9. Dementia Confession

“My mom and I cared for her father as he deteriorated with old age. As his mind went he told stories from the war, from his youth, and about my grandmother’s first husband.

My grandpa had a crush on her before WWII but never acted on it because he was dirt poor. He lied about his age and joined the Navy when he was somewhere between 14 and 16 so he could be respectable. So he could be worthy of her.

While he was away she married a man her parents liked. Her first husband beat her badly, would get drunk and assault her then call her mean names and make her sleep in the barn. She stayed because divorce wasn’t something you did at the time.

My grandpa got back, all snazzy in his uniform, and was told she’d married and where she lived. He showed up to say hello and there she was, a bloody mess. He took her to the Doctor, got her cleaned up, and convinced her to divorce him.

A year later they were married. Her ex kept showing up to harass them.

The story we’d always been told is that her ex finally got the hint and moved away.

The story my grandpa told me, in a lucid moment, was basically this:

‘I hated him for what he’d done to her. I knew he’d never leave her alone. I made sure he’d never bother her or any other woman again.’

I think my grandpa confessed to killing his wife’s ex husband.

What you have to keep in mind is that this was a very rural part of the Midwest in the 40s.”