15 People Recall the Dumbest Thing They Ever Heard Someone Say

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If you really keep your eyes and ears open when you’re out in the world, you’ll quickly realize something very important.


It’s true! And if you don’t believe me yet, I think these tales of very dumb people might change your mind.

AskReddit users shared their funny stories.

1. I want to meet this person.

“Oh boy I got a couple of these, all from the same guy too!

“That’s a big puddle… oh wait that’s the lake”

“I thought all sharks were male?”

“Wait you can get pregnant through anal?!”

“Nice car!” To a guy riding a motorcycle.”

2. Good luck with that.

“A women came into the ice cream shop without a mask.

When we told her she had to leave because she didn’t have one she said “I’ll just go to another one”. This would be fine if every single restaurant in town didn’t have the same rule.

Like no, you aren’t gonna go to a different shop.”

3. Another country.

“A girl asked how it felt to be an immigrant.

I said I didn’t know I’m from Hawaii. And she’s like, yeah another country why don’t you know that?”

4. Clearly a genius.

“Neighbor kid said he was really smart.

I asked him how’d he knew that, he said he just got back from the doctor’s, and the doctor said he had 20/20 vision.

Neighbor was 16.”

5. Drink up!

“My father adamantly believes that alcohol is good for you because it kills germs inside your body.”

6. Yowza…

“Back in middle school everyone was assigned a country to do a presentation on for the class.

One girl was given Nigeria. Throughout the presentation she referred to the inhabitants as “African Americans”.

At the end- the teacher corrected her and asked her why she thought people living in Nigeria would be called African Americans.

Her response- “my mom said we couldn’t use the word black or negro to describe them, so I didn’t know what else to call them.””

7. I guess I’m gay, too!

“That I am gay because I like the band Queen.”

8. Wow!

“Someone in a Trader Joe’s in the USA commented on my accent and asked where I’m from, I replied with ‘South Africa’.

She proceeded to ask ‘oh, South Africa? Where is that?’ And thinking she was making a joke I sarcastically responded ‘oh, just south of Mexico’.

She then continued on to very seriously ask me about the weather, political situation, and if we also have drug problems Mexico has.

It slowly dawned on me that this lady couldn’t work out that South Africa is in the south of Africa…”

9. The passage of time.

“My sister and I moved away from home a few months apart.

I to the other side of the country, her to another country entirely.

We didn’t see each other for something like 5 or 6 years.

First thing she did, was look at me, blink twice, and say, “you look older.”

I love her, and I know she was jet-lagged, but I cannot stop laughing every time I remember it.”

10. It’s obviously a conspiracy.

”How do we even know outer space exists? I’ve never seen space. Have you? It’s a cover-up, I tell you.”

”And who is behind that, then?”


11. Yeah, probably.

“”I wonder if Scotland still looks like that”.

My sister – watching Braveheart when it was first released.”

12. Insanity.

“Had a patient yesterday say COVID is a hoax, he was shortly after intubated due to COVID.

Completely refused to believe he had it and we were punishing him for speaking out against our fake news.

Quickly topped my list for dumbest people I’ve ever met.”

13. Makes sense to me.

“They should put Braille in cars so blind people can drive.”

14. A geography lesson.

“A couple years ago i was chatting with my friends about where we’re going on vacation.

One of my friends said ” I’m going to New Zealand, i just don’t like the fact its in Africa and it doesn’t have access to the sea.””

15. A lot of this going around.

“Someone close to me believes the vaccine for covid will actually be a chip. Like I had read that before but hearing it from someone I know was a wild experience.

I was talking to someone and they said Oxford had made a vaccine or was in the process of doing it and then this guy drops this bomb of bullsh*t, “don’t you guys know the vaccine is a chip?”

I. Was. Dumbfounded. My face expression had never changed so quickly. I said how he could possibly believe that to be true and had the audacity to say “you would know it if you went to a Christian church”.

I was livid. I asked him if he had any idea how other people made fun of those who believe that and he said “I know. But they are naive”. Just when I thought he couldn’t said anything dumber.

I’m usually a person willing to argue with people when they are wrong but this was a lost cause from the beginning. He’s always like this and just doesn’t change his mind even when you present him evidence. I just left. No matter what I said he’d still believe the vaccine is a godd*mn chip.

This is what religion does. Believe in whoever you want. You can believe in Danny DeVito for all I care but let it take you too far and you’ll become an imbecile.”

Now we’d like to hear from you!

In the comments, tell us about the dumbest thing that you’ve ever heard another person say.

Please and thank you!