Have you ever sat and thought about how an alien invasion might go down? Would they just blow us up? Would we all become mindless slaves? Would we have to fight back like in the big disaster movies?
What if they demanded to talk to a representative from the human race?
Sadly, I think we would just end up sending some kind of politician – though there would surely be a fight over who would get to go from around the world – but what if we could chose anyone?
These 18 people have some thoughts on who would be the very best human to send.
18. They will be powerless.
The voice alone will get them.
17. A happy meatball.
Jacob, my friend’s stepdad.
He’s built like a happy meatball, and can chat you up for 10 minutes while you’re laughing for the entire conversation.
I think people forget that just because someone is well known by the people doesn’t make them a guaranteed person to do something for the world.
16. Uncomfortable silence.
And no I don’t mean Rowan Atkinson, I mean Mr Bean.
Lot of uncomfortable silence at that meeting.
15. For self motivation.
Myself. Not because I’m self centered, I just figured it was time I got off my ass and did something.
So yeah if they come just hit me up and I’ll be there.
14. Turn him in.
Mark Zuckerberg! They lick their eyeball, he licks his eyeball.
He’s with them, so we turn him in.
13. A really pleasant person.
My neighbour anne.
She’s just a really pleasant person
Anne you poetic, noble land-mermaid.
12. They won’t be able to resist.
I know you wanted a person but I choose a golden retriever
The rules don’t say a golden retriever can’t play basketball.
I mean football.
I mean be humanity’s diplomat to the stars.
11. A normal person.
Honestly I would 100% vote for a normal person other than a celebrity.
Like yeah lots of these responses are celebrities people generally accept as super nice.
But they’re still celebrities and far removed from what the average person experiences on this planet.
10. Over the top.
Mr. Rogers. Just lock them in a room and show them videos of him
What if he was an alien? He was over the top nice and truly remarkable. Maybe you just locked them in a room and showed them a video of their great uncle.
9. He knows everyone.
My hospital’s chief of neurosurgery. He knows EVERYONE. Orderlies, EVS, nutrition, all of the nurses and the techs. He’s never too busy to say hi to anyone. Call me “my first name”.
He knows all of his patients, their families, tells them to call him anytime. Amazingly skilled surgeon and doctor. He will go to funerals. And he’s a fucking genius; started a brain tumor repository to share information all around the world and try to help people.
He would be out best human representation.
8. An amazing person.
Not that she would accept, but Dolly Parton.
She has always displayed the best balance of entertaining, cleverness, motivation, selflessness and political awareness that I’ve seen across the board.
Is it weird that I really love her but I just can’t get into her music? She is am amazing person that’s for true.
7. He’s ready to serve.
Since they came to me, I’d just say that it’s me.
I’d say “hey there. What brings you to our planet? We may need a helping hand in a few areas. Would you be willing to help?”
If an intelligence that can travel the galaxy but we haven’t even been able to detect yet, if they’re bent on harming or subjugating us, we’re not going to be able to stop them, let’s keep it real.
6. Bridging the gap.
Weird Al Yankovic, because if anyone can bridge the gap between humans and aliens it’s him.
5. They would love it.
Patrick Stewart – i mean he probably still has the uniform.
And the aliens be like “omg they sent Picard”
4. Small bags of oregano.
The guy around the corner from my house. Guy is always in his front yard chatting up any people that come by, everyone always leaves his house with small bags of oregano too!
3. Never met a stranger.
She never met a stranger and anyone who entered her home left with a full belly, a lipstick kiss on the cheek/forehead, and leftovers for literal days.
She lived down the road from me in college and would bake pies for all of my professors, make my friends tubs of fried chicken, spaghetti, casseroles of any and all kinds.
She made you feel like a million bucks while kindly and gently letting you know where you were messing up in life. Took no s*%t and gave everyone her all.
Those aliens would have NO idea what to do with themselves.
2. Seems like a no-brainer.
Sigourney Weaver. Duh.
This is why she’s the right choice. She’s all about peaceful domesticity until things get real.
1. He is the doctor.
The Doctor would be able to talk to aliens because he has talked to aliens.
I’m not sure about some of these suggestions, but others are pretty darn interesting picks.
Who would you choose if it was up to you? Let us know in the comments!