20 People Share Their ‘I Am Surrounded By Idiots’ Stories

Idiots. They’re everywhere. You work with them, you live with them, you’re related to them. Sometimes it’s fun to pretend that we live in a world populated (and run) by brilliant people and that our future looks bright. That fantasy usually doesn’t last long…

These 20 AskReddit users share stories about when they realized the people around them were complete, 100% morons.

1. Dumped!

When my girlfriend got jealous on 9/11 because the Twin Towers were getting more attention than her.

‘So a couple of buildings fell down. What’s the big deal? Everyone is ignoring me today.’ —from my soon-to-be ex-gf at the time.

2. Airplanes?

In my exchange year in the USA.

I came from Germany, and in class we had this thing where I introduce myself and everyone asks their questions about me and my country.

So this one girl raises her hand and seriously asks, ‘Do you have airplanes over there?’

I was completely stunned by this question and had to calmly explain that i actually flew there by plane…but to this day im not entirely sure if she maybe just trolled me, I mean, you cant be THAT uneducated?!

3. Airhead

Someone came into the shop and asked to change out the air in her tires from ‘summer air’ to ‘winter air.’

4. Smoke

In my 7th grade science class there was a debate going on between a good chunk of the class on whether smoke was alive or not.

5. And the thunder rolls…

I tried to explain to my ex-colleagues that thunder is not the result of clouds smashing together. They thought I was stupid. When I asked them to explain why its not always thundering when its cloudy, they both agreed that it only happens when they’re storm clouds.

6. Cataracts

Freshman year of college I’m in a math class and we had some random group project to do. A girl in my group informed us she wouldn’t be at the next meeting as she was going to have eye surgery. I asked her why and she said, ‘I have genital cataracts’ and I said, ‘you mean congenital?’ and she gave me an confused look and everyone backed her up that she really did mean genital and not congenital. Even after I Google it and show everyone the difference between the two words they proceeded to tell me how you can’t believe everything you read on the Internet. I was dumbfounded.

7. Landline

My friend once couldn’t find his iPhone in his house, so he rang it from the landline.

His iPhone rang, on the table in front of him, he picked it up and obviously, there was nobody on the other line.

Screams upstairs to his parents, with a phone in each hand: ‘Who the fuck is ringing me?’

I sat there facepalming.’

8. Dumb American

I met an American woman traveling that got aggressive trying to convince me that blueberry was a flavor and not ‘a real thing’ while obsessively picking out all the little blue/purple ‘round things’ from her blueberry ice cream.

9. Is space real?

I was at a small social at my parents house and mentioned something about the National Space Center in Leicester. A girl pipes up and says,

‘Oh I love taking my son there, he loves it, I just find it amusing because I don’t believe in space.’

I looked at her dumbfounded and asked if she meant she didn’t believe in investing money in space exploration. No, she did not believe in space. She simply did not believe that anything existed above the sky, that pictures and videos were all fake and that all space agencies and anyone who claimed to have been to space was lying.

The other girls in the group started nodding in agreement saying things like, ‘Now that you mention it, I’ve never really seen space.’

I just went home.

10. Fried Chicken

Yearly, a local restaurant offers a meal for the price of $1 for their anniversary. They offer a fried chicken with sides or meatloaf with sides. Decided to go only to find a line stretching around the block. Hop in line, waited an hour and a half before I was pretty close. Employee walks out to say ‘Sorry, we ran out of chicken. We only have meatloaf.’

The shitshow that erupted after that was astounding. One lady in particular I remember for the amazing quote ‘That’s fucking bullshit! Me and my dog have been here for 2 hours and we both wanted chicken!’ Further up, I hear a bigger commotion. Apparently, one guy got upset about there being no chicken, his friend tried to calm him down, someone else in line made a comment, and all-out brawl ensues. Line scatters. Two cops nearby subdue the situation to the best of their ability. Restaurant shuts down for the day. No longer does $1 anniversary special.

That was a nice thing for a while. I miss $1 Fried Chicken day.