.
#8. Cargo Shorts
Cargo Shorts: A gift from the gods, the vital part of the uniform of the suburban dad