Trending Now
Don’t even bother with the dress…
Is that a bad thing to tell someone?
Apparently, the answer is YES, because this woman had to ask the fine folks on Reddit’s “Am I the A**hole?” page if she was wrong for telling someone they didn’t need to wear a dress to her wedding.
Let’s see what’s going on here!
AITA for telling my soon-to-be niece that she doesn’t need to wear a dress to my wedding?
“I (32f) am getting married to my fianc´é (41m) next year. After we got engaged, I suggested it might be nice if I asked my fiancé’s niece (who’s 15) if she wanted to be a bridesmaid too.
I’ve only met her a couple of times, so we’re not close, but she seemed like a cool kid and I thought it might be a nice way for us to bond/ get to know each other/ involve her in the wedding. (Side note – she’s the only niece/ nephew on either side of the family).
Anyway, cut to a few weeks ago and we’re in my fiancé’s hometown to visit his family and discuss wedding-related stuff. His brother, sister-in-law and their daughter came over and I noticed this time that she was dressed a lot more androgynous than I remembered.
The topic moved to wedding dresses and bridesmaid’s dresses and I could see she was immediately uncomfortable. Her parents (her mum really) and grandma were making comments about how she’d need to be more feminine/ brush her hair etc, and how nice it would be to see her like that.
I’ll be honest and say this hit a nerve with me, as I was very much a tomboy as a teenager (even though I’m not anymore) and it absolutely broke me whenever my relatives would say things like that. Eventually, her mother made a comment along the lines of, “It’ll be nice to see you dressed like a girl for once.” and she looked really sad/ embarrassed/ upset.
In response, because that really hit a nerve, I immediately told her that my maid of honour would be wearing a trouser suit for the wedding and not a dress and that I’d given all the bridesmaids the option of wearing anything they want as long as it’s in the “wedding colour”, to make things easier.
I pulled out my phone and started showing her photos of the ideas my friend had sent me (a jumpsuit, culottes, a trouser suit, a tailored tux etc) and let her know that she could pick anything at all she wanted – she could even wear jeans and trainers if that made her comfortable – and that it’s a wedding, not a fashion show.
My niece perked up a bit when I said that but her mum looked really p**sed off. She’s since asked my fiancé to pressure me into getting all the bridesmaids dresses so their daughter will have to wear one (which, lol, no). My husband doesn’t give a s**t what she wears, but obviously also doesn’t want his family and me to be arguing on the wedding day.
I don’t want to back down because I know what it feels like to be pressured into wearing something that makes you uncomfortable, but on the other hand, I know it’s only for a day and it’d make the family happy.
AITA for trying to overrule her parents?”
And here’s what people on Reddit had to say.
This reader said she’s NTA and she should go full BRIDEZILLA.
Photo Credit: Reddit
Another person said she should let people express their individualism.
Photo Credit: Reddit
And this Reddit user said she’s NTA and they had a good idea about what she should do…
Photo Credit: Reddit
What do you think about this story?
Let us know in the comments.
Thanks, friends!
