Between the Ted Bundy movie on Netflix and their popular show Mindhunter, it’s clear that people’s fasciation with antisocial personalities isn’t going anywhere anytime soon.
But what would it be like to really grow up with someone like that?
If you’re curious, these 15 siblings of sociopaths is ready to remember the truth.
15. Twisted sister.
My daughter was hit by a drunk driver when she was 12 and nearly died. She was in a coma for two weeks and I was there all day every day, except to go home to shower and change. My sister decided that when I was at the hospital was the perfect time for her and her druggie girlfriend to jimmy the sliding door off the track, break in and steal everything she could find–jewelry, my camera, and yes, my daughter’s piggy bank.
The bitch stole the piggy bank from a comatose kid.
14. I had to cut her off.
When she threw a cup of hot tea at my face because I refused to show her something on the computer. Or the time when she yelled at me for over an hour because I was really sick and had thrown up all over the bathroom sink. The same bathroom she had just cleaned.
I stopped speaking with her over 7 years ago.
13. He’s never had empathy.
My brother was diagnosed with NPD at 16.
He’s never had empathy. Children learn empathy at some point, but it was like he never reached that developmental stage. He was unconcerned when people got hurt. He hit and bullied others in school to get what he wanted. Doctors, therapists, medication… Nothing made a difference, and it’s not like there was some kind of trauma or a reason for his behavior. It’s like he was just born wrong.
When he was 10 he started taking and dealing drugs (as a drug runner for some older teens; you can’t be prosecuted under 14 in Germany). My parents called our version of CPS for help. He got more therapy, some in-patient stays and his own social worker. He stole my dad’s car when he was 12 and got picked up by the cops. He got his first charges at 14: drugs and assault.
My parents were at their wit’s end and agreed to have him placed in a group home for troubled teens for a year. He was kicked out shortly before the year was up. He came home and seemed to recognize in a clinical, detached kind of way, that he couldn’t go on like this without ending up in prison. He was about 15. He started being less violent, but he had insane delusions of grandeur and needed everyone to comply with whatever he wanted. If they didn’t, he lashed out.
My parents still made him go to therapy. He assaulted my dad and choked him because he didn’t want to. My brother was 16, but also 6’3 and about 190 lbs.
My dad died from a sudden aneurysm when he was 16, and he went off the rails completely.
He got a girl pregnant and she was kicked out by her mom. My mom took her in. The girl was not a bad person, just had some issues, so it wasn’t that surprising that she’d date my brother (who could be charming if he situation demanded it). He beat her up at our house a couple months later while she was still pregnant. That was the last straw for my mom: she kicked my brother out. We helped the girl to find an apartment for her and the baby. Unsurprisingly, my mom caved a short while later and let my brother move back in.
He seemed to think he was the head of the household. My parents never married, so my father’s modest possessions went to me and my brother instead of my mom, and that included the car my dad bought a year before he died. It was the first brand new car he ever bought, a small one, but he was proud of it. My brother made my mom sell it so he could get “his” half of the money. It wasn’t even a fucking expensive one, and my mom was devastated to lose my dead dad’s little car.
I was 20 then, my brother was 17. He was verbally abusive and basically tortured my mom mentally. He threatened to hit me on a daily basis whenever I didn’t do something or give him something he wanted. He also threatened to kill me a couple of times.
On a particular bad day he told my mom that he’d have no trouble to get a couple guys to run her off the road when she went out. When the threats got stale, he’d beat me up every couple weeks.
There was one particular instance where I was actually afraid he was going to kill me. He did his usual spiel of using me as a verbal punching bag because he had bad a bad day, and I was just burnt out. Didn’t even react anymore. He hit me a couple of times and choked me. No idea how, but I fought him off, grabbed my phone and ran to the bathroom where I locked myself in before he could get to me again. He was trying to beat down the door while I called the cops.
The cops did nothing. Told me he lived there, so we’d have to get along, and since we both said opposing things, nothing would come of it. I insisted they take my fucking statement.
My mom wasn’t home at the time, but she was a wreck anyway and couldn’t deal anymore. A couple days later, my aunt came to visit for a couple of days. My brother was his charming, manipulative self for her. My aunt tried to pressure me into not pressing charges, since apparently I gave myself the dozens of bruises and contusions I had, as my brother had told her.
I was severely suicidal at that point and gave my mom an ultimatum: me or him. She kicked him out again. He came back a year later, and I moved out for college immediately.
I don’t blame my mom much anymore, rock and a hard place and all that, but she never could understand the fact that her love for her son was misplaced. He didn’t have the things that made someone human. He had no empathy, he was not capable of love, he was just an empty shell that went through life trying to get whatever pleasures he so desired by whatever means necessary.
I haven’t spoken to or seen him in about 7 years, but my mom’s still in contact with him. He went to Spain when the mother of his daughter tried to get child support. Sometimes, my mom still talks about the things he’s done. A couple examples:
For some reason, his ex-girlfriend started letting him see his daughter, and she flies to Spain with my mom once or twice a year. Or used to, anyway. He locked her in the basement with an adult-size portion of food she threw up on because she couldn’t eat anymore. She was 4 (hard to remember) or so. She doesn’t want to go visit him anymore.
He withheld rent from his Spanish landlord for like 6 months. The landlord had terminal cancer and my brother saw it as a waste to give money to a dying man.
He married a girl in Spain and had another kid, and he now makes a living as a realtor. From what I’ve heard, he still thinks he’s God’s gift to mankind.
I don’t think I’d even go to his funeral if he died.
12. My mom hung on his every word.
My brother was one of those grandiose narcissists. A typical example of his everyday behaviour was the time he purchased a can of and uncommon brand of cola and then bragged for days about it as though he had discovered the cure for cancer or something – all because it wasn’t Pepsi or Coke (those were for common people).
My mom would hang on his every word. She pretty much lived vicariously through him, and he could do no wrong in her eyes. He could act like a jerk towards me and she would make excuses for him, no matter how awful it was. However, once when he didn’t like the birthday gift I have him she acted like I had committed a crime.
Our parents were really against drugs. However when my brother decided to grow marijuana in our house our mom was enthusiastically supportive of it. However, a few years later when I smoked pot and my parents found out – well suddenly I was the one who “ruined Christmas for the family”.
My brother was living 3000 km away when she became gravely ill. I phoned him and told him he needed to get out here pronto if he wanted to say goodbye. The best he could manage was to come out a week later. She hung on for that week waiting for him to show up.
When I would visit her at the hospital and say “I’m here mom” she would respond with “I want your brother”. She instructed the hospital staff to not tell me anything, so when I would ask how she was doing I would get a ‘that’s private confidential information ” type of response. Meanwhile, my brother would phone the hospital daily and they would tell him everything about her care – from the medications she was on, her bloodwork levels, her treatment options (it was pretty much palliative by that point), and all that. I could not even get a “she slept well last night” from the nurses but he could tell me her blood oxygen levels from 3000 km away. Every day that I talked to him I would ask him if could not come out sooner. But he could never get away from work, even though he was one of the highest ranking people at his job.
I took care of the house while she was in the hospital. I cleaned up all the diarrhea, did her laundry, took care of the bills….but wasn’t a welcome visitor to her bedside.
When he finally did show up he visited her for a short while, then said “lets go for lunch” to me. She passed away as soon as we stepped out of the hospital. She hung on just to hear him say hello.
11. Poor quality of life.
I haven’t spoke to my brother in 3-4 years. Last time I did he went after my wife and that was the last straw for me. Since then, my parents have cut him off, he lost his job, and his life has spiraled. Not sure what he is up to now but my quality of life has improved with him not in it.
10. A close call.
When I was 10, my mom put a lock on my door because my brother started threatening to kill me and my mom in the night. When I was 14, he fixated on my mom and threatened to burn down our house, shoot my whole family, and steal all the valuables and drive away. That same year, (he was 17), he took our car and ran away from home for two weeks. We ended up calling the police on him. When he came home, the police decided that it would be best if he lived somewhere else so he did. As we were cleaning out his room we found hundreds of knives, a hand gun, lighter fluid, gasoline and lighters.
9. Always a target.
My sister has never been diagnosed with narcissism or a personality disorder other than OCD, but when we were younger she often enjoyed telling people before I met them that I had a “difficult relationship with the truth” so that they wouldn’t want to be around me. I had the reputation of a liar and no friends for most of my preteen years, and she was popular in our homeschool group until she left and got into highschool. After she left, I still didn’t have friends, but neither did she, and she blamed me for it during her frequent temper tantrums. She would throw things, scream, cry, and threaten me with kitchen knives on a pretty regular basis. All of a sudden, the year that I turned 17 and she turned 21, the tantrums stopped and she got engaged. He moved in with us, the tantrums started again, and for once I wasn’t the target. The worst fight they had happened when she caught him looking at a photo of a bikini model, which she considered cheating. She hit him full force with an open palm, and when our mum saw, she threatened to kick her out if she hit him again. They got married, moved out, and divorced within a year of him enlisting in the army.
8. Nothing but drama.
They can make drama out of any situation and will try to drag you into it even years later.
Example: I am the next to youngest. My whole family is a shit show, but when I was planning my wedding, I was still trying to pretend I had a reasonable family. My future husband’s family was like Leave it to Beaver.
So I asked both of my sisters to be bridesmaids. I knew this was a risk, but I hoped they could keep their shit together for a single evening. At the time, I thought they had.
About 8 years later, we were in the same city because one of our brothers was in the hospital due to a bad car accident. We had one hotel room across the street from the hospital so people could go rest when they needed to.
I was in that room with my oldest sister when she said, “You know {middle sister} stole wine glasses from your wedding, right?” I told her I didn’t care.
A couple of hours later, I was in that room with my middle sister. She said, “You know {older sister} stole glasses from your wedding, right?” I also told her I didn’t care.
So here we are, waiting to see if our brother was going to die and both of these bitches are playing reindeer games with me, trying to make me be angry with the other one.
Our brother lived. I’ve cut contact with all my siblings because they are all like this. They have to start shit no matter what the situation or consequences.
7. Constant nightmares.
6. I gave up on him.
My little brother is a narcissistic, sociopath and psychopath.
I come from a culture where the family bond is incredibly important and no matter how bad your family is always forgive them, protect them.and take care of them. For 25 years we lived through fucking hell because of that piece of shit. It really pained me but I gave up on him years ago. My mother however being a Turkish mom forgave him countless times but he only got worse.
I mean I knew something was wrong back when we were still kids but I would still always do my best to be the good brother and role model. I would ALWAYS protect him and simultaneously get the blame for all his mistakes.
My mother was in the hospital giving birth to my oldest sister. We were home alone and he asked me if he could go out and play in front of our house (we have a great park in front of our home and live in a very green area). I gave him permission only for his friend to come back an hour or two later and tell me that my 11 year old piece of shit little bro (I was 13, we might have been a bit younger) was arrested for theft. we were a well off family, he was my mom’s sweetheart. He never needed money or needed to steal he did it just for attention. Just because he was upset our sister might take his place. I had to pick him.up and I remember crying out of shame while this fucking cunt had a smile from ear to ear. He didn’t give a SHIT. Police brought us both home, my parents were back from the hospital with my little sister and the house was filled with friends and acquaintances.
I remember feeling so much shame and embarrassment profusely apologising to my mom. I felt responsible.
As the years past by this became worse and worse and worse and we all basically lived in a constant state of terror and anxiety because of this lousy subhuman piece of shit. I’m too embarrased to share most other stories and I rather just not think about them anymore..we’ve finally cut.him out of our life after 25 years..
Imagine having to hide all your stuff because your house is never safe. Never being able to ask for anything as a teen because if I ask for 5 my little brother has to get 50. Imagine having to worry if you can leave because this little terrorist cunt might threathen your mother and steal her stuff or take her money.
For a while he had a really pretty gf (my mom.hoped this would help him.”notmalize”) and he treated her like she was his property. This one time he was yelling and threatening her, dragging her off thr stairs. I heard the commotion and when I saw it I rushed to them slapped him on the face and put him in a choke hold, told him if I ever heard him behave like that I’d break his legs. This allowed this poor girl to run off and get out of our house with my little brother yelling how he would ‘end her’. He later explained to me how he got angry because she “talked back” and wouldn’t “lend him money” (at this point he spends 1500 euro a night in clubs) When she finally dumped this piece of shit, he called her dad to tell him.”his daughter was a filthy slut” and sent him pictures of her underwear etc.
He then became incredibly depressed not because he loved her. He always talked about breaking up with her and how she bored him etc. But because SHE WAS HIS PROPERTY and how dares she leave him. “He owned her”. He then took my parents new car and smashed it into a wall for attention. Just fast enough that it totaled the car but also slow enough that he came out of the car without a scratch. I mean he had his own car, new BMW that he also got by manipulating my mom. But he didn’t use that, he used my parents car. He claimed his car had no gas. I checked it and it was fucking full..
He then emotionally manipulated my mom about how he was suicidal blaming us for not being more supportive. He used this for months as an excuse for his shitty behavior and intensified daily.
The only person he actually feared was me so i felt this incredible fucking burden on me to try and keep him in check. I couldn’t leave him alone with my mom..I couldn’t move out because I was worried sick he might kill her one day. I tried to talk with him but no amount of talking etc worked. He made a thousand promises thsn came up with some.lame excuse about how 19 years ago I once hit him “so this was all my fault”. I fucking hit him because he was about to smash this kids face in with a fucking rock. Or.how he was once grounded and had to stay in his room for 2 days so he was psychologically scared.
I mean I beat up at least 50 kids for this piece of shit. He’d always intentionally pick a fight with older bigger kids and use my name to get out of trouble..
Anyway I can go on for fucking ever. And these are literally. Just the tame things i mentioned.
My little brother was evil incarnate. It took years to finally break all contact. Because esp my mom always hoped he’d get “better” and she even excused his threats and theft (eventhough he could just ask… he liked stealing our stuff despite the fact that we’d have given it to him if he asked… he’d take money from our pockets, valuables form our rooms, etc. I couldn’t go to the bathroom without locking my door) but we finally no longer have contact. It’s like this burden is liften off by shoulders. I no longer have to worry he’s threatening, stealing or pressuring my mom. Abusing her trust etc etc. The anxiety, and terror we all felt on a daily fucking basis literally ruined our life
He literally made my mother sick. She was the strongest women I knew and this piece of shit destroyed her bit by bit. He ruined over 20 years of my life and I will.never forgive him for what he did. I do no longer consider him my.brother, family or even an acquaintance and in all honestly I won’t even go to his fucking funeral and don’t want him to come to mine.. fuck him.
P.s. this is why I believe some people are born evil. This piece of shit had an incredibly loving and supportive family that gave him all the attention he needed or wanted. But it was never enough it was like absolutely no one except he was real. None of us mattered. He treated his friends, girls etc all thr same way. This was made worse with hoe social and manipulative he was..everyone that met him thought he was great and funny until he took their money etc and one day he just switched and threatened them, spread lies about.them etc etc and did absolutely everything to ruin them. He would NEVER, EVER forgive anything and was so stubborn that he would cut his own arm just so he could get back at someone or get his revenge. Eventhough he was always the wrong party he made up this delusional stories in his head that made him the one that was the victim. I mean my mother once refused to give him money because he had stolen 500 euro from her. He was like 15. So he went into her room and when he couldn’t find money he took a scissor and cut Up ALL her clothes and shoes Then took all the sauces we had at home and squeezed the mayo, ketchup bbq sauce and anything else you can imagine on the clothes he cut, all over her floors and carpet and her bed. Even years later this piece of shit used that as an example of my mom being a “bad mom” or treating him wrong. Saying my little sister got pocket money but she couldn’t spare to give him some money. He blamed her and my mom to my fucking frustration for years like an idiot (I love her but this is the one thing I absolutely resent) apologized to him saying she should have just given him the money. When I hot angry about this and explained to my mom she shouldn’t ever apologize to him because in his head it legitimizes his behavior. She simply says she doesn’t want to cause any drama and problems in the house. She was fucking scared. The problem is the more she did it the worse it got… something she now finally realizes
Fuck man I just keep ranting and I can go on for ever.. I’m going to stop now. Literally made myself depressed thinking back. Anyway… fuck him. We’re all happier than we’ve ever been now that we are rid of this piece of shit.
5. That’s what it was like.
I was playing with a suitcase while watching TV. I was small enough to fit myself in it. My brother, nearly four and a half years older than me, saw what I was doing and asked to zip me up in it. After already having learned to never trust him, I asked Mom to watch us to make sure he didn’t do anything stupid.
He zipped me up inside the suitcase and started carrying it in a shuffle-step.
Thump. Thump. Thump.
I heard the sliding door to the enclosed patio open, Mom started screaming and I could hear her slapping my brother repeatedly. The suitcase fell over onto its side with me still in it.
I managed to pry open the zippers from the inside and got myself out of the suitcase as quickly as possible. Mom was still slapping at my brother, screaming “Why?!
I was two feet away from being dumped inside a suitcase into the family hot tub.
He laughed and said that I would have floated, what’s the big deal?
So, yeah, that’s what it was like growing up with a sociopath.
4. Give me what I want.
Brother believes the world is his oyster and that friends and family and loved ones are his to control and exploit.
He told a girl they are dating and she should buy him a car and take him out for dinner.
Brother has also tried to burn down our childhood home thrice because mom didn’t give him the things he wanted, we were poor and he knew that but he honestly believes that he gets what he wants because that’s how it should be.
He also tried to sell my car, he still hounds me for the money he should have gotten if he sold it.
3. I can’t keep missing work.
It’s interesting really. My mom died recently. When I called my sister to come down the day before she died she said “I thought she was going to die today. I’m not disappointed, but I can’t keep missing work.”
The next day I called her to come to the hospital again as the doctor and I made the decision to take her off the ventilator. On the phone she said “Well, can we pull out the tube as soon as I get there because I have plans tonight.”
She also proceeded to ask me for rent money that day, as I also live with her.
The things they say, and don’t realize how messed up it is is really baffling.
2. She’s a liar.
She called the cops and CPS, repeatedly accusing our step dad of child abuse. It usually lined up with her having rules and punishments. She didn’t like that my parents did research on how to raise a psychopath that doesn’t become a murderer, they suddenly knew all her tricks and tactics. I sometimes think about how sad it must be to be physically incapable of feeling human emotions, but it clearly would only hold her back.
Edit:
Her diagnosis was “emerging antisocial personality disorder” because they said they couldn’t diagnose someone under 25 as a psychopath. Dad acts really really similar so I assume whatever she has, he has that too.
to add some more now that I’m more awake: I lost almost all of my friends. My family,besides my immediate, totally ignore me because me and my mum “protected” my step dad by saying my sister was lying about the abuse. Just to be clear, we were investigated multiple times and cps said they were doing a phenomenal job raising so many kids with so many mental health issues so well. They put down that they were false claims the first 2 times and after that they were like “we just have to investigate to be sure, just do the interviews and get it done. We have to do it every time” which I do appreciate the diligence if a child is really being abused, but we had stuff from therapists and counsellors that were all like “has a history of lying” “tells lies to get what she wants” and my entire family still thinks were protecting a monster.
The real kicker is that our biological father is also a psychopath and actually a child abuser. Guess who she moved in with when my aunt’s refused to let her go back to my mum’s? If you guessed our actually abusive dad, who was now basically giving her psychopath 101 courses just by being near each other, then you’re right! All our family who banded together in a fickle justice brigade about child abuse are now BFFs with the guy who used to threaten to break my legs and choke me and hit me when I was 7 or younger. I’m sure it makes my mom feel great too, knowing that all her sisters took her abusers side after a lengthy divorce battle that he kept coming back with more and more affidavits for and just drained her emotionally and financially for years on end.
I could write a book about how much they’ve all hurt me, by being or enabling a psychopath. I’m pretty certain that at least some of my aunt’s are narcissistic. Last week my grandma went on a tirade about me “not forgiving” but no one has ever apologized or even acklowdged that they did anything wrong. I won’t rugsweep something that still hurts me regularly, and apparently that makes me that problem again.
1. You life isn’t your own.
You feel your life isn’t your own. Every thing will revolve around them. Constantly causing drama and trouble. Sister who would steal from you. Never ending drama. Tried to steal my boyfriend repeatedly. Actually broke into one sisters house and robbed her. Can’t tell the truth ever. Disowned her about ten years ago after her awful treatment of terminally ill mother. Peace since then.
Here’s hoping both of my kids turn out average, in this department.
