17 People Confess the Dumbest Thing They’ve Done When on “Auto Pilot”

There’s always a viral video going around of someone doing something dumb – like recently, the lady who couldn’t figure out which side of the car her gasp pump was on – but I honestly try not to judge those people.

We’ve all been those people, after all, trying to go about our day while our brain is on auto pilot, or just thinking or worrying about something else.

These 17 people are ready to confess the dumbest things they’ve done when not really paying attention, so listen up!

17. Oh now that is tragic.

Not me but one time my gf got handed her drink at Starbucks, said thanks, went over to the bar to get cream or something and immediately dropped her fresh drink straight into the trash can at the bar. Her mother and I just looked at her and started laughing. The barista saw what happened and with a “it happens” attitude agreed to replace the drink. It also helped that no one was in there except us haha.

We still bring it up every now and then and all laugh, my gf included.

16. Sometimes that thing in your head just misfires.

I work at a busy restaurant so I end up saying “corner” hundreds of times a night as I go back and forth around corners and doorways in the kitchen.

Was running food to a table, set it down gently, and in my sweetest customer service voice I said “Corner” while looking the customer right in the eye instead of “here is your soup” or something like I usually do.

They looked confused, my brain tried to reset, and so naturally I said “Thank you” as if that made it better. I ended up just backing away, it was a lost cause

15. My husband finds stuff that belongs in the freezer in our fridge far too often.

I put my dirty plate in the freezer instead of the dishwasher.

14. Ha! That was definitely a weird thing to say.

This is awhile ago. But I was working at McDonald’s and worked in the morning (not a morning person. Still not. My brain wakes up around 10am and I think it was like 8am.)

And I handed this lady her large coffee and the sun shined bright in my eyes and all I said was “Praise the sun” and she looked at me all weird and drove off.

13. I hope it had menthol.

I slathered my face with hair gel this morning

12. Who among us has not made this mistake pre-coffee?

Let a coffee machine run without a jug under it. Went to take a shower and had to clean up the mess afterwards.

11. I’m sure they had a good laugh over it.

I was working fast food and taking orders both inside and for the drive thru. I took someone’s order inside at the counter and told them to pull forward to the 2nd window.

10. The job equivalent of looking for glasses that are on your face.

Lifted my Welding mask up and forgot it was on my head, then went to get a new mask

9. That would have been pretty messy if she hadn’t caught it.

Put a dog biscuit into the washing machine instead of a detergent pod.

I realised before turning it on, so I was able to recover it.

8. Folks, we have a misfire.

Tore open a sugar packet, poured it directly into the trash, tossed the empty paper packet into my coffee.

7. Wow, I’ve never gone that far past before.

Drove 17 miles past my interstate exit before I snapped back to reality

6. …when did that work, though?

I shook my phone to see how full the battery was…

5. They wouldn’t have let you sit there that long if you had.

Waited at a stop sign for 5 minutes thinking it was a red light. I was not on my phone.

I didn’t hold anybody else up luckily.

4. When your mind is just somewhere else.

I was a kitchen employee at Arbys when I was 18.

We used to have sub rolls that were footlong, but the only subs we sold were 6 inch. So you had to cut each roll in half before you used it.

I was just zoned out one day, and I ended up cutting the sub roll in half, putting the knife back in the sub roll bag, and then trying to use the sub roll to cut the next sandwich. My manager saw it and fucking died.

3. I’d venture to say this happens more than you think.

I went inside the gas station, paid, then drove off. Twice. Didn’t even fill up, just drove away.

2. At least no one saw?

I was trying to make some scrambled eggs.

Basic prep: crack the eggs, put the eggs in a bowl, toss the shell.

My dumbass: crack the egg, put egg in the trash.

I literally stood above the trash can with the shell in my hands processing what had just happened for about 30 seconds. I just had the faint feeling of “I fucked up” and was wondering exactly how for way too long.

1. Sleep deprivation is no joke.

My brother ordered nachos at a Mexican restaurant, grabbed a chip and proceed to watch himself dip it into his tea. After about two dips, he came back into reality, shook his head and went “what?”

My mother is an EMT, after a 24 hour shift she came home and tried to unlock the front door with her car keys button and did that for about 5 minutes.

I once drove to work when I was supposed to drop my younger brother off at school, neither of us seemed to notice until we got to my workplace and I had turn around. He was late

I can definitely relate, how about you? One time I pulled out of a gas station with the pump still in my car!

If you want to confess your dumbest moment in the comments, we’re all ears!