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The Internet Is Obsessed With This 9-Year-Old’s Genius ‘New Yorker’ Cartoon Captions

Photo Credit:Petty Mayo

The Internet has chosen a new favorite comedian— and she’s only nine years old.

Screen and comedy writer Bess Kalb provided the world with a shining beacon of light in the swamp that is Twitter by tweeting out New Yorker cartoons captioned by her cousin’s nine-year-old daughter, Alice.

Kalb’s photos of the quippy one-liners quickly went viral, and once you read them you’ll have no trouble understanding why. “Everything is terrible but my cousin’s 9-year old daughter Alice has been quietly and masterfully slaying the @NewYorker’s caption contest and it’s pure delight,” Kalb wrote.

Photo Credit: Twitter, @bessbell

I know what you’re thinking, but the word “perfect” is actually an under- not an overstatement.

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Photo Credit: Twitter, @bessbell

caption this

Photo Credit: Twitter, @bessbell

new yorker caption

Photo Credit: Twitter, @bessbell

bess kalb

Photo Credit: Twitter, @bessbell

Photo Credit: Twitter, @bessbell

new yorker comic

Photo Credit: Twitter, @bessbell

Photo Credit: Twitter, @bessbell

Photo Credit: Twitter, @bessbell

“(She’s freaking out with joy at your comments – I’m sending the screenshots to her mom),” tweeted Kalb. “Vintage Alice from 2017. I think you’ll like her earlier work. (She asked for a collection of EVERY cartoon with the real captions removed.)”

Photo Credit: Twitter, @bessbell

Photo Credit: Twitter, @bessbell

Photo Credit: Twitter, @bessbell

Photo Credit: Twitter, @bessbell

Photo Credit: Twitter, @bessbell

Photo Credit: Twitter, @bessbell

Photo Credit: Petty Mayo

Naturally, folks went wild for Alice’s brilliant New Yorker captions.

Photo Credit: Twitter, @JenniferMascia

Photo Credit: Twitter, @tylerwatamanuk

Photo Credit: Twitter, @HarleyLaughs

Photo Credit: Twitter, @nathanlechler

Photo Credit: Twitter, @Kel_MoonFace

Photo Credit: Twitter, @akwyeth

Photo Credit: Twitter, @pjohanneson

Kalb wrangled her viral tweet into a larger message and societal call to arms: encourage and support girls to be funny. She mentions how social ‘norms’ for the longest time dictated that girls simply had no right to be funny, citing writers of several popular comedy television shows as examples.

Photo Credit: Twitter, @bessbell

Photo Credit: Twitter, @bessbell

Photo Credit: Twitter, @bessbell

Photo Credit: Twitter, @bessbell

Photo Credit: Twitter, @bessbell

She notes how important it so to remember that young girls have literally everything going against them– sometimes even their own families or teachers. And how boys don’t like to be less funny than girls, leading many to quell their inner humor and comedic prowess.

Photo Credit: Twitter, @bessbell

Photo Credit: Twitter, @bessbell

Photo Credit: Twitter, @bessbell

Photo Credit: Twitter, @bessbell

Photo Credit: Twitter, @bessbell

Amen. While white men make room for women in comedy, we’ll be reading Alice’s forthcoming autobiography: Well, That’s New.

This article was first published by our partners at Petty Mayo

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