14 People Share How They Reacted When They Caught Partners Cheating on Them

I’ve never had a person cheat on me before…at least not that I know of…

But I guess you really never know until a person decides to come clean and spill the beans about what they’ve been up to when they were “out with their friends for the night.”

It’s enough to drive a person crazy, isn’t it?

What really happens when a person finds out that their significant other has been cheating on them?

Let’s take a look at these true stories from AskReddit users.

1. She seems distant…

“4 years ago I was dating a girl who became distant and disinterested in a lot of things we both enjoyed together.

Despite attempts to talk about it, she only grew more distant then became less available to hang out and suddenly was working late a lot. I started getting suspicious about cheating when she was on her phone nonstop.

Again I tried to talk about it but she wouldn’t engage. She also just didn’t want to break up with me for whatever reason.

I was actually going to end it on my own, but one weekend when she was seemingly unavailable, some mutual friends told me they spotted her with a dude from her work and they were all over each other.

Coincidentally, she had also lent me her ipad and it was synced to her phone so I saw lots of texts between those two over that weekend. They were talking about running away together, etc.

He was married and her supervisor. Mutual friends were also composed of her coworkers and reported them to HR. They were both forced to do training on not sleeping with coworkers, they were both denied promotion, his wife left him, and she moved overseas.

Sucked at the time, I was devastated, but karma got them good.”

2. Found out at work.

“I was at work, as was he, and a man came through the doors and asked for me directly.

I introduced myself and he said “Hello, my name is XYZ and your husband has been having an affair with my wife”. It was 8 days to our 3 yearr anniversary. The affair had been ongoing for 6 months and he had a slew of evidence to prove it.

We had lunch together, where he explained everything to me. His wife of 12 years, having 4 children together. I confronted my husband that night and he didn’t even attempt to deny it, he wasn’t even sorry.

I moved out with our 2 yr old daughter that night and we were divorced 3 months later. It’s been 9 years now and still blows my mind.”

3. Ghosted.

“Classic love at first sight. I love you after 2 weeks.

Moved in together after 2 months. Engaged after 6. Been together for 4 years and change. Left my rent control bachelor pad and Picked a bigger apartment so she could have her art studio.

Did everything together and split all bills 50/50. We had different jobs in the same industry and made around the same money. We really loved each other and, as cliche as it sounds, completed each other: I am very analytical and stoic and she is a liberal artist.

She goes to ComiCon in NYC (she is an expositor) I help her pack. I drop her at the airport. Everything was fine. No signs of anything. She should be back in 4 days.

She never came back home. She simply disappeared. Ghosted. The day she should be home I freak out that she may be dead just to find myself blocked on everything: email, phone, social media, the works.

Everything I know is due to the bills she left behind (all unpaid) the credit card we shared (she stopped paying 2 months before) and her cell phone bill (which T-Mobile was nice enough to give me a log because technically was on my SSN).

Found one particular NYC area code over and over on the call history and put 2+2 together. She met him on San Diego ComiCon few months before and methodically and systematically put together a plan to abandon me, take as much as she could to NYC and never look back.

Plot twist: she maxed our credit card and amazon card furnishing their new home in NYC. By the time grief turned into practicality it was too late for me to cancel everything. I literally had to log in and see all purchases of houseware, made with my money, for a house I will never live in.

I could not live at our house or afford our lifestyle in one income alone. It was a good 6 months of Blackout drunk, tinder and overall self loath. I am sure I caused damage to other people in the process.

It wasn’t even the love part that hurt me the most but the flat out betrayal and economic damage (took me over an year of living paycheck to paycheck to get all balances to zero).

She is a Redditor: if you are reading this E. Frye. I don’t hate you, but you destroyed my self-esteem forever. I cannot ever trust anyone ever again.

You ripped my heart from my chest, watched it die slowly and didn’t care for the mess.”

4. A little detective work.

“Back then Facebook used to display on your profile stuff like “dontsayaword2 liked a photo” and everything you did.

I noticed he liked a photo of a girl that seemed to be someone he had recently added. So I checked her profile and she was one of those girls who think “they won” because men cheat on their partners with them. She had everything public, photos with him, bragging about the texts they exchanged etc.

So I engineered a way to befriend her roommate, I would then find out she was bringing other dudes home besides my boyfriend and when I confronted him I also let him know about who else she was sleeping with and for him to get an STD test.”

5. What a nightmare.

“I couldn’t find my then wife after she got off work one afternoon/evening. I tried to call her cell phone with no answer. She didn’t show up to the house until 9:30 pm.

She weaved some tale about getting stuck in traffic. I did some sleuthing and pulled the State Farm good driving app up which tracks your movements. I found out she had been leaving work early, going to the nearby rest area off of the expressway, and having s*x with a 20-something trucker she met at her previous job.

I decided to interrupt the festivities one afternoon. I showed up to the rest area, parked in front of his rig, and jumped right up to the door. The cabin shade was drawn. I withdrew the shades and saw my loving ex wife with a m*th pipe in her hand and was going to town on this guy. He had the gall to tell me to give them privacy.

I didn’t handle it very well. I called the cops, they both were arrested for possession, and I promptly filed for divorce. The icing on the cake is that a few months after I left, she cheated on her new trucker friend and is well on her way to her 7th “friend”.

God speed, you wet, musty nightmare.”

6. The UPS guy.

“Dated a girl for about two years.

Like 18 months into the relationship we’re talking about moving in together. Then kinda out of no where she starts becoming distant and irritable. We ended up breaking up.

Fast forward 3 months after the break up I found that Facebook has a section where messages from non friends are kept. Turns out my then gf was banging her ex and the UPS driver that delivered to her store at the mall.

She ended getting with the UPS driver and his 3 kids. Last I checked they’re f*cking miserable and it brings me joy every time I think about it.”

7. A total jerk.

“My (now ex) husband demanded constant access to all of my social media and cell phone messages and was constantly accusing me of cheating even though he had no reason to think I would do that.

I had nothing to hide. Never even thought of cheating. I was watching our young kids 24-7 and didn’t even have transportation since he “accidentally” totalled my car.

One day I handed over my phone for him to check for other men and asked to see his. He hesitated but then handed it over. There was a long, s*xual, text history with one of the teenage girls who works for him.

He tells me he’s in love with her and wants her to move in with us. I was in total shock, dropped his phone cracking it. He retaliated by breaking my laptop.

He’s a wonderful man and I miss him every day (sarcasm).

8. Married young.

“We got married when I was 17, and he was 21. He was shipping off to sea, and I was escaping a bad home life.

When he came back after his deployment, he wasn’t the same person anymore. After about 6 months, he gained weight on purpose to fail his physicals so he’d get kicked out of the Navy.

Fast forward a year, I’m working full time, and he is sitting at home, watching anime and drinking during the day, and telling me that he “was applying to jobs”.

I was applying to universities when my laptop died on me. I asked to use his to finish an app, and while doing so a message popped up on his FB.

A topless pic of his ex, from her. I was shocked and opened it to find that they’d been dating for a loooong time (started again while he was at sea in the Navy, he would talk to her and never to me, saying that he never got the time to email).

She had sent him a pic because he had said how he missed having big t*ts like hers to play with, and how mine were just too small so he felt like he was f*cking a boy or a child.

I confronted him, he made a bunch of pitiful excuses. I had my friends come to the house that day and kick him out while I went to work.

He then stalked me for the next few years, and made posts on his FB about how I was a coward, he sent emails and called from blocked numbers to tell me that “a restraining order is just a piece of paper” or that ‘our vows before God made me his property’ and sh*t like that.

Then he bought a gun, and started telling our friends that “if he cant have me no one can”.

I ended up talking to our friends, and told everyone conflicting information about where I was going, and moved states. I deleted all my personal social media accounts and lived in fear for years, watching him continually make memes about how he loved his wife and would do anything for her.

It took 8 years for me to finally get the divorce from him.”


“Was (~6 months in) recovering from being hit by an SUV as a pedestrian that left me with a severe TBI (GCS of 4), broken back (3 places), legs (two places), and pelvis (2 places).

I had moved back in with my then-GF for about a week when we went to a party and I got left at the party because she couldn’t find me. I didn’t know any of these people as they were all her friends and none of them could help me get home when I was told she left with the group we arrived with.

I managed to walk back to the apartment quite drunk, tired, and in pain from over using my still recovering injuries; banged on the door till my knuckles bled only to have a dude answer the door, let me in, and then he proceeded to crawl back into bed next to her, in my bed.

I didn’t have the cognitive ability to deal with that. So I laid down right on the floor next to the bed and and passed out. She broke up with me the next day and blamed me for it.

This story has so much more detail to it, but I don’t want to re-live that year of trauma in too much detail.”

10. No answer.

“I was at work and tried to call my boyfriend, but he wasn’t answering even after a few hours, and I just got a horrible feeling. It stressed me out so badly for some reason that I started to cry and my boss let me go home.

The whole way home I just kept feeling serious dread. Walked in the house and into my bedroom, and he was laying in bed half-clothed with some naked chick.

Obviously a huge blowup went down, and after everything settled, this motherf*cker tried to tell me that he went to the movies alone and met her there and she “followed him home.”

Like, even if I believe that this person just followed you home and got naked, you let her do it, so what’s the purpose of saying that to me? It was a sh*tty abusive relationship, and it didn’t even end then.

I eventually broke up with him but not on the spot like I should have. If I could change anything about my life, it would be that I wish I broke up with that guy sooner.

That was over ten years ago though!”

11. Being sneaky.

“I found out he had signed up for a bunch of apps. Such as Ashley Madison, Tinder, and Bumble. He would messages mutual acquaintances asking if they’d be up for massages, etc.

I blamed myself for years that he wasn’t interested in s*x with me because I’d had a baby and gained a little weight. Nope. He just enjoyed contacting other woman for s*x more..

We’re in the middle of our divorce now. He doesn’t understand why I’m wrecking our marriage because of a few indiscretions.”

12. That’s bad.

“I didn’t catch her, she told me and told me I wasn’t a real man and that’s why she did it. She just told me everything she hated about me, went on to why I’m worthless pulled over, kicked me out the car and I had to walk back to my place.

As far as my reaction went. I went home, cried, went to bed, stayed in bed for a few days, thought I was a terrible person for a few weeks, cut my holiday leave short and went back to work early to get my mind off things.”

13. Blessing in disguise.

“Ex-wife actually asked me for her blessing to commit adultery with another married man.

She was shocked when I said I don’t support it, she went ballistic (has severe mental health issues), went and did it anyway and ended up in a psych ward. 2 marriages ended and now the two cheaters are engaged.

Little devastated at first. Blessing in disguise.”

14. Lots of little things.

“It wasn’t a big dam-breaking moment. It was a lot of little things.

Like how she’d cancel plans at the last second. Or the random phone calls from unknown numbers she’d get (this was back before spam calls were an epidemic), or how her phone was mysteriously off one night when I needed to get a hold of her.

I had my suspicions and then finally it clicked into place when I did some Instagram snooping and found a guy who followed her who posted a selfie wearing a very unique jacket that belonged to her.

I confronted her the next day. She denied it. Tears. Begging. All of that. I dumped her and walked away. The next day I messaged that guy on Instagram and he confirmed everything. Had no idea I existed. He dumped her too.

Last I heard she’s an EMT in Wyoming. Hope she figured out how not to be a garbage person.”

Now we’d like to hear from you.

Have you ever had a significant other cheat on you?

If so, please tell us your story in the comments.

Thanks in advance!