Remember that comic strip in Mad magazine called “Snappy Answers to Stupid Questions”? What you’re about to read is the opposite of that. These are more in the category of “Stupid Answers to Serious Questions.”
Wow…some people.
Here are some pretty ridiculous responses from AskReddit users.
Let’s take a look.
1. Straight from the Ivy League.
“I was a nanny when I was in college for this very bizarre family who always pretended like I wasn’t there. I was walking down the street with the mother and her two kids. It was February and the sun glare was really bad, so naturally I was wearing sunglasses.
One of the kids, about 4, asked his mother why I was wearing sunglasses in winter, and the mother responds, “Well some people are not that smart and they just want to look cool.” Please note, both parents were professors at an Ivy League college.”
2. The pet store?
“My friend was a second year med student and she was walking through the main floor of our hospital in scrubs. Stopped by a passerby asking for directions, she was asked “hey! where’s the PET-CT?”
She said, “um…I think there’s one in the nearby mall”
The man looked at her confused and was like “the PET-CT is in the mall?”
She replies “ya, like the second floor I think? It’s not called Pet City though, it called pet world, I think”
“Do…do you think I am looking for a pet store?”
Two years of medical education and common sense returned to her in that moment and said “oh my god no you mean the scan! It’s down that hall on the right I’m so sorry”
He shook his head walking away and we heard him say “I wish I was looking for a fucking pet store..””
3. Never went back…
“Was in college, and went to the Calculus study hall to see if I could learn something.
One of the problems was something like “A man throws a ball on the moon at a speed of XXX mph at an angle of YY degrees. How long before the ball comes down”
The response from the TA (PHD candidate in math): “That’s a stupid question- everyone knows there’s no gravity on the moon!”
I never went back.”
4. Call me Dave.
“Back in India, my company had hired a motivational speaker to give a speech at an event. There were 300 odd people with senior people of HR also in audience. Everyone was bored but the lady instructor kept on going on how to build self confidence. Sensing that people are not interested she started getting audience involved. I, being a back bencher as always, did not care about it at all. I thought she would stay in front.
I was feeling sleepy and not paying any attention to it. After some time I saw her coming to the back. She suddenly stopped next to me and asked me “Are you motivated?” I was not sure what was going on. I answered, “No, I am Dave”
Half of the crowd started laughing. She was taken aback by my answer and did not know how to respond to this. She did not come to the back to ask questions after that.”
5. A literal rain check.
“It was actually me who said the dumb reply. This was when I was younger, just by the way.
(Texted to me by a friend) “Can I take a rain-check?”
A few minutes later, I text back,
“Nope, no rain.”
I had literally checked the weather for the day. I was a socially awkward idiot, so… yeah.”
6. The district.
“Full disclosure…I was the idiot in this conversation but in my early twenties, I was at a friend’s small gathering. I was chatting with my friend and some dude I had never met before. Asked where he grew up, and he said “DC” to which I replied “oh I didnt realize people actually lived there.”
I kind of knew it was stupid as it was coming out of my mouth. But I also kind of thought that was a “district” like a financial district and people went there for work but lived just outside of it. Worst part was that even though I was fresh out of college, I was working in a local political office, and these were folks from state legislative offices, so I should have know better. They laughed at me for a while.”
7. That’s really dumb.
“I got a former friend a job at my workplace. She was seriously stressing, talking about how if she doesn’t find a job, her ex might win the custody case, and take the kids, and she wasn’t finding anything. So, I talked to my boss, and got her position doing what I do.
One week later she was supposed to go on her first call*.
She over slept by four hours and ended up missing the job.
I called her as I was leaving to do the job she missed. I asked, “So, are you going to talk to [our boss] and see if he’ll give you another chance?”
She straight up went, “I don’t think so. Oh well, wasn’t meant to be.”
Girl, what?!”
8. What does an engineer do?
“I was on a job and we needed to have a structural engineer to come in and look at one of the floors to make sure it was stable enough. So we asked the owners daughter (who was supposedly a business major who was gonna take over her dad’s company) if she had a contact number for the structural engineer her dad normally dealt with when having his buildings renovated.
She looks at the three of us (me, my assistant superintendent and project manager) and goes “Oh yeah! But he’s busy working on my car at the moment.”
All three of us…..”What?”
Her: “Yeah he’s working on my engine in my car, why do you guys need him? Engineers work on engines not buildings.”
WTF.”
9. The second sun.
“In school a physics teacher had asked one of my fellow students, who was holding a presentation on nuclear energy:
“What is the hadron collider in switzerland used for?”
The response was so outrageously stupid, I was dumbfounded and cannot believe this happened to this day. (She also wasn’t joking. Nobody jokes with this teacher because no one had ever seen him laugh and he was a douche.)
“To create a second sun.””
10. It’s happening everywhere.
“Doctor to Mom : Are you vaccinating your son(About 1 year) according to the chart I gave you?
Mom: Better than that. I am breastfeeding him. This was in India last year. Didn’t know this was happening in India too.”
11. All kinds of wrong.
“In a High School world history class.
Teacher: “Alright everyone, we will be covering the Reformation period. Who knows why Martin Luther was significant?”
Student, blurting out without raising hand: “Martin Luther? Isn’t that the guy who freed all the slaves?”
This one holds a special place for me because it is multiple layers of wrong.”
12. That should work.
“At the start of 2020 , a volcano erupted in Batangas, a province in the Philippines. Affected my hometown which fucking sucked
What does our president suggest doing against the eruption
Give supplies? Help in the evacuation of the people stuck there? Provide relief and support?
No. You want to know the answer? His words not mine: I will urinate on the volcano.
Good job president.”
13. Worth a quarter.
“A middle school music teacher asked the class why it’s called a “quarter note.”
One kid, quite seriously, replied, “Because they’re worth 25-cents each.””
14. Not quite…
“I’m a highschool teacher and I heard this one once:
-What’s sudoku?
-*deadpan serious, very condescending* It’s the highest form of ritualistic Japanese suicide.”
15. A good try.
“My high school had a geography bee where one kid was asked what the capital of France was and he replied “Spain”.”
16. Not the answer you were looking for…
“Me writing a construction bid: “Is the standard flooring for these units going to be tile or vinyl?”
The client: “Yellow.””
Those answers sure made me shake my head a little bit.
What about you? Has this ever happened to you? Of course it has. Everybody has heard something remarkably dumb in their life.
Talk to us in the comments! Let us know when you heard something super stupid!
