We all have conflicts and fights with our significant others. Some of us more, some of us less, but it happens to everyone.
Luckily for us, a recent study demonstrated that if you and your partner do just one, teeny tiny, little thing differently, it might help you get past all the arguing.
Instead of focusing on the present, try to frame the conflict you’re experiencing with your man or woman in a future-oriented way. For example, ask yourself, “How will I feel about this issue one year from now?”
The study found that this future-oriented technique made people feel more positive about their relationships. One of the study’s authors said, “When romantic partners argue over things like finances, jealousy, or other interpersonal issues, they tend to employ their current feelings as fuel for a heated argument. By envisioning their relationship in the future, people can shift the focus away from their current feelings and mitigate conflicts.”
The researchers found that people who focus on the future tend to think more about their feelings and reasoning strategies. They were more forgiving and blamed their partner less for problems.
So go ahead and use this tactic next time you’re fighting with your boyfriend/girlfriend/husband/wife and see how it works out. Boom! You just got a therapy session for free.