15 Ways You Can Tell if a Man Is Insecure in His Masculinity

The way that we form relationships these days is so different from how we’ve historically formed bonds – we’re forced to make more snap judgements than ever because our encounters are fleeting and not usually in person.

If you’re wondering if there are some telltale signs that the man you’re interested in isn’t as secure as he could be, well, here are 15 people’s opinions on that.

15. Sports are not life.

Has to make any situation about them, has the be the “alpha”, compensates not just with a truck but constant overt “look at me” actions, disregards your opinion immediately if they disagree, dismissive towards anyone who doesn’t act like them.

Loud on purpose because they think everyone like the sound of their voice as much as they do, “act like a man bro”, constant put downs, refuses to drink any non “manly” drink, mentions how big their d%ck is (it isn’t), thinks sport knowledge is a personality trait

14. Ugh, the gym.

I go to the gym a lot, I’ve seen guys ripped af yet don’t show it off. Then I see the guys who think they need to show off every muscle in their body and have close to no actual muscle.

Or simply people on any online game with the name “alpha”

If you are alpha you don’t need to show it off like its a big deal.

13. It can be hard to tell the difference.

I went on a few dates with a guy like this. Constantly puts me down if I have different opinions and expect people to pick the path he believes is the best and agree with his choice even if it’s their lives.

Sometimes low self esteem can be really similar to arrogance.

12. The proof is in the pudding.

I remember reading a book called HOW TO BE AN ALPHA MALE unironically…

Some good advice here and there but I pretty much remember why I bought it, I was insecure as f*ck.

11. Not just probably.

Putting nuts on their trucks probably.

I want to hear the mental discussion they have with themselves before they make that purchase.

10. I mean truly.

The overzealous gym bro. The absolute worst.

It’s the guy at the gym busting his ass like a machine with his head down that’s really impressive. He means business.

9. Calling yourself out.

Whenever he insults himself a lot, doesn’t like to be complimented, when he acts very negative,

These are some of the things that I do when I’m insecure.

8. A narrow mind.

His view on what makes a man a man is narrow.

In his mind, there are only 2-3 types of men and other types are wrong.

7. You gotta love yourself.

Whenever the dude constantly asks for validation from other people.

Honestly, if someone wants validation, that’s okay, everybody needs it. I think it’s healthy to be upfront about wanting it and asking for it from people you trust.

Needing it constantly and / or trying to goad it out of people with weird games is not.

6. Bullies beget bullies.

When i was in the army we would definitely see people who were bullied in high school and decided to be “billy badass” and join the military then they would be teased and hazed a little as privates.

But as soon as they got their own little team and a taste of power they would be the ones that made everyone’s lives much more miserable than they needed to be reveling in being the tormenter.

5. Those hashtags are a dead giveaway.

The worst are guys who use hashtags on instagram like #realman, #realmen, #realmenhavebeards, #manly, #man, #men, #alphamale, #intelligent, #smart, etc.

I’m like dude, I’ve never seen a confident masculine man ever once use sh%t like that. If you have to tell the world you’re a “real man”, or how “intelligent” or “alpha”, you are… you aren’t. hahaha

4. A short list.

1. Constant need to be in a relationship or have a “girlfriend” no matter how he feels about her.

2. Guys who talk crap about women who speak up or needlessly call them names

3. Guys who are uncomfortable being CLOSE emotionally or physically around other men in fear of being gay or emasculated.

Also just trust your gut around people. Everyone has insecurities but there’s a fine line as to when it’s a part of people verses when people are a part of them.

3. Nothing girly, please.

Definitely show offs. If you are easily insulted by things tied to lack of masculinity(secretly liking pink for example) then you have fragile masculinity.

Normally the truly masculine people are those that a true people. They don’t need reassurance, they show emotion and the idea of girly colours, smells etc do not exist.

2. I think we’re done here.

I disagreed with a guy on a political issue, and he immediately called me a beta. So…yeah pretty clear cut there.

1. Fighting, period.

Worrying about face and honour and fighting over it.

I’ve never been in s fight. 99% of my friends have never been in a fight. None of my colleagues have ever been in a fight.

Yet… you come across these f**kwits who seem to think that it’s normal. Quite often they complain about it. “Aw I can barely leave my house without someone starting shit”.

In every single scenario, it is them who is the problem.

I agree with these assessments. Co-sign.

Drop your own tips for weeding out the insecure in the comments!