25 Funny Married People Who Are Definitely Going To Regret Saying That

Marriage is not for the faint of heart, and like every scenario in life that can be tough to navigate some days, humor can be the key to keeping your cool – and sometimes your sanity.

You have to be careful, though, because sometimes even the best joke can cost you something worse if your partner doesn’t think it’s quite as hilarious as you did.

Which I believe these 25 people can attest to after these (admittedly funny) comments.

25. That’s not a good surprise.

I’m surprised he hasn’t figured that out by now.

24. How dare you touch my things?

And leave them nearby and in plain sight?

23. Depending on how long you’ve been married, yes.

But it probably counts.

22. Now that’s a challenge.

It happens no matter how big or small the kitchen is, too.

21. You’re not allowed to yell at them, though.

And you have to pay them, too.

20. Who eats a single Oreo?

I suspect she may have married a pod person.

19. That’s one way to get rid of him.

*takes notes*

18. They had a tea party.

I mean obviously.

17. Some people can do anything loudly.

It’s a terrible talent.

16. You kind of asked for it.

She took matters into her own hands.

15. That’s the only reason to shave your legs every day.

Time to give up the ghost.

14. Gossiping in general.

And also talking crap about other people’s kids.

13. I mean how dare she?

Nothing better on a hot summer day.

12. I don’t know how you could live like that.

It’s completely untenable.

11. That’s one barometer.

A lack of listening will never let you down.

10. A week’s notice, perhaps.

Hopefully he at least knows the month.


9. Ok this one got me.

I’m still giggling.

8. It’s a hobby.

But only because he can’t make a living that way.

7. Honesty is important.

I mean, who else is gonna tell you the truth?

6. 3pm seems generous.

I suppose it depends on how hot it is.

5. You’d better stay in your lane.

It’s the only way a road trip ends in success.


4. One of these people is always the husband.

And it’s not the one being considerate.

3. Sounds like a drag.

Do you think anyone would notice if you didn’t?

2. You want to have a good cake.

So yeah, you’d better just help.

1. Honey, about that…

He’s in for a rude awakening.

It’s all fun and games until somebody has to sleep on the couch, right?

And I mean, let’s be honest…sometimes the joke is still worth it.