When you’re young, you think you have it all figured out and you CAN’T WAIT to get out from under your parents’ rules. Because it’ll be easy, right?
WRONG. That’s when reality slaps you right in the face.
AskReddit users shared what they were totally unprepared for when they moved out on their own. Ahhhhh, memories…
1. Used to seem like it
“The fact that $100 is no longer a lot of money.”
2. Now I’m bummed out
“Loneliness by far. I loved living by myself, but lying in bed without my cat on my bed, or without hearing my mom laughing downstairs made the room feel very small and secluded.”
3. That is the worst
“The cost of food and how fast it goes bad.”
“You need to actually THINK about what you want to eat each and every day. I still can’t get over it.”
5. Then reality sets in…
“For me it was exhilarating. Want to sit and eat a whole package of double-stuff oreos at one sitting without anyone judging you? It’s on!
Fortunately, it only took a few weeks of that before I realized I was getting fat and felt like shit, so I had to go back to eating real food like my mom cooked when I lived at home.”
“Come back to a dark, liveless home in the evenings.
Since my mom worked 6am 2pm until a few years ago, and we lived with my grandparents, there were always someone home when I’d come back from school.
Even if we didn’t chat, there were someone there, moving around, doing their own things. It sometimes was annoying because I sometimes was tired and needed peace and quite. But I underunstimate how much reassuring it was.”
7. That is depressing
“The amount of depressing things that come in the post: bills etc.”
8. Turning into Mom
“How alike my mom and I are. I used to tell her to chill with the household chores.
She couldn’t chill.
I can’t chill.
9. That’s the worst
“Being on my own if I got sick. I once got food poisoning when my roommate was away for the weekend. Vomiting every 20-30 minutes for an entire day. I was severely dehydrated and didn’t even have the strength to walk to the drug store for meds and Gatorade.”
10. Be happy
“Happy things don’t just happen. You decide to do them.
All those fun events and great memories you had growing up? The birthday parties, beach trips, days you decided to turn the living room into a castle of sheets and cushions?
My parents deliberately planned those things (or gave their own time on a whim) because they wanted me to be happy.
Even if I’m tired from work, I try to plan fun, silly events and always celebrate holidays, because I realized no one’s going to do it for me anymore.
Edit: This comment really seemed to resonate with people! Thanks for the comments and bling. I’m glad this made you happy, or think, or feel seen.
For all those without parents or guardians that made things special for you, I’m sorry. You deserved to have someone who cared.
For those who ask, How do you make special things happen on your own? Or when life is busy, or when you’re poor?, here are some things I’ve done to make my own life nice:
I pick myself wildflower bouquets… or sometimes from people’s shrubs if they’re near the road shhhh
I often take myself to the beach
I like to drive fast with my windows down and good music blaring
I journal a lot
I take myself out to the movies on week nights! I actually prefer to see movies alone. I’m free to emote as I please, and I don’t have to explain anything to anyone.
I strike up a lot of random conversations with people on transit, restaurant waitstaff, folks working at coffee shops, etc. It feels good to make human connections.
I teach. Teaching is one big high for me.
I’m always on the lookout for neat treasures on the ground. Lone earrings, a nice rock, and red autumn leaf.
Get a warm cup some something and hold it in both hands while you walk around on a cold day. Best ever.
I guess these aren’t necessarily holiday-things, but they’re still special, and make my life joyful.”
11. Bare cupboards
“Not having condiments or spices on hand. I took for granted having salt and pepper and whatever spice I needed in the cupboard. Buying all that at once can add up quickly.”
12. All the small things
“The amount of small things that needs to be done on everyday basis: cooking, house cleaning, dish washing, laundry, etc… And this does not include homework (if you are a student), hobbies, personal life… I’m just so tired of all that stuff.”
13. I have to pay for this?
“Water cost money. I grew up on a farm with well water. It completely blew me away people had to pay for tap water. Years later I feel bad for people in cities that dont provide drinkable water.
Our home town had an oil pipe burst and contaminated their drinking water. Many people came to our farm for drinkable water.”
14. And it’s getting worse…
“Food is SO EXPENSIVE. I moved out a few months ago and that’s been the thing I was least equipped to deal with.”
15. I was wrong
“How wrong my idea of “independence” was.
Sure, you can do whatever you want whenever you want. But almost every activity generates waste in some capacity that YOU need to deal with.
Also, if you have a full-time job, having to forego hanging out with friends that don’t. Sorry guys, I can’t hang out until 2 am on Tuesday to play video games anymore. Gotta be up at 6!”