If you’re over thirty, you know how hard it is to meet new people, never mind people you might actually like and enjoy spending time with.
If you’re married, you have to find TWO people you BOTH like, and man. Talk about a unicorn.
There are some ways to make finding new friends easier, though, so if you’re looking for some people to pal around with, these 15 people have some decent tips.
15. Put out the right vibe.
I usually find people at work that I vibe with. I also add random people on facebook who seem interesting. Most of the time it doesn’t lead to anything. On rare occasion it leads to friends for life, including one Colorado bartender who has told me I get free drinks for life if I’m ever at any bar he’s tending.
I’m not a heavy drinker and I live on the opposite side of the country, but it’s the little things like that which matter most to me.
14. Say hi to your neighbors.
Met my two best adult friends when we were apartment neighbors. I have a city garden next to a nice person every summer and we’ve become friends. This winter i will mall walk and might meet someone.
It seems to me that you have to routinely be in close proximity to someone and eventually greetings become conversations.
13. Be a joiner.
Join in activities.
Running/Cycling/Hiking Groups/Training classes
Sports (Volleyball, Softball, Curling, Tennis meetups)
Find someone you know, or a friend of a friend that golfs and join
Meetup groups for something you enjoy
Then when they go out for drinks or food after. Say yes.
You will not make new friends if you don’t interact with them. While this may be the problem, you have to fix it by finding a way to be comfortable interacting with people. A good way is activities and hobbies.
12. This worked for my partner.
Marry someone with friends.
11. Hey, me too!
Memes. That’s how I make friends.
10. No man left behind.
I remember when I was 25. I asked my friend this question and he laughed.
Then his girlfriend of 6+ years dumped him and he realized that all his friends were actually her friends. So then he came back to me and asked me that question.
Rather than laugh at him, we started hanging out more.
9. They just multiply!
I usually make friends through friends of friends, usually cuz they have similar interests or work different time blocks than my friends so they might be on when my friends usually aren’t.
Depending how old you are as well as other criteria, you could join the military, thats where most of my current friends come from, but I realize this option isn’t for everyone.
8. Enjoy your life.
Go do things you like to do. Usually there are others that also like to do those things. Don’t do them just to make friends, do them because you actually like them.
Then you start doing those things together. From there you see if there is any other things they like to do that you also enjoy.
7. Work work work, al the time!
This one might not apply to most of you guys but: work. The reason I say that it doesn’t apply is because I moved abroad for work, and work culture in other countries is way different than back in the states.
All of my friends here I met through going out with colleagues after work. This is something I’ve never done back in the states. So short answer… move abroad!
6. Strike up a conversation.
Talk to people, I have a few gym friends that I made cause I just asked about their routines and now we chat and workout together sometimes.
5. You could try that.
I went to an open house once of the freemasons they were having as a goof, trying to recruit new members.
Anyway there was this guy there who said that the only reason he joined was because he was bored and needed new friends and something to do.
4. You have two choices.
There are two effective ways, first learn some skills that you are interested in but didn’t Pursuit before, such as playing an instrument, painting، sport etc… Then find a club or a place where people who are interested on that skill usually hang out at, even if you didn’t have any skills go for hobbies, it could be a fan club or something like that, and you will find people who are easier to start a conversation with, and with you Haveing something in common with them, you will look desirable to talk to, even if you had bad social skills.
The thing you need to make sure it’s more then a one day event, like a course that goes for a week or as i said a club, and remember it’s ok if most of them are assholes, just like dating and relationships, you will get rejected a lot, and sometimes being disrespected, and that’s ok there is no thing such as the perfect girl or friends, they only become perfect by the connection you build with them, and as long as you put yourself out there, after a while you will find few people or even one person that you will click with, and that person can open up a big circle friend’s for you.
You can be lucky with one day event if you have good social skills, if not, being seen in a place multiple times with having the same interests as the people there, you will look more friendly for people to talk too, why do you think people get more friends in school or college.
Just remember that it might take a while, as they say, “it’s not a sprint it’s a marathon!” And be careful who you become friends with and never make it about numbers, i learned the hard way that one close friend is worth like a block of gold, but a million friends are worth like grain of sand! You already know what’s more valuable. So to sum it up in a one sentence, “be valuable around people you value” and that’s how every deep human connection starts.
3. Like minds.
Hobbies. Find something you’re interested in, find a group that does it, and go. It’s always easier to talk to someone you know you have at least one thing in common with.
For me, it’s pool. I LOVE playing pool, so i joined a league and I’ve made tons of friends. Plus it’s my guaranteed night out of the house for a couple hours for me time.
I get to have a cheat meal, a couple of beers and a god time. Even when I lose I still have fun.
2. It’s not easy.
I have this same question, but as a “homeschool” kid. Never had any friends in my life, and now I’m nearing adult, never had any dates or experience, never had any friends making experience, never had any fun in my childhood, and now I figure out adults have hard times making friends too??
Ima be single and lonely forever y’all…
1. Expand your criteria.
Don’t discriminate age. I’m an adult and my friends range from 19 to 70 years old. They all contribute to my life in some way and I respect/care about them all. Even the ones where there is basically a VH1 special between our ages, teach me things and keep me grounded from becoming an angry old man.
Basically talk to anyone who is willing to talk to you. Be sure to listen as well. Friends will happen after that.
I’m going to have to try some of these. I keep waiting for my kids to make friends but they’re taking forever.
Add your own favorite tips in the comments!