She Refuses to Let Her Daughter Get Surgery. Is She Wrong?

When it comes to optional surgeries, people can go either way.

And if a surgery is optional for a child, that opens up a whole lot of questions…

Read this story that a mother shared on Reddit’s “Am I the A**hole?” page and see if you think she’s in the wrong in this situation.

AITA for refusing to let my daughter get a surgery?

“Hi, all. I (F30) have been dealing with chronic medical issues all my life. I married my (33) husband, L, a few years ago and had my daughter A (5) soon after.

When I was pregnant with A, I was warned that it would be difficult due to my issues and that she would likely have some passed on from me. I accepted this, and I expected it. She was delivered and was a beautiful baby girl who didn’t have my issues at the time.

However, as she got older, it became more apparent that she inherited my medical problems. One of which has an optional surgery that could negate it entirely. It’s possible to live with it instead of choosing to operate, but the surgery will eliminate it.

I have some trauma with hospitals in general. I’ve had to be in and out of them my entire life, and it’s left some deep wounds. It’s awful to spend your formative years stuck in a sterile room with an IV and in pain. I’ve spent some time in therapy for it, but I still h**e them.

The surgery that would remove the problem is covered by insurance, so money isn’t a problem. However, it has a long recovery period, and I don’t want my daughter to have to suffer through that.

I’ve told L that I don’t want her to have to go through the lengthy process of recovery. He disagrees and has asked my family members to “knock some sense” into me. (His words, not mine.) It’s become a big point of contention between us, and I refuse to budge.

So, AITA?”