Do you like to read stories on the “Am I the *sshole?” page on Reddit?
If not, you gotta get on that!
You get to hear all kinds of points-of-view about different kinds of subjects from folks who want feedback about whether they acted like jerks or not.
And here’s another from a mom who didn’t allow her daughter to get a makeover at a party.
Let’s see what happened.
AITA for not allowing my daughter to get a makeover at a birthday party?
“This happened last year.
Because of actions my parents did when I was a kid I do not allow my daughter, Maisie (F5), to play with make-up. When I was a kid my parents f*cked up my self confidence and self worth by convincing me the only way I’d ever find love or success was if I was pretty. At 8 my mom started perming my hair. By 13 I was getting highlights.
By 14 she was having my brows waxed. At 16 she convinced me I needed a nose job or the boys would never like me. Around 15 she was reminding me to wear lipstick and something pretty in case any boys saw me. For years I defined my own worth based on whether or not I was pretty. It took years to repair that damage. I swore I’d never do that to my kids.
Maisie’s classmate “Anna” had her 5th birthday party and Maisie was invited. The party was dance-club themed but there were also activity stations set up as well. Build your own cupcake, make your own crayons, make your own clay sculpture, finger painting, etc, and one of the stations was profession party makeup. Anna’s parents had hired three professional stylists to give the girls fun makeover and do things to their hair like temporary color dye and clip-in extensions for curls and such.
My Maisie, while enjoying toys and clothes from both sections of the store, is mostly a girly-girl and she’s always been curious about makeup. She sees those kid-friendly sets at the store or is sometimes gifted them by relatives and she wants to play with them but I don’t allow it.
When Maisie is a teenager she and I will discuss makeup and how to use it properly and when I believe she’s mature enough to wear it and not let beauty define her I will let her wear it. And, once she’s 18 she can do whatever she wants.
The stylists required parental consent before doing anything so Maisie came and asked me if she could have her makeup done and her hair fixed. I said no and explained why. Maisie took it well and in a moment her favorite song came on and her friends took her away to dance and eventually the matter was forgotten. Maisie enjoyed the party and we went home happy.
But, through the other parents, word got around that I refused to let Maisie get her makeup done and now the other parents are calling me some crazy helicopter mom who is trying to control her kids.
Apparently they think that it was an *sshole move to make Maisie go without a makeover when most of the other girls (it was an all-girl party) had their makeup done.
Now its gotten back to my husband and he said he agrees that Maisie doesn’t need makeup every day but surely I could have let her wear it at the party and washed it off when the party ended. We didn’t fight, but he told me that if he’d been there he’d have thought I was being controlling, too.
Was I an *sshole for not letting Maisie get her makeup done?”
And here’s how folks on Reddit responded.
This person said that the mom who wrote the post is a bit of an *sshole and she needs to let her daughter have a little bit of fun.
This person argued that this mother is letting her own hangups in life interfere with raising her daughter.
Another Reddit user made a good point: this woman is doing the same things that her mother did to her…and that’s not a good thing.
This person agreed that this mom is in the wrong in this situation and her actions will only make her daughter feel left out among her peers.
Finally, this person said that this woman is still dealing with her trauma and it’s affecting the way she’s raising her child.
What do you think?
Should this mom have allowed her kid to get a makeover?
Let us know in the comments. We look forward to hearing from you!