How Can You Tell Someone Wasn’t Raised the Right Way? Here’s What People Said.

Sometimes, you can just tell…

I’m referring to knowing that a person you know with wasn’t raised the right way. It could be a co-worker, someone you dated (or are still with), or maybe a friend.

But there are definitely universal signs that just make it obvious that certain folks weren’t taught the correct life lessons by their parents.

What are those signs?

AskReddit users weighed in on this topic. Let’s see what they had to say.

1. But, back to me…

“Turning conversation back to themselves at all cost.

Being a good listener is a sign of a person raised well.”

2. Playing the victim.

“They always portray themselves as a victim.

Nothing is ever their fault and somebody is always out to get them.”

3. This drives me NUTS.

“They never say please or thank you.”

4. How does this work?

“They don’t know how to do normal household stuff.

I’ve seen people that don’t even know how to make their own coffee or clean a toilet.”

5. This is very important.

“Always pay attention to how someone treats service industry workers, animals, and young children.”

6. Didn’t think about this one.

“They apologize for every little thing.

Probably a sign that they grew up with abusive parents that got mad over anything and everything.”

7. That is rude and gross.

“Who are the guys who spit out their chewing gum into urinals?

I see this all the time at work and I work in a high end corporate place.

Do they think it dissolves and goes down the pipe?

The janitor has to pick that out.”

8. Pretty trashy.

“You give them a lift and they leave rubbish in your car.

This kind of stunned me as a driver for Lyft and Uber.

I’d never dream of leaving my trash in a cab or someone else’s car.”

9. That’s all you need to know.

“How they act as a boss when their employee messes up.

Yelling and belittling shouldn’t be your first option.”

10. Karens.

“Disrespecting people for doing their job.

Karens and male Karens who look down on cleaners, janitors, sanitary workers.

They tell their kids that they’ll end up like “those people” if they don’t succeed into stealing or competing with others or some bulls**t.”

11. Be nice to everyone.

“How they treat people from whom they have nothing to gain.”

12. How many times have you seen this?

“Lack of personal accountability.

They can never admit wrongdoing on their part. It’s always someone else’s fault.”

13. Follow the rules.

“One rule for me one rule for you.

Parents that mess up on the discipline/accountability stage of parenting produce these people.”

14. They don’t like that word.

“The word “no” just means throw a fit and be as obnoxious as you can be until you get your way.

“No” does not mean that rules are rules or someone’s job might be on the line, they’re the important one, not anyone else.”

15. Mind your boundaries, please.

“Not respecting personal boundaries.

If you’re wondering why someone has these sorts of issues, take a look at their parents.”

16. That’s not good.

“They think handling a disagreement means shouting, attacking someone’s character, name-calling or breaking things.”

17. Ugh! Who does that?!?!

“They whistle, snap their fingers, or make that “pspsps” sound to get their server’s attention in a restaurant.”

18. Sounds a little paranoid.

“We know someone that won’t get a checking account/Direct Deposit because “the banks just steal your money”, and he takes his paycheck to a check-cashing/payday loan shop instead.

We also know his mom, who is in her mid-40s and on her 3rd bankruptcy.”

19. This one is huge.

“The way they treat an animal.

If you’re abusive to your pet, I have no sympathy for you. The amount of love that an animal can offer deserves the utmost respect.”

20. Wow…some people…

“If you go to someone’s house, and they cook for you, you eat it with a big smile and lots of thanks, even if it was garbage.

My wife brought her friend over for lunch, I made perogies, she goes “that’s not a meal, that’s a side” and goes to get Quiznos. Blew me away.

Someone’s hospitality is the deepest respect they can show you. You have to give it back. How conscientious you are of that scenario is a good sign on how you were raised.”

21. Drives me nuts.

“If they make messes in public areas and just wander off.

Leaving trash in the theater, not flushing, leaving the cart in a parking space.”

22. Litter bugs.

“Not dealing with their trash.

People go up and down the road leading to my neighborhood (the dump for our half of the city is right next to it) and let their trash fly out.

Makes me wanna find an address in their trash and dump it on their porch.

On a further note, smokers who don’t take care of their waste. My neighbor smokes and if a part of the package falls off he will let it lie. He will let the butts stay there if he does not see a trash can it makes me wanna thrash his throat.”

23. Not being a good guest.

“People who don’t offer to help you clean up when they are visiting you.

Like having friends over and them leaving you with all the beer bottles, bowls and glasses on the table. I don’t mind cleaning up, but I always offer when at someone else house.

You make the mess together.”

24. Not my fault.

“They blame everyone but themselves for their problems and expect everyone but themselves to fix those problems.”


“They listen to music in public without headphones.”

26. Never a good sign.

“You can’t have a conversation with them without them talking s**t about another person.”

27. From a reputable source.

“They’re a loner and socially awkward.

I say this because I was neglected growing up and struggle with socializing.”

28. Keep your eyes peeled.

“I always look out for manipulated tactics, here are a few I shall share with you all that I have seen over the years:

Using people for status, and money.

Backstabbing, will always use your insecurities to benefit or up-lift themselves.

Avoiding all confrontation.

Lying, and avoiding the truth.

Minimize your problems.

These were just a few that I have seen on an ongoing basis, it may be environmental.”

29. All the bad stuff.

“Compulsive lying, compulsive theft, poor hygiene, reckless spending of money.”

30. Total disregard

“Total disregard for other people.

Whether it’s small like leaving a mess for your waiter, or just never considering the other person feelings or perspective.”

31. Amen to this. So trashy.

“They mistake being professional and polite even to people you don’t like as being “fake” and being unnecessarily rude to everyone as being “real”.”

Okay, now we want to hear from all the readers out there.

What do you think are some very obvious signs that someone wasn’t raised the right way?

Talk to us in the comments and let us know what you think. Thank you!