In some relationships, you just KNOW.
You realize things have changed and something feels off and it’s time to end it.
But all relationships end differently, as I’m sure you’re very aware of.
AskReddit users talked about when they realized that their relationships were over.
Have a look for yourself.
1. Jerk.
“My mother d**d.
He did the bare minimum of sympathy and support for a few weeks, then got angry and disgusted at the fact that I was still grieving.”
2. That’ll do it.
“We were apart for two weeks. I flew to meet him.
He was waiting at the airport for me.
As I descended the escalator, I could see him standing there, and I felt no happiness.”
3. Playing the victim.
“After every disagreement ended with her playing the victim, blaming her exes or her childhood and me having to apologize for it.
She did have trauma, but that wasn’t my fault. She clearly wasn’t ready to move on yet.
I hope she was able to process her trauma and get into a healthy relationship but I have a feeling she went back to the toxic ex.”
4. In denial.
“It was about 7 months after she moved half the country away. I was in denial the whole time.
16 years we were together. I spent a year in mental torment and depression.”
5. Ouch.
“When, after a week of acting weird, he finally confessed that not only had he had s** with a friend of his two months ago at a party, but now she’s pregnant.”
6. Gaslighting.
“When I’d had enough of the gaslighting, emotional a**se and major boundary crossing issues.
When we stopped working as a team, and our counselling sessions stopped being attended by both of us.
Guess the ex didn’t like that the conversation revolved around learning to compromise and that no adult always gets their way in life.
I am in a better but lonelier headspace, but I’m glad to be out of that cesspool marriage. 1.5 years out and I’m still so upset that I accepted way less than I deserve, never again will I ignore my gut instinct to leave.”
7. Liar.
“When I stopped believing his lies.
You cannot be in love if you cannot be truthful and you are not a good person if all you do is lie.”
8. That sucks.
“She used me to move in together promising to help pay bills and clean the house, then after we moved in together she never paid any of the bills or cleaned the house and I lost all my savings because of it.”
9. Still hurts.
“I plugged my ex’s old phone in (we were married at the time) so I could factory restore it and let the kids use it for Netflix or whatever.
She was still signed in to Facebook. Immediately I got a live feed of her conversation with another dude.
I saw a message that included “sucked you off”, and that pretty much did it. On top of the fact that this was going on for like 9 months, and she painted a picture that she was a single mom with a deadbeat baby daddy.
Fed the kids, waited for her to come home, tucked them in and confronted her.
I’m sick just thinking about it.
Almost 4 years ago and it still hurts.”
10. It’s over.
“We were only three months into the relationship and I was pretty happy with what we had, until she asked me if we were together because we wanted to be, or if it was because we were afraid to be alone.
We were VERY different people. She was super Christian, I’m an atheist. She was very talkative and optimistic, I’m quiet and fairly cynical. It was a relationship straight out of a sitcom. Obviously we had very stark differences, but we had never had a bad argument because we knew how to communicate our feelings and viewpoints properly when we disagreed.
But that question consumed me. I tried to convince myself otherwise, because I am not afraid to be alone, but I doubted that I would ever find someone as genuinely kind and caring as she was. She was the type of person who always put others before herself. She had some quirks I found annoying, but I tried to convince myself that they were endearing because I loved her.
That question made me be honest with myself. I loved her and would never want to hurt her, but I was not in love with her. The spark I had felt at the beginning of the relationship fizzled out in two weeks after that question.
We were eating at a restaurant after watching the new Thor movie and she was stirring her food, clearly deep in thought. I asked her what she was thinking about, and she said that she had missed me all week (we lived about 20 miles apart and were usually only able to see each other on the weekends) and was wondering if I had missed her.
I just started crying without saying a word because I knew I had not, and knew she could tell as our conversations had been fairly dry for the last two weeks. She tried to salvage it by talking about my favorite audiobook series that she was listening to, but at that point, we both knew it was over. She deserves a lot better.”
11. Bad signs.
“Taking phone calls in a different room.
Parking outside around corner for 10 min before coming home.
Excuses made to not have s** or complaints about it.
Less touchy feely.
Kisses and hugs felt empty.
Body language.
Less call/texts with very slow replies….if you get them. (while the phone is always within reach)
Less/no compliments.
No interest or asking first in seeing you or doing anything.
Saying nice things and showing nothing in action.”
12. Blame it on the meds.
“I started anti-anxiety meds and my ex-husband immediately wanted me to get off of them because I started seeing his emotional manipulation for what it was, instead of getting caught up in the anxiety and just quietly going along with whatever he wanted, to make it easier.
He would get me all riled up on purpose and then turn around and say that I’m unstable because how can I react like that after he just spent like 30 minutes doing the most juvenile stuff to get me to that point.
I mean like put hands over his ears and go “la la la”. Tell me to calm my tits after he did something either neglectful or hurtful. He would belittle my feelings and tell me to deal with it because nothing’s going to change.
Before my meds I would just basically just be the ‘okay face’ meme. Once I was on my meds I stopped reacting the way he wanted me to and he kept getting angrier and angrier.
He kept escalating his manipulation until one day after a fight of him telling me how badly he wanted to leave me (again. Usually he starts calling apartments in front of me while I sob for him not to break up the family.) I told him go if hes so desperate to leave. I went out to dinner with my dad and I came back to the house full of boxes and him locked in the room.
I didn’t talk to him because I knew this was another manipulation tactic to try and get me to cry. I didn’t cry instead I called my mom and asked if I can come sleep over there. He drove me because he said that if I took the car this wasn’t going to work which obviously meant him leaving.
Right before we got to my mom’s he flat out said that he has an apartment in a different state 12 hours away from my family and any sort of support I could have and asked if I was coming with him or not I said no he said then goodbye.
Threw everything out of the car onto the driveway of my mom’s house and screeched out.
He left at 5:00 a.m. the next morning and I didn’t accept any of his calls or texts for a week. When I finally did he had the nicest tone on telling me that he never left me and that this was a business trip that we had talked about.
Again if I was off my meds I might have believed him and doubted my own sanity. But I knew for a fact we had not talked about it and all of his actions the night before proved otherwise (also he stole my computer).
To this day he blames my medicine for why our relationship is broken. In a way he’s right. My medicine was the only way I was able to see the a**se for what it was.”
When did you realize your relationship was over?
Tell us your stories in the comments.
Thanks in advance!
