Confession is good for the soul. It can be really hard to carry a secret around, day in and day out, with no one to talk to about it. Luckily, the Internet provides the perfect anonymous place to spill your guts. Even if no one knows who you are, on Reddit people can still offer advice or consolation. But, in the end, what people really want is just for someone else to know. That’s what makes having a terrible secret easier to bear.

And some of these secrets truly are terrible:

1. “She is a f*cking monster”

My sister is special needs and has PWS. She just stabbed me in the arm with a pen. She is physically 19, but mentally 6. It’s getting to the point that my 60 year old father can’t physically control her. She is verbally/physically abusive. As I type this she is throwing stuff around in her room.

This is the part where I say that despite it all, I love her and she’s brought this family closer. Well, I don’t. And she hasn’t.

If I ever got pregnant and I will most definitely have tests done to detect for congenital abnormalities, if there are any, I won’t hesitate to abort. My mother says I wouldn’t because It’d be my baby and I’d love him/her too much. I’m 25 and have thought about this a lot. She is wrong.

Everyday is a struggle and I’m just suppose to forget that she is a f*cking monster. Yes, I am well aware that she can’t control it. A LOT of people don’t know what Prader Willi Syndrome is. But I can tell you, it sucks.

I don’t even pretend to love her. I avoid her because she is mean.

2. Day Dreams

I like to day dream about myself dying. i often day dream of myself in a horrible situation in which i die, just to imagine what people would do or say about me. would i have this huge group of people mourn my loss of life at a young age? or will no one even think twice about it.

3. “I still miss him”

I dated a boy about 2 years ago right after I’d gotten out of a serious relationship. He was extremely aggressive sexually from the start, and I’m not sure why, it probably had something to do with my complete lack of self worth, I allowed anything to happen with this guy. He made me feel bad about myself, I barely spoke to him during our entire relationship. We dated for about 7 months. He wold push me against walls, throw me into bed, in the street he would take advantage. I would have bruises. He would yell at me if I didn’t do things the way he wanted. He raped me, multiple times. He made me feel incredibly guilty if I wasn’t in the mood at the moment. I was completely broken and still fear him. It eventually ended because I kissed someone else and he found out. I still miss him and would’ve loved to meet him at this “healthier” time of my life. I feel most guilty about that.

4. “I just feel so gross for letting it happen”

Last night my stepdad (mom’s ex who basically still takes care of me, her, my brother, and my mom’s current boyfriend) had to sleep in my room because he had no where else to sleep. He can’t sleep on the recliners downstairs because his back is screwy. My stepdad and I have always been close, we have slept in the same bed when we had to ever since I was little. I wasn’t worried much until I remembered last summer. Last summer I was staying at his house in a different state. We were cuddling in bed and he started to finger me. I was sorta lost in it for a couple minutes and then to get it to stop, I told him I had to go pee. Then I went for a smoke outside and he came out and apologized and said he felt really bad for it. I told him it was okay, but deep down inside me, I felt disgusted with myself and wish it had never happened. (by the way, sorry for not using comas where I probably should, I’m bad about that) He was here this weekend to drive my mom’s current boyfriend to a different state that they are trying to move to where he wants to get a job. They all got really sh*tface drunk yesterday. Now, my “stepdad” drinks all the time, he’s drank ever since he was little, and I’ve never really noticed anything different when he drinks, except he’s really.. horny and touchy with me. We were laying there and he was cuddling me from behind when he started to feel my ass, I tried to ignore it but he stuck his hand down my pants and panties. He fingered me for a while, and he had his other arm underneath me and wrapped around my neck, holding me against him. He moved to go down on me and I told him we should sleep, so we did. He left today with my moms boyfriend and I just feel so gross for letting it happen. Just, so gross and sick feeling, I can barely walk. My knees are weak and my stomach hurts. I want to tell my mom but it’d be so embarrassing and she trusts him. He’s been around since I was little. I’m a teenager now, under 16. I don’t know if giving my exact age matters. But that’s what happened. I had to tell somebody because its eating at me.

5. “Whether or not I felt like going”

I pooped my pants until I was 6 years old. I was potty-trained and fully capable, but thinking back, it always boiled down to whether or not I felt like going. If I didn’t feel like going in the toilet, I would just relax and fill my pants up.

6. Two-Timing

I’ve been dating 2 girls secretly for the past 2 years and I just lost the one I loved more. I met both of these girls while in university. The first girl we actually met online first and then found out we went to the same school. She is a good student: smart, has lots of friends, and fun to be around. We started dating first but I never let it get to serious because I was still getting over a recent breakup.

Meanwhile, I start a new set of classes and meet girl B. shes sexy, cute, and really sweet. she’s into me and starts texting me because we are in the same group and we start hanging out. We begin dating as well and before I know it I’m falling for both of these girls for different reasons.

The first girl I met had a fight one day and it got ugly to the point where we didn’t speak for a couple of months. I spent a lot of time with girl B and fell for her even harder while at the same time missing everything I loved about girl A.

Eventually girl A and I get back together and spend a lot of time together to make up for lost time and because I felt in the wrong for things ending badly that I pretty much let her dominate my time so that she wouldn’t know anything was going on. Girl B, is obviously not liking any of this as she’s seeing me less and less and as I continue to push off things off with her. She dumps me. I lash out, say things that obviously should not be said and instantly regret anything as I have now come to the realization that she’s the girl I love and want to be with but now she won’t even speak to me or hear me out.

7. “What I can’t say to them”

My friends just had a baby with downs. Everyone is supportive and encouraging. I feel like screaming to them, WHY CAN’T YOU SPEND 2 MINUTES BEING SAD FOR YOUR SITUATION?!?!?!

I feel like someone just broke their leg and everyone is saying, “HOORAY, you get a cast for me to sign and cool crutches” and no one is actually mentioning the broken leg.

Cute baby, wonderful people, I want to be supportive but I am telling you what I can’t say to them.

8. Gross…

I am in my late 30’s and I still eat my boogers and sometimes my scabs.I am not sure why I do it, My wife doesn’t know, I’ve done it since I was a kid and never stopped.

9. Physical Abuse

As a child, I chose to be physically abused. I come from a poor family, both parents constantly working and never home. I was young, and my sister and I couldn’t take care of ourselves. I was 6 and my sister 7, and we’d be forced to go to my aunt’s house to be babysat; not always by my aunt. It began when I was 5, and we were visiting my aunt but she had left for work and were left in the hands of my alcoholic uncle. It started with verbal abuse, saying we were a plague on his household, we were horrible kids and every nasty thing you could say to a 5 year old. He was a drunk, I understood why he was always yelling. It started escalating from yelling across the room to in our faces. By the time I turned 6, He was in our faces every time we were left in his care. It took a turn for the physical when he started throwing things at us. After months of screaming, throwing shoes, clothes, toys and different household objects at us, he finally started to take a turn for hitting us with his hand. I knew he would go after my sister, because she was the girl. Every time I heard him scream, I would lock my sister in a closet and tell her to stay until I came and got her. For about 10 months I was subjected to beatings, being burnt with cigarettes up and down my legs, arms, and back; Subjected to being thrown around, and assaulted verbally and physically. Throughout the times I was being assaulted I would lock my sister away, hiding her from him, choosing to keep him distracted with me instead of her. Half the time I would convince her that we were playing a game, and her memories were only of her hiding from a screaming deranged drunk. She never knew what was actually going on. After I turned 7, I had learned how to patch up any wounds I received while being beaten. Spending time reading books and watching instructional videos on first aid and self defense. Teaching myself how to block some of the more powerful hits to stave off more serious injury.

10. “I know what I’m thinking is wrong”

Sometimes, when I’m alone…or when I’m in my room at night. I can picture myself, killing my friends, not just my friends all my “girl” friends all of them. When I shut my eyes I can see their faces, I can here their screams, I can picture every gruesome detail, every monologue in my head…. And it feels good. You know what the funny part is? I think I can get away with it, and I think about it constantly…I want to tell someone but I don’t know who. There are several reasons for why I would want to do something like this…one girl, I will call her rouge, because red is her favorite color, I’ve had a crush on her for the longest time and we’ve been best friends since high school. I’ve asked her out several times before and she never gives me a response instead she ignores me, or changes the subject and ends up going out with some complete jackass that shares nothing in common with her. But you know what she doesn’t have a problem doing? Asking me for rides at 3 a.m when I have to wake up for a 15 hour shift in less than 5 hours, asking me for money, asking me to complete her projects, or to give her a ride to her asshole boyfriends house and doesn’t even so much give me a thank you! And I have explained this to her so many times…what she’s doing to me. How she makes me feel. But she just. Doesnt. Get it. How I would love to torture her and violate her body and take a few pictures…and then there’s Devilyn, because the devils are in the details…shes a f*cking little tease,despite all the things I have done for her she has the nerve to talk behind my back and deny me in front of her friends! But she has absolutely no problem asking me for favors none! I’m sick of it!…I know what I’m thinking is wrong…but I can see it, vividly…and I know it’s not normal.

11. Playing at Work

I hear stories all the time about people sucking or f*cking their bosses to get out of work. I wish I could find one that paid okay, and I could sit around and play on my phone all day, masturbate openly while at work, talk to guys on the phone, then at the end of the day just suck my bosses d*ck and go home.

12. “I can’t stop thinking about her”

I want my best friend’s girlfriend for my own. I’ve known the girlfriend for much longer than I have known the best friend, and we have always clicked. As close to a soulmate as possible. But then we met my best friend, and he’s my best friend because he’s just like me, and I love him like a brother, because he’s the platonic equivalent. But I can’t stop thinking about her, she’s a goddess, think Taylor Swift with a fuller figure. She’s impossibly perfect, i have no doubt that she is as good as humanity has to offer. I want her. But I can’t lose the best friend that I have ever had. I don’t know.

13. Fantasy

I constantly fantasize and masturbate to pictures of my female friends. I don’t know if this is normal or not but It’s been on my chest for a while.

I have folders dedicated to girls I think are hot that I’m friends with.

14. First Time

I lost my virginity to a prostitute… Long story short, it was… pleasant. I was 27 and had never been naked with a woman before, nor had I ever fooled around (even foreplay). I’ll admit simply getting over this hurdle was worth it but I didn’t perform very well (anxiety!). We finished in 30 minutes and spent the next 30 minutes just chatting.

15. “My tiny brain thought it was genuinely facing death”

When I was 5, I went to daycare for the summer and suffered mental abuse from the caretakers there. They would always threaten to cut my head off and put it in a flower-pot. I would get scared and start to cry, so they would threaten me further if I didn’t stop crying.

One afternoon, they were doing their typical bullsh*t towards me, and again I began to bawl my eyes out. The main caretaker who took care of the babies actually called me over to her, set a bucket next to her, and told me to lay on her lap. I did what she said, and she pretended like she was about to cut my head off with a pair of scissors. I was so shocked and afraid that I just stopped crying. My tiny brain thought it was genuinely facing death.

After only a minute or so of nothing happening, I think the caretaker knew she went too far, and tried to comfort me. I just sat there on her lap, kind of staring off. She let me down, and I just went to a desk and sat there. I kept thinking in my head what I’d done so wrong to be almost put to death.

A week or so later, I was taken out of that center and put in a much nicer one because apparently the workers at the old one were known for f*cking around with the kids.

16. “Think fast!”

We were both taking a bath one evening. I was scrubbing myself, minding my own business, when my brother stood up and said “think fast!”

I looked up with my mouth kind of open, and I was greeted with a piss stream going straight in my mouth. I jerked my head back and started spitting and coughing, while he just stood there and laughed at me.

17. Attempted Murder

Once when I was about 4 years old I straight up tried to murder my 2 year old brother with a pillow. Almost succeeded too.

18. Just finish it, dude

I find my gf a bit attractive, but not overly so. I don’t particularly like her personality since she acts like a ten year old but I am her first bf and do not want to hurt her by ending it so I act like the best boyfriend ever. Meanwhile I ignore her texts by saying my phone is broken and spend 8 hours a day talking to her best friend, who I think I love. I don’t have the heart to end what I have and I don’t have a chance with the friend because I am helping her get with another guy she likes. I feel like the only reason I am dating this girl is because a mutual friend found out she liked me and talked me up as if I was dying over her and loved her like crazy. I am stuck in a spot I don’t want to be in and I hate how I got here, so I come to you guys to confess how I really am and how depressed this is all making me. Sorry if this doesn’t count truly as a confession, but I really needed to put this somewhere.

 

19. Fear of Mislabelling 

I’m scared of being labelled a child molester/pedophile. You hear every so often about people being falsely accused of doing things to a child, and the possibility of that scares the sh*te out of me. For the record, I’ve never touched one, never want to, never WILL.

20. Whoa…

Today, I got asked to by a homeless person to kill him. Now I feel like I’m in a funk, and have really confused/ disturbed feelings.

21. …is that the reason?

I sleep with my hand in my buttcrack a lot of the time. It’s comfortable.

22. SBD

On a crowded morning subway commute…the beans I ate for dinner caught up with me and I let loose a lethal fart. It was like a gaseous wasabi cloud hit the D train. Sorry folks but if I didnt do it, I would’ve exploded.

23. “I regret nothing”

I had sex with two Bangkok hookers, without a condom. I came inside one of them while the other was sucking my balls. This was the greatest sexual experience of my life, and I regret nothing.

24. Housing…situation

I’m an 18 year old student. Freshman year I lived in the dorms, and this year I’m living off campus. I’m renting an extra room in some woman’s house. It’s a great location – super safe and a 10 minute bike ride to campus. I get my own bathroom and there’s also a pool/hot tub and billiards table.

The woman I’m renting from is like mid 30s. Her husband died a few years ago, so she wanted to rent out a room to help pay the bills. She also has a 13 year old daughter. She wanted someone quiet, would just mind their own business/wouldn’t get in the way, etc. And I was perfect. I basically went, “Yeah, I’m a student, but I’m an engineering student, so I don’t have a life. The only time you’ll see me is when I’m coming/going or in the kitchen.”

She and I started sleeping together. Then at the end of last semester, my cousin bought a house here and offered to let me stay there for free. I told her that I was grateful for everything, but that I’d be moving out.

She offered to let me stay there for free. I think it’s probably because she wants to get laid. I mean, she’s smoking hot so she probably could go out to any bar and bring home a guy, but that might not set the best example for her daughter and she’s really socially awkward.

25. …Dude, self-control

I just went out drinking with my wife and a house guest. We all drank a lot, but apparently I am the only horny one. I started looking at porn on my phone and the next thing I knew I was jerking off in the bathroom which sits dead center of my 600 square foot apartment. They both seem knocked out though, so that’s good I guess 😉

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