Have you ever met someone and you liked them so much that you overlooked some serious red flags?
Yeah, I’d venture to say that most of us have been there at some point.
But we’re only human, right?
Check out the red flags that AskReddit users ignored and see if yours compare…
1. On a break…
“He hadn’t actually told his ex they were broken up, just that they needed to “take a break.”
I should have taken a break too at that point.”
2. A big lie.
“The biggest red flag I ignored was the one I was waving in my own face every time I chose to lie about or omit something to avoid hurting my wife’s feelings or to avoid an argument instead of just being transparent and forthcoming and figuring out our problems.
Happy spouse happy life is a big fat lie people. You’re going to hurt your best friend real bad if you keep it up.”
3. Loser.
“His friends had to convince me to stay with him after I was hospitalized for 3 days (miscarriage that turned into an hemorrhage) and he didn’t visit once.”
4. Uh oh.
“When my (now, thankfully ex-) boyfriend told me his psychologist was concerned about him dating but he thought we would “beat the odds” and “be a success story.””
5. All about drama.
“Sometimes the drama she had with other people didn’t make sense.
I’d ask “what did they say?” and she would generalize in a vague way. One time I doubled down and asked “literally what exact words were said” and she started crying because she was so upset.
Turns out she invented drama (including faking phone calls, emails, text messages). She couldn’t give me exact words because there were no exact words. She was just a f**king sociopath.”
6. Cheater.
“My friends were telling me my ex gf was hanging out a little too closely to her ex bf.
Unfortunately I had more faith in her than she deserved that she wouldn’t cheat, but she did.”
7. Non-stop moving.
“Before I met him, he moved from the south to the west coast, because he thought that would make him happy. Then we moved from the west cost to NYC, because he thought that would make him happy.
Then we moved to the south, because he thought that would make him happy. Then we bought a house, because he thought that would make him happy. Then he bought a motorcycle, because he thought that would make him happy. Then he took flying lessons, because he thought that would make him happy.
Then a great big hurricane came and we had to move to Houston, and he took 6 months off of work and trying to find a job, because he thought that would make him happy. Then he took my work bonus and bought a corvette, because he thought that would make him happy.
Then I divorced him and that made me happy.”
8. Psycho.
“I had a crush my first semester of college. He didn’t like me talking to his friends and got mad at me for adding them back on snapchat but I didn’t think anything of it.
Turns out he was talking to 20 other Asian girls and wanted to make sure none of them were talking to other dudes so its easier to control them.
Also he’d send me videos of himself flexing his muscles and at the time I found it flirty. But now looking back on it it came off as kind of shallow.”
9. Cancelled.
“He’d recently been “cancelled” as he called it, by his main friends group.
Then I started noticing that people he had to interact with somewhat regularly like apartment staff clearly hated him and behaved very stiffly or awkwardly when he’d run into them with me around.
Then any mutual people we knew were way more surprised than seemed appropriate to me to hear we were dating. Turns out he pretty much made up a persona to lure me in, but after dating like six or eight weeks I realized he was completely lying or delusional about who he was.
Also he made a point to at least once a day point out how “100% straight, hetero, NOT GAY” he was, which obviously starts to look suspicious, along with several other signs that sorta added up. I think he’s at least bi but vehemently h**es the idea and is in extreme denial.
I wouldn’t have a bit of a problem at all if he was, but the denial and overcompensation was just another part of the overall illusion that ultimately started falling apart once I paid attention to the red flags.
I truly wanted to at least have that conversation with him and be a safe person to at least let him question himself without any guard up, but I know he would’ve absolutely lost his shit if I asked him to gently question his sexuality in any way whatsoever. I really wish him the best and hope he finds his way.”
10. Ugh.
“All he talked about was his ex.
On the first date whilst he was waiting for me for my taxi, he got a text saying his ex was now official with one of his friends. He knew they were talking but didn’t think they’d go official.
He moaned about how annoyed he was about it until my taxi showed up. Once I’d got home he apologised for moaning to me so I thought I’d see him again. Any date after this he kept bringing her up at any chance… for example if I said “I’m going to have the chicken” he would say “Emma loved chicken”.”
11. Yikes.
“She named our future kids and painted sunflowers on our future front yard picket fence… all in her head of course.
This was while we were both in college and breaking up pretty regularly in multiples of 28 days.
I was stuck in that relationship 2.5 years… which was 2.4 years longer than it needed to be.”
12. Didn’t know any better.
“A grown adult saying that he liked that I was under 18.
I was 15 and didn’t know any better.
It took a long time to figure out that I wasn’t the one to blame for that situation, he should have done the responsible thing and not talk to me.”
What do you think about this?
Let us know in the comments.
Thanks, amigos!
