10. Aren’t Technicalities The Best?
“Not me, but a neighbor.
The couple got divorced and she got the house in the settlement. Only the house and the immediate house lot, not the surrounding land, that went to the husband.
The first thing he did was sell all the lumber off the rest of the land. She went from living in a nice forest to living in a clear cut. He wasn’t done yet! Once the trees were gone he sold off the topsoil, then the gravel under that. By the time he was done her house was on a hill overlooking a barren landscape reminiscent of the lunar surface. This was years ago and the place is still hideous.”
11. That’s One Hell Of A Secret
“I just had lunch with a lawyer friend of mine and he told me this crazy story: when he was an intern there was this divorce case where the woman was demanding child support from her husband. It was in a small city in Bolivia’s highlands and both the husband and wife were shepherds. Anyways, the husband asked the judge for a medical examination of his genitalia, turns out the “husband” was actually a woman.
She was raised by her grandparents and they respected her preferences, for the rest of the community she was a boy. After her grandparents died she inherited the land and after sometime the neighbor offered her to marry his daughter (without knowing the guy was actually a girl). She accepted and once she was married she came to an agreement with her wife: they will be married but they won’t have sex. After a while the wife got a lover and had three kids; the husband took them as his/her own. Some years passed and the relationship really deteriorated so the husband asked for a divorce, things got ugly and she ended up telling the truth in order to avoid paying child support.”
12. WHAT A HORRIBLE EXCUSE FOR A HUMAN BEING
“A man came into the family law firm my friend was working in and says his wife was cheating on him. He’s extremely rich and wants to get divorced. The lawyer proceeds to ask him about his assets and what he wants to keep. He says that she can have the house, the car, the boat, the kids, etc. The lawyer asks him what he wants to keep then, given that he doesn’t seem to want anything.
The man angrily responds – “that bitch only loves her dog. I want her to suffer so I want the court to order that the dog be taken away from her and cremated. She can have 50% of the ashes and I’ll have the other 50%.”
Somehow this prince among men is getting divorced.”