Trending Now
There are jokes that make you think, jokes that require intelligence to understand, and jokes that are actually sort of poignant when you get to the punchline..but these 18 jokes are none of those.
These are the ones that are so stupid you laugh while you’re shaking your head, and laughing at all makes you feel just a little bit dumber.
You’re welcome in advance.
18. I am cackling.
I went to the zoo once. They only had one dog.
It was a Shih Tzu.
17. The joke that keeps going.
How do you keep an idiot busy?
Saw this written on paper money when I was a kid. It had a PTO and the same written on the other side.
16. Terrible, but decent at the same time.
How do you think the unthinkable?
With an itheberg.
15. A lesson for the writers in the house.
How do you build suspense?
……….
The longer you wait the creepier it gets.
14. Miscommunication.
There is a German dispatcher who receives a message from a nearby ship, “we are sinking! I repeat, we are sinking!”
The German dispatcher responds, “Vhat are you sinking about?”
13. You can’t help but snort.
Know what my grandfather said to me, right before he kicked the bucket?
“How far ya think I can kick this bucket?”
12. Word nerds unite.
I was at the funeral of a friend of mine. His wife asked me if I could say a quick word.
I stood at the front , cleared my throat, choked back the tears, and said, ‘Plethora’.
“Thank you,” his wife said as I sat back down. “That means a lot.”
The next man stands up, sniffling, and says “Earth.”
“Thank you,” the widow says. “That means the world.”
Then another guy goes up, says “water hole,” and sits back down.
The widow thanks him and says “I know you meant well”
11. It never gets old.
I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather did.
Not screaming in terror like his passengers….
10. Idk about this one…
Why do divers fall off the boat backwards?
Because if they fell forward they’d still be on the boat.
9. Or an orange parrot.
What’s orange and sounds like a parrot?
A carrot.
8. This one is stellar.
Pirate walks into a bar, bartender says, hey man, you know you have a steering wheel hanging out of your pants?
Pirate says, arr aye matey it’s drivin me nuts…
7. It doesn’t work on everyone.
Tell someone you have a joke and tell them to say knock knock.
They say “Knock knock.”
You say “Who’s there?”
Confusion ensues.
I just tried this on my 13yo brother. Here’s how it went:
“Hey I have knock knock joke but you have to start it”
“Okay. Knock knock”
“Who’s there?”
“Your mom”
“Alrighty”
6. Soooo inappropriate but lol.
A blind man walks into a bar. Then a chair, then a table.
Why did the blind man fall into the well?
He did not see that well.
5. Busted!
Q: Do you know the difference between wallpaper and toilet paper?
A: No, what?
Q: (exasperated gasp) So, you’re the one!
4. That punchline, though.
Three nuns are painting a room. They are struggling to paint the room without ruining their clothes. One suggests that they remove their robes to keep them safe. After some time, there’s a knock at the door, and they freeze. They don’t want to be caught naked.
“Who is it?” calls out one of the nuns.
“Blind man” says a voice.
The nun turns to the others and says “Oh, if he’s blind, he won’t know that we’re naked, so we can let him in and keep painting.”
“Come in!” the nun calls to the man.
The man enters and says “Nice tits! Where do you want the blinds?”
3. A valid excuse.
You know the difference between a pot and a potty?
No
Oh boy, I’m passing up that dinner invitation then, thanks man
2. Just like everyone else…
How does a Jewish man make coffee?
Hebrews it
1. This one is objectively great.
A priest, a pastor, and a rabbit entered a clinic to donate blood. The nurse asked what the rabbit’s blood type was, and the rabbit replied ¨I’m probably a Type O¨.
What does it say about me if I chuckled at most of these?
You know what? Don’t answer that.
