You’d think it would be common sense that food items don’t belong, you know, anyplace inside you other than your stomach. You’d think that, but you would sadly be wrong.
Last year, doctors had to put out a warning that cucumbers shouldn’t go inside your vagina, and this year, they’re having to do the same with parsley – all thanks to Marie Claire (an actual real media publication), which published an article about the herb being useful to bring on your period.
According to the article:
“Parsley can help to soften the cervix and level out hormonal imbalances that could be delaying your cycle, helping your period come faster. …If you’re struggling to find a dish based on parsley, don’t panic – the most effective forms are said to be parsley tea and parsley vaginal inserts.”
Yes, you read that right.
The internet has many suggestions on using parsley to induce a miscarriage herbally, including this horrifying tidbit:
“Fresh parsley (preferably organic…I don’t want pesticides in my vagina, so I go organic). Insert a fresh sprig of parsley as far as possible into the vagina (parsley induces contractions, yum). Change every 12 hours. When soft, it may be difficult to remove, but this is not dangerous.”
In fact, that is so dangerous.
Putting anything that gathers bacteria into your nethers presents a risk of infection, which can have life-threatening consequences.
“There is no evidence of any benefit to a woman of doing this, and clear risk of significant harm as deaths have been reported. I would urge women not to insert anything unless they have taken proper medical advice,” Dr. Shazia Malk told The Independent.
One woman who died after trying to induce a miscarriage with parsley lived in Argentina, where abortion is illegal. She was 34, and even though surgeons removed her uterus in an attempt to stop the spreading infection, she still passed.
Also? Dr. Jennifer Gunter told IFLScience that using parsley to bring on a miscarriage “can’t work. To think it could work would reflect a belief in magic.”
As abortion clinics close all over the country, I imagine that we’re only going to see more people looking for ways to take matters into their own hands.
And I don’t see how that’s going to be good for anyone.