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Sometimes you think you can tell how an Am I The A$$hole post is going to go just from reading the headline.
You’re often wrong, because the devil is in the details, but other times – like this one, for example – there’s just no saving OP from their own horrible choices.
This couple was at the vet’s office trying to figure out why the boyfriend’s (not OP’s) older dog had been struggling with his health lately.
They found out the dog had cancer and OP’s boyfriend broke down sobbing.
My f26 boyfriend’s m30 dog has been sick lately. He took him to the Vet to get him looked at and run some tests and yesterday the Vet called us for a quick appointment to talk about the dog’s condition.
We were told that he had cancer, my boyfriend didn’t take it well, he did not even give the vet time to explain to us what was really going on he just had a break down.
We exited the office and next thing I knew he dropped on his knees sobbing, Literally sobbing.
She was “shocked” at his reaction and embarrassed that people were staring. She tried getting him out to the car but he was inconsolable.
I was shocked because for one I know his dog is important to him, he had him for years and so I get this was a lot to take in and cancer is no joke, but what really bothered me was how he handled it.
His knees were on the floor and he was sobbing loudly in the hallway making everyone notice. Ngl, as a woman I’ve never even sobbed like that, I felt embarrassed for both of us.
I kept trying to get him to go to the car but he ignored me and kept sobbing.
After he had calmed down she tried talking to him about how she thought his reaction was inappropriate, embarrassing, and even worrisome.
Thankfully, he stood up for himself asking what she meant by that and asking her to leave the room.
I didn’t say anything til later after we got home and he calmed down a bit and got some sleep.
When he woke up I brought up what happened at the clinic and expressed how embarrassing what he did was, he looked at me shocked asking if I was serious and I replied that I didn’t mean to seem insensitive but I really thought he should’ve got a better hold of his emotions and handled the news better but not sob in the middle of the hallway causing people to stop and stare.
He lashed out at me calling me ridiculous and shallow to be worrying about what people think when he was dealing with a traumatic kind of news and trying to process it, I told him he overreacted because it wasn’t like the dog had died and seeing him act this way worried me.
He doubled down and lashed out again accusing me of implying that he has mental issues and was acting crazy but that wasn’t what I meant.
He told me to leave the room after we got further in the argument and today he’s gone quiet.
She says her problem wasn’t with him not acting manly, but just his reaction in general and that she wasn’t trying to be insensitive.
I honestly felt like I probably should not have brought it up like that given his reaction but I didn’t mean to seem insensitive.
AITA?
Editing this to say that my issue was never about him reacting like that just because he’s a man, No, this isn’t about that but it’s about the way he reacted, I just did not think it was handled right, that’s all.
And also, I do show support and the news was devastating to me too since I help take care of the dog and that bond is there even though it’s his dog.
Y’all, get ready for these comments, because they will actually make you feel better about the state of the world.
“You don’t get to tell other people how to feel” is about all that needs to be said, and I hope that OP hears it and takes it to heart.
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You don’t have to understand, you just have to empathize.
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It’s just about basic human compassion.
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Her thought process on this confrontation is really hard to understand.
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It’s really not that hard to be a decent human being.
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I do think she’s probably one of those people who just doesn’t show her emotions, but dang. Just because that’s your choice doesn’t mean you can expect it from others.
How would you have responded if you were her boyfriend? Would you still be a couple? Tell us why or why not in the comments!
