If Jeff Bezos Was Going To Send Everyone The Same Thing From Amazon (Under $1K), What Would You Want?

This is one of those questions that really makes you think, because although it seems like the possibilities are endless, the fact that everyone in the world will be receiving the same thing really complicates things, doesn’t it?

These 17 people think they have it all figured out, though, so here’s what you would be getting from Amazon if they were the ones doing the picking.

17. Thanks, I hate it.

$1,000 dollar prepaid credit cards

Plot twist, only Amazon gift cards are eligible.

16. There’s gotta be something in it for you!

You will all receive a very useful device like some sort of fancy slow cooker. Of course the rubber O-rings will have to be replaced yearly to ensure safety and quality.

I sell the O-rings for only $1 each, so easy to maintain, so cheap!

15. The gift that keeps on giving.

A life-sized cardboard cutout of Danny Devito.

14. You’re allowed to trade on your own intentions.

Whatever it is, I’m buying stock in the manufacturer right before I click buy now.

13. You know we’re going to need that some day.

A ~1000 $ bugout/emergency survival pack. Because while it won’t solve every or even most problems. It contains items that can solve a lot of problems for a lot of people, food for those immediately hungry, ability to make clean drinking water, tools etc.

Plus it is just a good idea to have a bugout bag ready to go in case of emergency

12. But seriously.

An air fryer, that way people can shut up about how “life changing” they are. We’re all equal now!!!

They are like a microwave for things that you want crispy instead of soggy, pretty tight.

11. It’s good to have goals.

PS5, just to drive the price through the floor which will f**k over all the scalpers.

Not digital, really make those gits suffer.

10. Some people really want to save the world.

Rainwater barrels (Edit): As many people are asking what use a rainwater barrel may have in their areas, I would like to say this: Even if a rainwater barrel may not be useful in (insert geographical location), I’d wager that overall, one rainwater barrel per person would have a positive impact.

Water is an essential resource for living that is not very accessible in many areas, particularly those with poor infrastructure or seasonal precipitation. In such an area, to be able to collect rainwater instead of traveling far to get water or to drink water more contaminated than rainwater would be very beneficial.

If unsuitable for drinking relative to the accessible water source of a region, rainwater can still be used for things like watering plants, washing things, showering, etc.

A final point is that if everyone was given one rainwater barrel, I think that most people would become more conscious of their overall water usage.

9. And some people want to watch it burn.

Everyone’s getting a Rick Astley albums inside the cover of another artist. One final Rick roll at the grandest of scale.

8. A lifetime supply, eh?

Since I found this out today for as cheap as $370 dollars you can buy a life time supply of fruit of the loom underwear. So that is what I would do.

Not many things in life you can buy a life time worth.

7. How to temporarily end world hunger.

As many 30-pack boxes of decent Sapporo Ichiban ramen as $1,000 will buy.

Unfortunately everyone now has high blood pressure.

6. Our neighbors (and parents) are thrilled.

You’re all getting a drum set.

Make it an electric drumset hahaha. And a copy of local noise ordinance laws?

5. It’s gotta be worth something. Right?

8.3 years of Prime membership.

I don’t want to give you all anything, but I want you to get it in 2 days.

4. Diabolical. At least write in it!

An empty book I “authored” that costs $999.00

Look at me, I am the captain now.

3. I would enjoy either.

Non-serious: Maid Dresses

Serious: As large as possible instant noodle packs

2. A lifetime of fun.

You’re all getting 10000 small rubber ducks.

I, for one, would be thrilled!

I could have so much fun with a crap load of little rubber duckies!

Should I make a post about it on my local Facebook page first? Or just let the people who are already at my local rec center’s hot tub be surprised by the VERY delightful time they’re going to have?

1. Let’s co-sign this.

Insulin. FLOOD the market and the price will crash like a stone.

I have no idea how I would answer this myself, so I guess I’ll have to think about it.

What about you? Do you have a good answer? If so, drop it on us in the comments!