18 People Muse on What Will Become the Modern Equivalent of Pirates – Terrifying Now, Fun Later

As someone who has studied a good amount of history, the transformation pirates have undergone in the past 400 years always stuns and amuses me. When they were common on the high seas, people feared them, and rightfully so – they were killers, men (and some women) who lived outside societies rules and niceties, who stole and murdered and toasted each other for it after they were done.

Also, they smelled horrible.

Now, though, people look back at the “golden age” of piracy with something like nostalgia for these swashbucklers who flouted societies rules and took what they wanted. They’ve even gotten the Disney treatment more than once!

It’s strange to think about, but here are 20 things from society today that people think might get the same, hindsight treatment in the future.

20. I can see it.

Assassins Creed: Jihad.

19. Will we ever see the day?

“Next on ABC sports, it’s the Tennessee Terrorists vs the Indianapolis Insurgents!”

18. Narcos have it all.

Also they have such an over the top style, it’s inevitable.

Patterned shirts, bulletproof vests. Ak-47, huge belt buckles, cowboy boots, shaved heads, funny moustaches.

And lion / tiger pets…

17. Toy witches, toy Native Americans…not a new idea.


Just imagine the irony of western kids playing with ISIS figurines.

16. They were also not-nice people.

It’s already true of prohibition era gangsters.

15. Because he’s a vampire.

I would say Putin but he’ll probably still be running Russia.

14. I think this is true.

Pretty much any criminal archetype that can be easily twisted to “sticking it to the man” will be inevitably romanticised.

It’s the Robin Hood effect.

13. Or people who leave their dog’s poo for others to find.

Considering we’ve been through the same thing with assassins (like the Hashashiyyin), poachers (like Robin Hood), Old West outlaws, mobsters, hackers, graffiti artists and parkour hooligans, I’m betting…

People who sneak dogs into petless apartments.

12. He still terrifies me.

Narcos, we don’t even need a century to know that, just how people idealizes the figure of Pablo Escobar and others infamous narcos in Latin America.

11. …what?

Japan and its army of mobile suits like the prototype they have already made to flip every country off.

10. You never can guess.

Bloods and Crips type gangbangers, motor bike gangs, hell in 500 years the memory of people like the nazis, bolsheviks, and Al Qaeda will be such distant memories people might like them.

People dress up as Vikings for Halloween. Atilla Th Hun was a good guy in Night At The Museum

9. You gotta have the eyepatch.

Cryptocurrency theft, but still wearing an eye patch.

8. We’ve even got a theme song.

“Oooohhhh! Who lives in da hood and hustles to g’s?”

7. Nope. Don’t like that.

In 400 years cancer will be so cured that ever being seriously ill with it will be forgotten too. Then it’ll be inaccurately represented in historical stories whenever an illness is needed…

A: are you coming out tonight?

B: no sorry I’ve got cancer

A: ok! Well catch you tomorrow!

B: lol ok!

6. Definitely strange to think about, right?

2003: Pirates of the Caribbean: the Curse of the Black Pearl

2203: Terrorists of the USA: the Curse of Jetblue Airlines

5. That’s when Pennywise will return.


In a couple of centuries we’ll have lost our fear of them and they’ll be seen as something light-hearted and slightly wacky with their impractical footwear and whatnot.

4. We don’t think they’re very romantic. Yet.

Pirates are still scary as fudge tbqh.

They just look a lot different (somalians on rubber boats with ak47s and rpgs rather than blackbeard).

3. We all know who the heroes will be.

ICE and Immigrants. Instead of cowboys and Indians.

2. Modern day pirates, for sure.


1. A good, if unsettling, comparison.


“Awww look at little Jimmy, he looks so cute in his Bin Laden costume.”

I think this is such an interesting question!

Is there something you would add to this list? Tell us what it is in the comments!