24 of the Cleverest Comebacks of All Time

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Every now and again, people say something so stupid you actually can’t believe it came out of their mouths.

Luckily, there are lots of expert wordsmiths out there who can think of clever, witty comebacks at a moment’s notice.

Here are 24 of the best comebacks of all time.

1. Ouch, that’s gotta hurt.

This may just be the best burn ever.

Don’t know about you folks, but I totally get asked to follow people all the time. from MurderedByWords

2. Slow clap for this one.

Don’t make fun of someone else’s job, period.

On a comment thread about UPS and USPS workers from MurderedByWords

3. She’s out here flexin’ alright.

And she thought she wouldn’t get caught!

All Caps abbreviations, too! from MurderedByWords

4. Damn, shut down!

How do you even come back from that?

[Murder] All they wanted was a damn taquito emoji from MurderedByWords

5. Here, she fixed it for you.

Ahh, that’s better.

A better headline from MurderedByWords

6. When atheists attack.

That’s seriously savage.

This is how you murder someone with a sentence. from MurderedByWords

7. Don’t fuck with ‘Harry Potter’ fans.

Or they will shut you down.

I’m a Ravenclaw from MurderedByWords

8. Looks like they taught this student critical thinking.

College = success!

Mmm spicy from MurderedByWords

9. Myth, busted.

Just so, so good.

I think this counts as a murder from MurderedByWords

10. Well, actually, you didn’t take your analogy far enough.

Here, let us help.

Nice Employee[TM] gets called out for the bad metaphor from MurderedByWords

11. Your insult could not be completed as dialed.

Please try again later.

Please try again from MurderedByWords

12. Friends. Who needs ’em?

It’s hard to make friends when you’re a total prick.

This guy wants all the cake. from MurderedByWords

13. That oughta shut her up.

Expert-level burn right here.

In a shower thoughts thread “Telling a man to man up is the equivalent of telling a woman to get back in the kitchen”. from MurderedByWords

14. It’s like looking in a crystal ball.

Maybe he’ll reconsider his approach.

15. The Beatles for the win.

Touche, touche.

Another reason to love the Beatles from clevercomebacks

16. That’s an apt comparison.

Seriously, Boomers, what the heck?

They also have poor swordsman skill from MurderedByWords

17. There are two types of people.

We can’t stop laughing at this one.

Especially clever from clevercomebacks

18. The truth hurts.

Even when you’re a movie star.

So apparently Tarentino is as savage in real life as he is in reel life from MurderedByWords

19. ‘Merica.

This is why we can’t have nice things.

20. Argument = shut down.

Now that’s a great teacher.

Find a different career. from MurderedByWords

21. The hypocrisy.

It’s staring you right in the face.

Christmas isn’t about bragging rights, except when it so clearly is from MurderedByWords

22. We can all learn a thing or two from this movie.

It’s very applicable to real life.

Have we tried selflessness? from clevercomebacks

23. Ooooh burn!

That is so spicy it hurts.

Shine like a diamond from clevercomebacks

24. He already thought of that.

Clearly, you dullard.

Now someone is asking the real questions from clevercomebacks

What’s your favorite burn of all time? Or are there comebacks you wish you’d thought of during the middle of an argument? We’d love to hear from you!

Let us know in the comments!