20 Hilarious Vet Clinic Signs That Were Definitely Written By A Pet Owner

Throughout history, catching people’s attention has been one of the toughest hurdles for any business. With competition all around, companies need creative ways to stand out and attract customers.

That’s why you’ll find everything from barbecue spots to churches to veterinary clinics using clever, witty, or playful messages on their outdoor signs. As this photo collection reveals, vet clinics often excel at striking just the right balance of humor.

That cat’s owner will swear it loves them, though

Many who aren’t fans of cats assume they’re distant and indifferent to their owners. Yet countless cat enthusiasts proudly share stories of their loving felines that prove otherwise. Still, the ways cats show affection can sometimes leave us puzzled.

The most logical guess is that the cat simply doesn’t realize how cautious humans need to be on stairs and just chose an awkward moment to follow us. But when it happens again and again, it’s hard not to wonder if they’ve caught on to those stories about wealthy people leaving their fortunes to their cats.

Some clinics put just as much care into the sign in the back

While many vets hope their front-door signs will charm potential new clients, this clinic aims to delight their current patients instead. That’s why the staff placed this playful sign in the parking lot.

Though the sign’s main purpose is to explain how the system works, the use of “sit” and “stay” commands shows the vet had some fun with it. Honestly, the scattered cat butts are probably the clearest sign of that playful spirit.

This clinic’s got a million of them

There’s a clear pattern in many of this vet clinic’s signs, making a strong case for why it’s probably a good thing pets can’t read. It’s already tough enough convincing them to come in for a visit without making them think they’re going to be neutered every single time.

Sure, neutering might calm them down (pun intended), but warning them about it tends to have the opposite effect. And as for the cat? They’ll just claim they can quit the catnip anytime they want.

These are words to live by

While it’s a bummer to learn the five-second rule is mostly a myth, dog owners probably suspected as much long before science confirmed it. After all, it’s tough to measure how much bacteria clings to dropped food when your dog snatches it up before you even get a chance.

Honestly, that might be the only research scenario where a scientist could seriously claim “my dog ate my homework” in front of a grant committee—and not get laughed out of the room. But seriously, has anyone ever actually gotten away with that excuse?

That would at least provide an explanation

Sometimes it’s obvious what a dog is barking at, but other times it’s almost impossible not to picture another dog shouting “jerk” from a mile away—and that insult somehow carried on the breeze. This is especially true if it’s a feisty breed like a Chihuahua.

While we’d like to believe our dogs aren’t barking at thin air, the reality is that whatever’s got them riled up is usually far enough away that their barking might as well be an Amber Alert.

As long as it’s not flooding or burning anything, it’s fine

For cat owners, the real noise to worry about at night isn’t the crashing or bumping sounds. If the cats knocked something over, there’s not much you can do about it anyway. The sound that really sends a chill down your spine is that high-pitched retching noise they make when their stomach isn’t agreeing with them.

Unless your cat is secretly trying to remake Home Alone, whatever they broke probably won’t be much of a hazard. But the nasty little “land mine” they leave behind after all that retching? That could be lurking anywhere, just waiting for an unsuspecting foot.

Now, that’s a tradition everyone can get behind

This vet clinic isn’t the only one to use this pun, but by linking it to a specific event, the joke becomes much clearer. On other signs, someone not paying close attention might take it as a simple request and completely miss the humor.

But during Mardi Gras, it’s obvious there’s more going on than just showcasing adorable grumpy cats. With all the noise, music, and chaos, those poor cats are likely just trying to survive—while still sneaking in their much-needed 12 hours of sleep.

Somebody must have felt very clever that day

Shih Tzus have always been popular subjects for playful puns, but this fresh take stands out—especially considering how rare truly original ideas have become.

The slogan makes a confident promise, though it’s easy to imagine dissatisfied customers flipping the pun to express their complaints. A clear sign would be if numerous negative reviews mention bulldog-Shih Tzu mixes with an unusually pun-heavy tone.

That’s life in a nutshell

For some people, tape tends to cling more to their fingers than to the surface they’re trying to stick it on. Dog hair behaves in much the same way. It’s most helpful when it stays on the dog—but often, it seems to have a mind of its own.

No matter how close owners are to their dogs, the fur seems determined to attach itself to absolutely everything else. And much like cats, it often shows the strongest attraction to those who are allergic to it.

Why is that the only thing that kills their appetite?

While both humans and animals often get nervous about visiting the doctor, most people can at least admit they’ll take their medicine. Dogs, on the other hand, seem absolutely sure that any pill they’re given is some kind of hidden poison sneaked into their food.

And who do you think they blame for this? Judging by how fiercely this dog reacts to the visitor, it’s probably a postal worker. Unfortunately, if they ever found out the truth, they wouldn’t be able to call their owner a donkey the way Ramsay does.

Now, there’s a message someone will actually appreciate

When someone tells you that another person says hi, it’s usually just a brief acknowledgment before the conversation shifts—unless it’s been ages since you last saw that person, then maybe it sparks more talk.

But cats are a whole different story. They might not care who actually said “pspspsps,” but as long as someone did, they’re just happy to hear it. It’s tough not to wish we had that kind of pure excitement. And if you thought cats were brutally honest when they dislike someone, this just adds to their charm.

Has there ever been a pet that enjoyed the cone?

It’s rare to find a pet that isn’t curious. No matter where they go, the chances are good that they’re going to stick their faces into as many things as they can find. Although most people wouldn’t be crazy enough to go anywhere near some of that stuff, that’s not really how cats and dogs think.

So naturally, one of those mysterious discoveries is going to make them sick. Sadly, understanding that it sucks to wear the cone isn’t quite the same as learning to avoid the activities that force them to wear one. The pet owner’s struggle.

That’s one argument for getting a pet their shots

They’re not wrong—dinosaurs never received any vaccines. Luckily for humans, that’s probably a good thing. But when it comes to our cherished pets, folks definitely expect better protection than what they’d hope for against creatures that could stomp or devour them.

Sure, no vaccine could have helped against a sudden meteor strike. Still, since there are several theories about what caused the dinosaurs’ extinction, being prepared is always wise.

Well, it’s not any more provocative than the original lyrics

It’s tough to believe even Lil Jon foresaw how his song would still have people joyfully shouting about sweaty testicles more than 20 years later—but the animals probably aren’t as thrilled by their own take on it. Honestly, that’s not exactly anyone’s idea of a good time.

While the idea might bring relief to pet owners wanting to avoid surprise puppies, “three six one, damn they’re gone” just doesn’t have the same catchy vibe. Plus, getting crunk definitely isn’t great for dogs—it’s kind of like chocolate in that way.

Dogs are so lovable but they may not be if they were human

Dogs are easy to adore with their endless energy, loving nature, and undeniable charm. But this vet clinic’s sign serves as a funny reminder: if dogs had human abilities, our feelings toward them might change.

Imagine if a person wouldn’t stop calling you—pretty annoying, right? Well, dogs do the same thing, and it’s hard to blame them. Plus, most people wouldn’t feel any more at ease if that person started panting or barking nonstop. Maybe it’s best to appreciate dogs just the way they are.

Of course, the bladder will soon take notice

There’s probably no better way to test how much someone loves their cat than seeing how their plans change when that little furball falls asleep on their lap. If their first instinct is to freeze and stay perfectly still, chances are that cat is living in a pretty great home.

Of course, everyone has their limits. People might be willing to endure boredom just to let their cat keep snoozing peacefully—but that doesn’t mean they should sacrifice basic needs to do it. The cat will understand… eventually.

Just a little joke

Some vet signs are clever reminders to spay and neuter pets, while others are just a fun way to let people know the clinic’s open. But if you drive past them often enough, you’ll realize most of them are really just excuses for some good old-fashioned corny jokes.

This one definitely falls into that category—but it’s a little sharper than most. And honestly, it’s hard to argue with the logic. It’s probably exactly how that saying got started in the first place.

Well, at least nobody has time to get their hopes up

Sometimes, it can be a little hard to tell whether a sign was put up as a joke or as a response to a genuine incident. And this vet sign noting that only the little patients being brought into the clinic are eligible for free belly rubs is a pretty good example.

On the one hand, it’s a sweet way to tell people that the vets are as affectionate with people’s pets as they are. On the other hand, it’s really not hard to picture someone with the audacity to lift their shirt and look at the vet expectantly.

The dog probably wouldn’t even question it

One thing that’s great about dogs is that as long as their friends are happy and they’re getting a lot of love and affection, it doesn’t really matter what’s going on. “Excited but unsure of what’s going on” is practically the default mood for some of them.

So, if we were to make like Patrick Swayze and majestically lift our dogs in the air, it might startle them a little. However, it wouldn’t be long before that big, dopey smile came back and they’d agree that nobody puts a fur baby in the corner.

Now that’s a fertile philosophical discussion

It sounds like the subject of one of those intense but ultimately pointless 1 am discussions, but one clinic boldly asked the world what dogs call their owners. Do they seem them as the parental figures that some people try to be? Do they have a concept of private ownership?

However, it may not matter that much whether they call people mommy, master, friend, or feed servant. The point is that they like us. Finding out what level they like us on may shatter illusions we’re not ready for.