“Wow, you really dodged a bullet, there.”
You’ve probably said that at some point in your life, or maybe someone else has said it to you – either way, you’ve definitely heard it, and most of the time, it does not (thankfully) refer to a literal bullet.
Some things can be almost as scary, though, which these 15 people illustrate just perfectly.
15. Some wives would have done the opposite.
After i had a stroke, i was in a coma and it didn’t look like i’d wake up.
The drs asked my wife if they should let me go. i only exist because she said no.
I didn’t dodge a bullet so much as my wife blocked it for me.
14. My parent heart just stopped.
My dad was a truck driver in the oilfield in Canada. He worked a lot of long hours and every single day. So on weekends he would bring me and my younger brother on some of his jobs. We were on location and my little brother (3 yrs) and me (10 yrs) were waiting for him playing in cab of truck. My little brother opened the passenger door and my little arms closed it.
Jobs done, we start our trek home going about 35 km/hr and the door flies open and I get sucked out of truck. I remember doing about 10 back flips as I tumbled out. Hitting the ground on my back a few times and rolling my way to a stop. I stood up before the truck was even stopped in absolute shock.
Next thing I see my dad looking for me and he burst into tears. First time I ever seen him cry. I’m 33 now and he still won’t talk to me about it. Luckily the rig was in a farmers field. So when we were leaving I landed on softer dirt.
Not a single scratch on me. Dad thought he ran over me with trailer. Don’t think we ever went to work with dad again. I work for the company now.
13. Some friend.
A friend had lost his job under suspicious circumstances. A few weeks later he asked me to take him to the bank, as I got near to pick him up I caught a train. He called to say never mind he would get someone else.
A few days later a friend sent out a message to a large number of our friends, this guy lost his job and was running a check cashing con – Can you cash this check for me?
I’ll pay you $50 if you do.
The check is $500, he has no backing funds, you eat the whole amount.
He did this to several friends in a few day to amass a few grand and was about to skip town when the cops got him.
12. Thank goodness for that.
I fell out of a farm truck with I was a about 8, going about 35 down a “just out of town” stretch of highway.
I bounced a few times and came to a stop just about to the shoulder of the road. I remember overwhelming certainty that I was going to die, and I rolled to the ditch.
Missed getting run over by about 10 inches.
Got up, my mom had come back for me and immediately took me to the ER where I was given a total clean bill of health. Not a bump (tho I did have a nasty bruise where I hit the road initially).
Who knew kids were made of rubber?
11. Better listen up.
Not me, but I had a field service engineer working on one of my big robotic liquid handlers. He decided to bypass the safety pin that prevents the heads from moving while the cover is open while he had a diagnostic program queued up on the computer. What he didn’t know was that the instant he reinserted the safety pin the machine would execute the queued instructions and start moving, and he had a hand inside it right in the danger zone.
I grabbed his shoulder and yanked his hand out an instant before it was crushed. He stopped ignoring me when I told him to stop bypassing safety lockouts to save a few minutes.
10. That’s as gross as it is scary.
A few years ago I had pneumonia, but my whole family insisted that it was just post nasal drip, (Which runs in the family) after a week or two I woke up in the middle of the night when I couldn’t feel my arm. After I got to the ER the doctor said that it was the worst he’d ever seen and he was surprised I wasn’t dead.
I had 3 lbs of mucus cut out of my lungs and another two weeks in the hospital siphoning out the rest.
For three months afterwards I could barely walk half a mile without starting to pass out and I still can’t run for more than 200-300 yards without collapsing.
9. Someone was looking out.
My newborn needed to be rushed to a super high level NICU to be put into a state of induced hypothermia, because he only had hours before he would suffer permanent brain damage. I live in a small town in the middle of no where.
The small town next door just barely upgraded their hospital to have that hypothermia suite, one of only a few in Texas.
He’s doing great, no sign of any damage.
8. That’ll get your heart pumping.
Around 30,000 pounds.
I was driving with my wife in town one snowy evening and we had pulled up to a stop light. I happened to glance up at the rear view mirror and saw a city bus heading towards us… and rotating sideways.
I hit the gas and pulled ahead into the intersection and left into the turning lane, and less than a second later, the bus went sliding through right where our car was.
It came to a stop on the other side of the intersection and fortunately didn’t hit anything, but one second or two feet difference and we would’ve had some nice spinal injuries.
7. Thankful he was there.
I stayed up all night before a daytrip to Hong Kong. You know that daze when you haven’t slept, you’re just kinda robotic and doing the human stuff, nearly zero awareness of anything?
Well, I went to cross a street and my friend behind me SNATCHED my shoulder and yanked me backwards just in time to feel the WHOOSH of a doubledecker bus breezing past us. I just looked at him like “oh, thanks man” and it took a whole extra minute for my brain to process I would be fucken ded had he not grabbed me.
6. A harrowing afternoon.
ears ago I lived in Vancouver and liked to go for long walks (beautiful city to do so). I was heading to a friends first to drop something off and and cut through a neighbourhood with a lot of south east asian immigrants ( the ones I got to talk to were mostly from Vietnam). I was aware of a van behind me but it was mid day and there were people out, so it was only a passing thought.
A lady was working in her garden and as i approached her house she started to look behind me. Then she came out onto the side walk and started talking to me in her native language. I understood none of it but her body language was adgitated. She kept jestering to me to come with her up their walkway.
As I looked behind me I see three men getting out of the van, which is now parked just behind me. By this point the woman has a good grip on my arm and and has me dragged almost to her porch. She kept talking to me and pointing to stuff in her garden and i just listened, nodded, and kept a good eye on the men and van.
I dont remember how long we were there but the men finally left. Both myself and the woman let out huge sighs of relief. She then patted me on the arm, said something, and then went back to her gardening. I booted it to my friends house.
On the news the next day was the story of a woman who was kidnapped and gang rape. The victim was grabbed on the next street over from the woman’s house, not long after my encounter with her, by 5 men in a van. The men were distinctive and the decription of the men and van fit the ones I had see.
That woman saved me from something horrible and I am forever thankful.
5. Heroes are everywhere.
I think I saved a baby’s life once. It was in a city center, crossing a main road with a while bunch of other people. The dad was pulling the pram behind him onto the pavement while he texted on his phone, and the dumb fuck didn’t realist he’d left the pram just… there on the road while he himself was on the pavement.
Everyone kinda ignored it while the traffic lights kept that section of road clear but then the lights changed and the fucking moron still hadn’t looked up from his phone while a huge double decker was bearing down on his offspring. Out of the whole crowd I was the only one to push forward and pull the pram onto the pavement.
The complete imbecile gave a grunt of surprise and dropped his phone as the bus whooshed past and he realised he’d utterly failed in his parenting responsibilities, which was some consolation. I hope it shattered.
4. That airport is a menace.
Many years ago, my flight had just landed at Chicago O’hare and the plane was taxiing when the pilot suddenly slammed on the brakes. People were literally thrown forward against the seat in front of them.
A few seconds later, another plane (taking off I think) went screaming by right in front of us.
No explanation was given, though our imaginations provided a lot of gory details.
3. Hot Pockets can be heroes, too.
Hubs, my sister, and I were hanging out around my parents’ house on a very boring 4th of July. We decided to wash my husband’s new car sitting in the driveway because it was hot out and an excuse to play in the hose.
We were literally walking out the front door, and I said “eh, we should eat lunch before we get all wet and stuff”, and everyone agreed, so we turned around and went back inside.
I was warming up something in the microwave (a hot pocket I think), and all of a sudden I hear the loudest BANG I think I’ve ever heard, from the direction of the front door. Hubs and I look at each other wide-eyed and run outside.
I was greeted by the back-end of a Crown Vic, smoking something fierce, plowed into the tree in the middle of our yard. For a split-second I was just stunned, then screamed to my sister inside to call 911. I looked over to the driveway, at the car we had been planning to wash just 5 minutes ago.
Totaled. Completely totaled. Brand new 2011 G6, destroyed. Guy hit it so hard it did a complete 90 degree turn across the driveway. He actually hit it so hard, it ended up ricocheting and hitting the other cars in the driveway, mauling 2 other cars. Yard was fucked, Crown Vic was fucked, tree was fucked.
We immediately assumed it was drunk driving, being the 4th and all…I went over to the driver’s side and found a very old man, very bewildered, unable to comprehend what I was saying but conscious. I will never forget the look he gave me – confused, helpless, scared. I was on the line with the paramedics as they sent over the ambulances, and tried my best to follow their instructions. (My sister was only 14 at the time, so I handled the call)
Turns out dude was diabetic and had passed out behind the wheel due to low blood sugar, hit the gas pedal with his weight as he passed out, and was plowing down our residential street at about 65mph. He jumped the curb, drove down the sidewalk past another house, then slammed into my husband’s car, and subsequently, the tree.
If we had been anywhere near that yard/driveway, I have no doubt one or all of us would have been seriously injured or dead. It was sheer dumb luck and timing that saved us. Huge bullet dodged…or should I say, huge car dodged.
2. Deep thoughts for a kid.
As a kid, after running errands in town with my mom, I was climbing into the backseat of our family station wagon.
A semi-truck hit a power line pole down the street causing the still-live wire to fall, bounce off the roof of the car and hang across the open door just a foot or two above my legs.
Raised catholic, I wondered for a while after if I had actually died that day and that the rest of what I thought was my life was my purgatory.
1. Little fires everywhere.
Was going to move to a different apartment complex last month…got injured at work and lost hours; therefore, couldn’t come up with the deposit money in time.
Last week some asshat was cooking meth and caught the building on fire.
We’ve all dodged a few things like this in our life, right?
Share yours near-misses in the comments!