Giving birth is a huge deal. Moms have to take care of their bodies and ensure their baby is healthy. There are many complications that can make pregnancy and birth difficult.
It’s normal for couples to talk about expectations and wishes so that they won’t have to make them on the fly as the mother is trying to have the baby. One mom confessed her wishes on Reddit: she made her husband agree to choose her life over that of the baby if any complications should arise.
As you can see, this is a sensitive topic. The Reddit thread went viral, and some of the site’s users made great points for and against the mother’s decision.
“So my daughter was born 2 years ago, I had a very good pregnancy but develop gestational diabetes at 32 weeks (due to me being overweight I was checking my sugar levels every other day).
Due to this my OBGYN schedule a cesarean I didn’t have any issues with this I just wanted my baby to be born safely. So before going in to the hospital I talked with my husband that if something where to happened and he needed to choose between myself and our baby to please choose me. He got quiet but said that he agreed and that please let me mother know about what we talked.
Everything went according to plan and both of us where completely fine.”—Aithana
The discussion came up again after a second pregnancy, so the thread further adds,
“Now fast forward to now trying for number two and in a Christmas party with my girlfriends the topic was brought up about babys. There’s another friend that is also trying so the topic of conversation was on that for a good hour.
When my friend ask me that if I was ready for another 9 months of pregnancy and how I felt. I answer truthfully cause honestly I was just letting all the fears and doubts go.
I said that I do want another baby and that pregnancy doesn’t scare me such as giving birth again. I said that I straight told my husband again that I’m scared that something may happened to me during the birth and in the hopes of giving my daughter a sibling I could leave her without a mother. That the original agreement stands that he needs to choose me if that’s the case.
My friends where disgusted with my thinking and said that i was an asshole to my husband in asking him to basically kill his baby (those where the exact words), that I was a very negative person and that I needed to rethink my thoughts. I’m a person that likes to be prepared for the worse case scenario and hope for the best. I didn’t want my husband to be blindsided with who to choose and to have the answer on the spot. Nobody likes to think in what could go wrong specially in a pregnancy but I need to think every possible case that we could encounter.”
The original thread also features comments from other women who made the same agreement with their husbands, and they agreed. Mostly.
1. You don’t have to be a martyr
2. Just so you know… your life comes before the baby’s.
3. Widows are not prepared for that type of trauma.
4. Nobody wants to leave their kids motherless.
Regardless of your thoughts on the matter, the thread serves as a reminder that future parents have a lot to discuss when it comes to pregnancy and health matters. Both parties should agree on what they want.
What do you think of the thread and the mother’s decision? The comments section is ready for your opinion.