8. Shots fired!!
It wasn’t to me but my Niece delivered 8000 pounds of truth on my (half) sister at around 9-10 years old.
For a long time my (half) sister stayed away from our family. She went cold turkey and didn’t talk to us for a number of years for some reason that I don’t care to know.
Regardless, the first time she visited to see ANYONE related to her in years my Niece didn’t want to leave. To which she said to her daughter “Dont worry, we’ll come back.”
My Niece in her most defiant of moments retorted “When? In another 5 Years?”
Yes this is 232, dispatch we have shots fired, I repeat SHOTS FIRED!
Just a heads up to parents: Just because your kid is young doesn’t mean they don’t understand what’s going on around them and they will call you out at times if they know its wrong.
7. Very nice
I went to China to teach at an English summer camp. It was a month long experience, and during that time the children all got to pick American names. These ranged from Tommy to Robot.
One day the kids thought it would be fun to give me a Chinese name. The host teacher mentioned that my real name is very close to the Chinese word for beautiful, so I should take that as my name.
The kids all paused for a minute thinking about it, before one popped up and said, “Not so much beautiful, but still very nice.”
Thanks kid.
6. Priorities
I was sick and on a video call with my cousin. I asked her if she wanted me to take the phone to my mom, the following convo took place:
C: “You can’t take the phone to auntie!!”
YTB: “You don’t want to talk to her?”
C: “You’re sick, you’ll get auntie sick too!”
YTB: “Aww, that’s so sweet… Wait, don’t you care if I’m sick?”
C: “Auntie can drive and buy me candy! You can’t, so I don’t care”
YTB, trying to be dramatic: “What if I get too sick and died?”
C, stone-cold expression: “Don’t care”
Gee, love you too kid.
5. Ice Cold
“I don’t like you……….like reallllllly don’t like you” – said with a intensifying stare and the head of a Frozen figurine being slowly twisted off.
Awaiting the head of said Frozen figurine to be left in my bed any day now.
4. Kid, talk to your parents.
“Are you having a baby or just fat?”
I’m male.
3. Motivational kid speaker
I was sitting in my room and my 7-year-old cousin comes up to me and says, “Don’t you leave your room? Don’t you do anything fun besides sitting on your computer?”
I said “Yes I do,” and tried to make something up.
He said, “It doesn’t look like it, last time I saw you, you were doing the same thing.”
I was stunned and it hurt me inside because truth be told, I don’t have any hobbies besides watching youtube or surfing reddit and barely leave my room let alone my house.
That kid made me contemplate on life.
2. Round and orange
I was handing out candy for Halloween. I don’t like to dress up, but the baby was Pebbles so FINE, I can rock a Fred Flintstone t-shirt while handing out candy. Whatever. It made for a cute photo.
A little girl comes to the door and says how cute the baby is.
“And what are you, a pumpkin!?”
“Haha…no..I’m..Fred…Yeah I’m a pumpkin.”
1. LOOK MOMMY!
Many many years ago in a town far up north in Canada where it was 99.99% white people I’d seen a little girl standing outside a store in the mall look at a black Cabbage Patch kid and then point to the 1 African American who was in the mall and screamed, “LOOK MOMMY! She is brown like the brown Cabbage Patch!”
Loud enough that the lady heard it as well.
The mom looked so embarrassed. It must have been the first time the child seen a different race.
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