Growing up in poverty has to be very tough on kids.
In addition to going without material things, there are also certain expectations that they had to deal with because of their lack of money.
If you grew up poor, what unwritten social expectations did you have to deal with?
People shared their thoughts on AskReddit.
1. Ugh.
“I once told some friends we had mushrooms growing in our house. I thought it was cool. My mom was angry and told me to never tell anyone again. I realized as I got older why she was angry.
The floor of our house was rotting…thus the mushrooms. But she couldn’t afford to get it fixed. She was worried CPS would take me away for unsafe living conditions.”
2. Private.
“Do not answer the door. Do not answer the phone.
When the man is looking through the window, make sure you can’t be seen.
Do not tell anyone who knocks on the door where the parents work.”
3. Not enough to eat.
“Not eating lunch because it you either “just ate breakfast” or “dinner’s only a few hours away you’ll be fine”.”
4. No extra money.
“We weren’t allowed to do any kind of extra curricular activities.
So, no instruments, no joining any kind of sports or girl scouts or anything that required an upfront investment for uniforms or the season. Walmart shoes.
My dad once said I wasn’t really in need of glasses, that I just wanted to look like all my four eyed friends? lol (spoiler alert, totally needed them)
Off brand everything.”
5. We’re not trash.
“Keep your hair brushed, your clothes clean, and be articulate and polite in all circumstances. We were not going to be “trash” just because we were poor.
Also, no wearing ripped jeans, even if it’s the style. We’re not spending money on new pants that look like old worn out pants.”
6. Hot and sticky.
“A/C was only for company.
I lived in South Florida and didn’t know I could use the air conditioner without having someone over until I moved out of my parents’ home.”
7. Go cheap.
“If someone buys you food at a restaurant order as cheaply as possible even if they tell you order whatever you want.
Used to get glares from my parents if I ordered something 10 bucks or over at a place where average prices was 10 bucks.
If you can get a burger and fries for 8 you better be eating a burger.”
8. Better not get caught.
“Don’t do anything bad or illegal.
But if you do, don’t get caught.
Bail is expensive. Lawyers and court fees are expensive.”
9. Say nothing.
“Never tell your friends that you couldn’t afford food or give them any clue about what it’s like at home.
My mother used to ask me if I told anyone how we live and that’s when I questioned our situation.”
10. The rules.
“Never see a doctor or go to the emergency room unless you are actually d**ng.
And, if you touch the thermostat you will be d**ng.”
11. Don’t waste anything.
“Nothing wasted!
Mom had a dish called mixed-up stew which was basically a little mince beef, mashed potatoes and any leftovers from the fridge.
Good menu planning – she never called it that but one meal led to the next with last’s night leftovers included. Failing that, she always had a soup on the go using bones from chicken, dried barley and, yet again, leftovers.
Thing is they were all delicious, but that could be me just remembering her fondly.”
12. Not worth the bother.
“You never brought the field trip permission slips home because you knew better than to make your mom feel guilty she couldn’t pay the $5-20 fee to let you go.”
What are some more unwritten expectations of growing up poor?
Talk to us in the comments and let us know what you think.
We look forward to hearing from you!
