Alright. Let me explain the title of the article. The woman in this relationship is an American from the northeastern portion of the country, while her husband’s family is from the American south.
And this is where it’s about to get good, people.
Like most relationship issues, OP (original poster) wasn’t aware there was an issue at first. She and her husband were happily living in the northeast together when her in-laws and another childhood friend of her husband’s decided to move from the south.
They were having their first friendly get together, a socially-distanced picnic, when her father-in-law and the male friend started to rib her husband about how much “help” he gives his wife when it comes to the kid.
They also gave her crap for not “making him a plate” of food before she sat down with her own.
The other two men continued to brag about how the run their families, despite the fact that OP says all of the women work full time in addition to their other duties.
The day left a sour taste in her mouth, and that was before her husband took off for a walk with the menfolk, leaving her to clean up and watch their kid at the same time.
Not only that, but instead of apologizing, her husband doubled down.
He told her that she was being disrespectful to his “southern culture” where traditional gender roles are favored and prized.
So, she told him that was a bunch of crap and sexism isn’t the same as culture and now he’s angry.
I imagine that she’s angry, too, not realizing that she married and had a child with someone who views her as little more than a maid, cook, household organizer, mother, oh, and also breadwinner.
Commenters on Reddit were quick to swoop to OP’s side, saying that she needed to get that man’s head turned around, and fast, otherwise there wasn’t much point in sticking around.
Others pointed out that her husband only wants to claim the parts of that culture that work for him, not against him.
This person called out the fact that tradition and culture are just not the same thing (thank you).
Also, the husband definitely needs a new friend. Guess we can’t get him a new father, though.
It is a bit of a contradiction, don’t you think?
If this woman truly wants to compromise, I don’t know, maybe she could learn how to bake a nice pecan pie instead of taking on 100% of the emotional labor in the house?
Just a thought.
Give me yours in the comments!