Teenager Asks if He’s Wrong for Refusing to Forgive His Dad

It can be hard to forgive someone who has wronged you in a serious way.

And it can be even harder if that person is your father.

This story from Reddit’s “Am I the A**hole?” page is all about family drama between a teenage boy and his father…

Take a look and see what’s going on here.

AITA for refusing to forgive my Dad for breaking our deal?

“When I (17 M) was 8, my parents bought me a piano and signed me up for lessons. I was super excited because I love music.

Over time I kind of became known as the ‘piano guy’ at school. I play at school concerts, accompany the school jazz choir, and play once a week for the residents at a couple of retirement homes in our town.

When I was 15, I started to talk about quitting lessons, and my parents quickly tried to guilt me out of it. I told them I wanted to try other things, and that between piano and studying, I didn’t have much time left for other extra curriculars. My Dad proposed a deal.

If I kept playing and taking lessons until I reached level 10 RCM (Royal Conservatory of Music), and continued to keep my grades up at school, he would buy me a new car of my choice. I jumped at it and we shook hands on the deal.

I should explain that my family is well off financially. I have a very privileged life, but I wouldn’t say I’ve been spoiled. If I ever want a luxury item like a new phone or game console, I have to buy it myself with money I’ve saved from summer and after school jobs.

I should also explain that my Dad’s big on loopholes. When we compete, he always finds a way to win, and when I do it doesn’t count because of some loophole. It drives me nuts, but he thinks it’s hilarious. Whenever I complain about him not playing fair, his answer is always the same: life isn’t fair.

So, because of our deal, I kept up with my lessons. I spent about 1-2 hours a day on piano, while keeping my grades up. Last summer, I took my level 9 RCM exams and passed, fulfilling my part of the deal. II told my Dad I’d chosen the BMW X5 plug-in hybrid SUV.

A couple of months ago, on my birthday, I came downstairs for breakfast, and my Dad told me there was a surprise waiting for me in the garage. I ran out, and sitting in the middle of the floor was a 1/24 scale, toy BMW X5. My Dad burst out laughing and said, “A deal’s a deal, so as promised here is your brand new BMW!”

My heart absolutely broke. I asked if he was being serious, and he said I couldn’t seriously have expected him to buy a 17 year old a real brand new BMW and that we could discuss getting me a reasonably priced used car. I said we had a deal and I fulfilled my end of it, he said he did too since I never said that the car had to be full size and drivable. I said he wasn’t being fair. His response: life isn’t fair.

Ever since this happened, I’ve been distant with my Dad. I honestly feel like he betrayed my trust and that he deliberately made a fool out of me. He keeps bringing up the idea of a used car, but I told him I’m not interested, which I admit is kind of petty.

I have enough money saved that I can buy a cheap used car myself, and I just feel like if I accept one from him now it’s like saying that breaking his promise didn’t matter and that he didn’t do anything wrong.

AITA?”