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Anyone who has ever lived in a small town knows that the charm of everyone knowing everyone else wears off pretty quickly – because that also means that everyone else knows your business (and has opinions on it, too).
From the outside, though, the small-town kerfuffles can be pretty funny to hear about – and these 15 dust-ups are downright hilarious (unless you were the people at the center of them I guess).
15. An emotional support pig.
LoL The Mayor has a personal feud with this one guy that has an emotional support pig while living in the village.
Housing farm animals are illegal within the village.
14. She sounds nice.
Some lady that owned a large flea market took 100k+ of covid ” don’t fire your employees” money, fired everyone and is now leaving the country all while thinking the town was lucky to have her.
13. Dogs are gonna dog.
My parents live in a tiny Greek village that has a grand total of three families (including my parents) and currently they’re trying to rectify the fact that our dog killed our neighbor’s chicken.
12. The battle lines are clearly drawn.
The city I live in (around 10k residents or so) doesn’t allow food trucks to operate outside of things like festivals.
There has been a push to change that, and, coincidentally, majority of most vocal people against them are restaurant owners.
11. Of course it’s not a secret.
A woman on the city council constantly spouts about cleaning up the admittedly horrible drug problem in town and goes on sanctimonious rants on social media about it.
Her son is the main dealer in town. He lives in her house. It’s not a secret at all and he gets arrested for shit all the time and she gets him off the hook every time.
10. You can get a ticket for that?
About 2 years ago the mayor of the town I live in got caught with drunk driving his lawnmower down main street at around 2 AM about 6 weeks after being elected.
9. I have questions.
Delilah from the love song request radio show that’s been on for like 30 years lives here and has been trying to convince all the downtown business owners to paint their store fronts pastel.
It’s a real kerfuffle.
8. Wishful thinking.
They just built a new Verizon in town, but someone started a rumor that it was also going to be a Panera Bread.
Someone went as far as to mark it on Google Maps as a Panera, even though the building is clearly a single store with Verizon signage.
7. No good deed goes unpunished.
A woman found a dog and tried to find the owner for a day or two. She then took it to a rescue. Owner of dog post looking for dog and she let him know the rescue.
Owner calls rescue who now will not return dog due to owner negligence. Woman who found dog is now getting s*%t on.
6. Everyone wants a Sonic.
Town of 3,700. Old grocery store was leveled and a gas station is being built. Someone started a rumor it was a Sonic. An announcement was made clarifying the new establishment is not Sonic, it’s just a gas station/mini mart.
The town Facebook group is livid. People are now attacking the town government for the loss of Sonic, even though it was never going to be a Sonic. It must be the tater tots.
There’s also a pig that keeps getting loose and wandering down the state highway. The owner is convinced someone is letting it out but finding a way to avoid the trail cameras he set up.
5. Free Beefalo!
So our controversy has been resolved…But the town I grew up in had a Beefalo (cow Buffalo cross breed) escape from a slaughter house.
It spent months running wild in the wooded areas around town living off whatever it could find to eat.
I had friends who were out for drives sending me pictures of their beefalo encounters like it was Sasquatch. This went on for months.
The story got picked up by a big YouTube channel and went viral.
4. A new low.
Travel baseball. There is a new organization in town that is absolutely bloodsucking money out of parents of 7-12 year olds and they have no clue.
The actual organizations are set up in a city about 20 minutes away, but a lot of the tournaments were taking place at a pair of bars that have playing fields on them.
The tournaments make the bars A LOT of money because of these tournaments and people try to argue that it’s great that the money is staying in the community, though most people don’t realize it’s going into the pockets of two guys that are huge sleeze bags that were the ones to originally bring the travel leagues into town.
3. He just burned it all down.
Our mayor posted a bunch of revenge porn photos of his ex on Reddit. His office and home were raided in August, charges were announced in November, he finally stepped down from office last week after his plea bargain was denied by the judge, and his trial is set for April.
shortly, after his arrest, his current fiance called a DC radio morning show to defend him on air. I’m sure you can imagine all of the drama.
2. Oh my goodness.
They’re still trying to figure out who is Black.
The village has 249 people. On the census everyone reported white except one person who reported biracial or something and now the demographics show that the town is .7% Black.
1. Sheep aren’t landscaping professionals?
Sheep:
Whether or not to continue allowing a flock of sheep to graze on the town green (with a petting area for lambs).
Some think the sheep do a fine job of keeping the grass under control (and fertilized) – others want landscaping professionals to do the job.
Y’all, I would love to know how all of these played out and whether or not people are still angry about it today.
What’s your small town gossip? We want to hear it in the comments!
