15 People Hilariously (and Accurately) Re-Write Their State’s Motto

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I live in Missouri, and if I had to do this, I would change the “Show-Me State” to the “Show-Me The Hillbilly State.” It’s perhaps a bit insensitive, but that doesn’t make it any less true — just ask Hollywood!

Luckily for you, the 15 people below are way funnier than me. Just wait and see.

#15. Washington

“Washington state, where we have the progressiveness of Oregon and California with only half of the cringe.”

#14. New Jersey

“Welcome to New Jersey. That’s okay. We don’t want you here either.”

#13. Pennsylvania

“Pennsylvania: The State with More Potholes than People on the Roads.”

#12. Missouri

“Missouri- You think we’re all racist, ignorant meth addicts. But you’re only partially right.”

#11. New York

“New York: Hey, fuck you buddy.”

#10. Indiana

“Indiana: holy fuck that’s alot of corn.”

#9. Florida

“Florida: Stay along the coasts, it’s great, and don’t venture too far inland.”

#8. New Hampshire

“New Hampshire: Live cheap, then die.”

#7. Ohio


Sports or heroin. Your choice.”

#6. Alaska

“Alaska: We constantly need to point out we’re bigger than Texas because we’re overcompensating for our poor financial planning. But it’s beautiful!”

#5. Utah

“Utah: You Can’t Do That Here.”

#4. Arizona

“Arizona: orginal motto is Ditat Deus (God Enriches) but let’s make it more accurate—Deus Arsit (God burns) or Superficie Solis (Surface of the sun)”

#3. California

“California: We don’t think about the rest of you at all.”

#2. Wisconsin

“Wisconsin: Get your old fashioneds and fuck da bears.”

#1. Georgia

“Georgia: we’re not all dumb rednecks


Georgia: only some of us are awful racists.”

Any states you might want to revisit to see if these mottos hold up?