If you’ve ever had a newborn baby, you likely remember that while it was a magical time, it was also an insanely stressful period as well. Newborns are extremely needy, we’re still figuring out their cues, and if you also are the person who gave birth to said newborn, your own crashing hormones are a force to be reckoned with – and that’s before you factor in a debilitating lack of sleep.
And if you’ve got older kids still in the toddler stage? Forget about it.
This woman is dealing with all of those things, and she’s doing it totally alone. Her husband is deployed, her family doesn’t live close enough to lend a hand, and it’s clear from just reading her post that she’s at the end of her rope.
My husband is deployed overseas and I have a newborn and my 3 year old niece over here by myself. (I am taking care of her as my older sister is incarcerated). I have no family or friends around here to help me or give me a break. I’m already doing my part and then some.
I’m utterly exhausted and have NO sleep schedule/routine for myself as the kids (especially the newborn) are expectedly demanding. To the point where I feel I’m going to throw up if I don’t get rest when I can.
Recently, though, her husband told a buddy he’s stationed with overseas that OP would be happy to assist his pregnant and mentally fragile wife when she needs a ride somewhere, etc.
My husband met somebody overseas who is stationed at our base. He says his wife lives here, is pregnant, ill (he says mental illness like severe PTSD/anxiety), and cannot drive herself anywhere.
He volunteered me to drive her around to her early AM appointments without asking me first.
He loves helping people. I get it. But that’s where I’m like “what about me?”
She tried to explain to her husband why she couldn’t do it, even going so far as to let him know how close to breaking she was with her current load, but he either doesn’t get it or doesn’t want to listen.
When he called me and told me about it I said “no.” I physically cannot put in the extra work to take care of another human being (especially an adult whom I do not know) and he got upset with me because he already told his mate that I could help them. I can’t.
I genuinely cannot unless they want me to lose what little sanity I have left. I told him this but he doesn’t seem to think that I’m having that hard of a time and could easily help somebody out in need.
I am running on fumes and figured out how to manage with what I have. The extra work could quite literally break me.
He thinks she’s being cruel to someone who needs help, but OP says SHE needs help just as much.
He thinks I’m being extremely insensitive and how would I feel if I needed help but there was nobody there to help me. I told him I needed help myself but he thinks I’m being overdramatic.
The mate is now disappointed and the wife has nobody to bring her to her appointment early in the morning.
AITA?
Who is right? Reddit is weighing in below!
They’re not saying her husband is an a$$hole, but…
Image Credit: Reddit
At the very least, her husband really doesn’t get it.
Image Credit: Reddit
This would definitely be the right answer, partners out there.
Image Credit: Reddit
Here’s one way he could maybe start to understand.
Image Credit: Reddit
She really should have said this.
Image Credit: Reddit
Y’all, I can’t with partners like this. Be supportive of YOUR spouse before offering her services to other people.
What would you have said? Let us hear it in the comments!
