Man Asks if He’s Wrong for Telling His Girlfriend Not to Join the Same Gym as Him

Have you ever belonged to a gym with your significant other?

If so, how did it go?

I can see that situation either being really convenient…or really annoying.

So is this guy out of line for what he said to his girlfriend?

Let’s take a look at his story…

AITA for telling my partner not to join the same gym as me?

“My girlfriend (29F) and I (33M) just moved to NYC.

We’re coming from Colorado where we first began cohabitating together and now carrying that on in The Big Apple. We have a little less space now but I don’t think that bothers either of us too much. Even despite this move, my gf and I have always been open and transparent when it comes to having our own individual lives away from each other.

We love each other very much but we understand that having a healthy relationship can often act as a byproduct to having a healthy individual state of mind. While we prioritize spending time together, we also hold doing things individually with high importance.

So now that we’re in NYC, we both needed gym memberships. In our search I found a gym that I felt confidently would meet all my needs. I was pretty sure it was the perfect fit. She was simultaneously doing her own search but for whatever reason didn’t come across the gym that I had found and was generally underwhelmed with what she had found.

She wasn’t that excited about any of them. She wanted me to tell her about the one that I had found so she could consider joining herself. So I told her the name, she looked it up, and was very interested. It checked all her boxes as well. I told her that I’d prefer to keep the gym as separate activities — a space we could each have for ourselves.

Or in other words — don’t join the same gym I’m joining. I felt particularly strong about this considering we’re living in a small apartment now and I was clinging to the idea of a gym as my own personal getaway whenever needed.

At first her reaction was only slightly negative. I explained why I felt this way and ultimately, she said she understood. I’ve since joined that gym and have been going regularly. But whenever I come home and she asks me, “how was it?”, I tell her “great” and then I just feel a massive amount of guilt because I know she’d like to be a member as well.

AITA?”