Listen, I can be as much of a busybody as the next person. I’m a writer, so listening and observing – even when it’s none of my business – are kind of part of the job description.
That said, most of us eventually learn that you’ve got to be careful when eavesdropping, because sometimes you hear things you end up wishing you hadn’t.
I’ve got to believe that’s exactly how these 17 people felt in the moments they’re describing here.
17. How sweet.
A man at my university said he really hoped I didn’t have a miscarriage, because he was counting on me not coming back after having the baby so my tenured spot would open up.
16. How awful.
“We can’t take mom off of life support! We need her social security check to pay the truck payment.”
– Overheard in a hospital ICU waiting room
15. This hurts my heart.
A mom and her young teenage son on the bus talking about where they were going to go when the bank came to take their house.
14. Hopefully it was the pain meds.
Man, I was visiting my Mom in ICU and I stepped into the hall to answer my phone. I hear a man yelling “just f**king kill me now, how many times do I have ask you f**kers?”
My GF asked what they were yelling about and I said, “oh nothing”.
13. There’s a lot more to that story.
I was in a McDonald’s in Luton and someone on the next table said “it wasn’t until the baby was born that they realised they were brother and sister”
To a toddler at the store:
“Stop crying or I’ll lock you in the closet again!”
11. Probably a good rule of thumb.
“Chitlin’s ain’t good unless they got a little bit a s*%t in ‘em”.
I was 16 and had no idea what chitlins were, but I promised myself I would never eat them.
So far, success.
10. I mean just wow.
My neighbor at my college dorm was on the phone with his girlfriend and said, “you f**king some guy with my baby up in there.”
9. I would have lost it.
I was sitting in a cafe with a friend and the table next to us (3 middle aged ladies) were talking about a party they had been to.
Then my friend and I overhear “then she picked up the cake, rubbed it over her p**sy, and said come and get it boys.”
My friend and I made eye contact, I was trying so hard not to laugh and she just looked down right disturbed.
8. What is the matter with people??
“Grandpa has just 2 more days guys. Are you guys excited for the pay out when he dies? What are you gonna get first?”
It was when I visited the retirement home and the room right next to my grandpas there was rich old man
7. A hard truth.
My mother telling someone that she’d just talked to my father a couple days after I’d been in a serious car wreck. I was unconscious for 2 days. She was telling her friend that he hadn’t called so she called him with an update.
She had asked him why he didn’t call. He said, “You didn’t call, so I figured she wasn’t dead.”
6. Absolutely horrifying.
My mom overheard a nanny telling other nannies that she put a diaper on top of a stove until it heated, then put it on a toddlers face to help them sleep.
That suffocates toddlers so they pass out, so my mom followed the nanny to the house, waited a while and ringed the bell.
The house owner received her, my mom told her the story and the woman broke crying, as she had lost a son previously for “sudden death syndrome”, they had the same nanny.
5. Uncomfortable for all.
I was at a water park and overheard a couple fighting because the woman was insinuating that the man was into his own daughter sexually (the daughter was visiting her dad for the first time in years, she had her own kid with her too.)
The guy told the woman she was reflecting her own insecurities onto him. Don’t know how that situation ended up, hopefully they got that sorted out one way or another.
4. I am literally applauding.
Reminds me of that story, my mother worked at a hospital.
3 people were standing around their dad who was in coma, they were fighting about who got the money after he died. He was apparently not in coma because he heard everything and when he woke up he made sure none of them got a penny after he died.
3. Pretending is probably best.
“You still got that container of cum for the candles”
I was an isle away at a Walmart.
I’m gonna go ahead and believe that whatever container they were talking about didn’t have actual cum in it, but it was instead a funny name they came up with to call some other thing that had a boring name. Yeah, that’s it.
2. Life can be rough, y’all.
In a homeless shelter. between sobs “You do this EVERY time I get pregnant!”
1. I have questions.
Mildly f**ked up and funny “I don’t even want to think what crossed his mind when he saw me in the doorway, with my socks in my ears.”
I mean yikes, right? Soooo glad none of these were mine.
Have you heard something awful you’d like to share? Our comments (and ears!) are always open!