There’s that old saying “there’s no such thing as a stupid question,” but I think we all know at this point that’s not true. There are definitely dumb questions, but that doesn’t stop people from asking them.
The worst ones, as least as far as I can tell, are the dumb questions that are posed with perfect sincerity.
Like these 16, which were dead serious but almost too silly to answer with a straight face.
16. Oh my goodness stop.
“How do they know there is gas under gas stations?”
15. That’s not how this works, actually.
I’m an identical twin. When I was in primary school a classmate asked if I ever forget which one I am.
14. Very common, she said.
When waitressing a patio shift people would stand, literally on the other side of the fence, debating whether to eat inside or outside.
It was very common for them to ask “what’s the weather like on the patio today?”
As if they weren’t currently standing..in the outside weather.
13. Yes. It’s an island.
Not me but I live in Hawaii and someone I know said a tourist once asked him if the water went all the way around the island.
Another friend said a tourist asked if they could just swim under the island (snorkel, actually, not even SCUBA) to get to the other side.
My husband’s cousin once said she wanted to get her dad’s RV and drive from California to Hawaii to see us.
12. Nah, they just hop around with the kangaroos.
I’m Australian, when I lived in the US I was asked if we have roads.
11. Water can be confusing, I guess.
I used to be a hotel manager at a place right off Lake Superior and was asked more than a few times what the quickest way down to the ocean was, if they’d be able to see dolphins, or where the salt water started.
Most people just don’t understand water it seems.
10. Why, how do you think it goes?
How do you pronounce your last name? *Are you sure?
I get this ALL THE TIME.
I guess it makes sense though, I can’t expect everyone to know Polish last names.
9. Can he count to one?
I once told someone that I could count the number of women I’d been with on one finger. After a long moment of silence that I mistook for comprehension, he asked “so how many?”
EDIT: To give a better idea what we’re dealing with, this guy, at 20 yrs old, made serious inquiries into getting his healthy teeth pulled and replaced with dentures because he was tired of having to brush & floss.
8. Read some history!
“Does it snow in Russia?”
“Of course not! Russia is a tropical country.”
7. Sir, we ARE speaking English.
If I spoke English… while we were having a conversation fluently in English. I just said no, and they said “oh I’m sorry to bother you” and then just walked away.
Still baffles me to this day.
6. A communication barrier.
I am blind. I was staying over at my cousins house once, and one of them asked me, do you know sign language? I said, I am Blind not deaf.
They responded, I know that you could talk to deaf people that way. I said, yes, I can talk to them but I wouldn’t know what they are saying.
5. Do they know where the pee comes out of?
I work at a veterinary clinic and the number of times people have asked me if their male pets will still be able to urinate after being castrated is staggering.
For those who don’t know, castration involves removing the testicles, not the penis, so yes, male pets can still urinate!
4. There might be a fake one around somewhere.
“Can I get a room with an ocean view”
No ma’am you cannot get an ocean view staying at a hotel in Las Vegas.
Not so much a stupid question so much as a stupid follow up to my answer but some lady at work asked me where we keep the plant milks.
I told her next to the regular milk and pointed in the direction and she replied back “I don’t want MILK” like I was the dumba$$.
I had a brain fart once when I was a teen and asked someone if they had ever died.
Reminds me of The Ballad of Buster Scruggs when they are on the gallows and James Franco smiles at the guy next to him and politely asks, “First time?”
1. Dream land, I guess.
So, as a sperm donor, I can not f**k married women?
A friend of me and husband who apparently thought that if you get a registered sperm donor you will get calls from willing women to f**k them to get pregnant.
Y’all, I don’t even know how I would have responded to these.
How about you? What dumb questions has been lobbed your direction? Tell us about it in the comments!