I’ll admit right here and now that I tend to keep things bottled up…sometimes even for years.
I know that’s not a good thing and I’m working on it, but for some reason, I just tend to let things eat away at me for months or even years before I finally talk about it with another person.
And we’re all like that on some level. But some of us are better at letting our feelings know than others…
AskReddit users opened up about what’s been eating them up inside.
1. Tough times.
“I lost my brother to heart disease in May. 2 of my sisters have been diagnosed with cancer this year.
Our other sister has had serious, life threatening health issues for years. So far, I’m the only one who has stayed healthy.
All this worries me because I know it is hard on our 83 year old mother.”
2. Words hurt.
“My friends and I tease each other a lot but lately some of the things we say actually ends up hurting me.
I don’t want to tell them because that’s how we have fun. Who am I to take away from that?”
“I’m 17 and a senior in high school and for the last 5 years I have been struggling with my s*xuality.
It’s a very confusing thing to think about. I am a girl who likes girls and I’ve just recently came to terms about it. But I can’t be who I am, or who I want the be because my parents are so small minded.
I am a Christian who loves God but I also love girls and I don’t think god would condemn me for it. I feel like I’m alone in this journey and I need help.”
4. Toxic relationship.
“My partner and I have been together almost 4 years. We have a condo (rental), a cat, furniture, a life together.
I love him. But this relationship has become so miserable, and so toxic… There’s nothing I can do to make him happy except to leave him alone. I’m basically not “allowed” to get emotional about the state of our relationship or he explodes and storms off. We have had the breakup conversation so many times it seems cliché.
And now it seems like things are finally at the end. He’s got a wealthy family, and if we part ways and move out, he has no worries about what will happen to his life. In fact, he’s convinced it will get better. I on the other hand send money to my mom, have ruined my credit trying to keep this household afloat (with zero recognition for it), and couldn’t get a lease again if my life depended on it.
If the relationship fails, I am next to homeless. I even dropped out of grad school 3 years ago and started working in restaurants to support us when he was unemployed. He’s talked so much sh*t to our mutual friends about me I feel like I don’t even have any anymore.
It feels like my whole life is just falling apart, one step at a time.”
5. Time to have a talk.
“I don’t know how to tell my mom what I want.
I just feel like if I do I will burst out crying and she’ll think something is wrong with me. And I’m scared of what she will think.
I know she already disapproves of me trying to become an actor and well asking for her help I don’t know how she will react. I just want to be a good daughter while having my dream job.”
“I don’t know how to tell my husband how bad things really are with my depression.
I have been showering once a week. I brush my teeth probably twice a week and gargle mouthwash twice a week, I spend most of my days in bed and a tired ALL THE TIME.
I am (trying to) nap more, I just want days to be over so I can just sleep but then I struggle to sleep coz of my RLS and insomnia and I can’t stop thinking out how much I want to change and get p*ssed at myself for wasting another day but then I do the same thing the next day.
I am finding it harder to find joy in the things I usually love and one of them is music. I am not dancing to music as much as I used to, I seem to tune it out more. I am in chronic pain every d*mn day, partly because of a deformity and partly because of my weight. My weight causes more pain on my hips, my knees and my feet. I have plantar fasciitis and heel spurs, I have just recently recovered from a cuboid displacement.
All these issues effect my mobility coz of the absolute pain. I want to lose weight but I have been diagnosed with Obsessive compulsive eating disorder. All I think about is food even though I feel nauseous from the idea of eating or from overeating. I will be eating my lunch and all I can think of is my next meal.
I feel absolutely DISGUSTED in myself and beat myself up pretty much every night. But for some stupid reason my brain doesn’t think about ANY iota of that the next day and I just carry on like every other day. I have done therapy for f*cking years, I have done cognitive behavioral therapy, a few different antidepressants, meditation, hypnotherapy, many diets, shakes, positive affirmations, looked into religion (hey I am desperate), and I am pretty sure there are other things but I just can’t think of them right now.
My next step is a vision board and last week my mum, my brothers and myself have started a weight loss challenge. I’m not doing that well, I have replaced a lot of bad foods with good foods but I am still snacking a lot.
Next week my brother and I are signing up for the gym coz we don’t want to go by ourselves. Anyway sorry to just stop here, I don’t know what else to say.”
7. I can’t…
“Having to cancel anything most of the time (friend meetings, family gatherings, fun, trips, projects at work, life basically) due to flare ups of chronic illness.
It pains me to say “I can’t” tens of times in a row to friends and family. I’m afraid of what awaits for me in the future in terms of my illness.”
8. Had a friend.
“I had a friend once. Let’s call him Bob.
I need this story to have some humor. Me and Bob were inseparable. We were literally best friends. But when we went to middle school, he kept trying to go to the popular kids. The kids who were admired at school. He tried to wear the same clothes as them, fell into the same amines, played the same games, read the same books, and watched the same movies.
But they saw him as a nerd. I stayed with what I liked. Harry Potter, Minecraft, and Marvel. He kept getting rejected. I tried to convince him to stop but he hated me by then. Thought he became a nerd by being with me. I left. Distanced myself from him. Didn’t talk to him. I had other friends. He got depressed. He got hooked on vape, thought it would make the other kids think he was bad*ss. It didn’t.
His grades got sloppy. He got pressured. And one day, he was dead. Jumped off the highest thing he could find, with a rope around his neck. It just keeps bothering me, could I have helped him if I had been there? Could I have saved him?”
“That when a person very close to me died, I could not attend the funeral due to the Covid-19 lockdown.
The guilt of not being able to go does not help with my severe clinical depression”
10. Dirty minded.
“I am 11, and I’m not sure why, but ever since a few years ago, I’ve been extremely dirty minded.
I imagine all sorts of really nasty things, and sometimes I look inappropriate things up. I have been trying so hard to stop and clear my mind of this filth, but I’m struggling.
It’s been devouring me for years now.”
11. Losing my religion.
“This is hard for me to say. My parents are very devotional Hindus. I grew up believing it. I mean, it’s the only religion-like concept that I’ve been introduced to.
But recently, I’ve been having doubts. They’re always at the back of my mind. I read the Mahabharata, (it’s like a bible, but in Hinduism) I read the whole entire thing, and the first thing I thought was that I believed none of it.
The sad thing is that I learn devotional dance too, and I always feel so guilty doing it, knowing that I don’t believe in the stories that I’m representing with my dancing. I don’t want to tell my parents.
Truthfully, my mom and I don’t have the best relationship and religion is something that we connected to. Without it, what would happen? I’m scared, and it feels horrible to have to pretend to believe something you don’t. I just don’t know what to do.”
“I’m feeling really, really sad.
Not a lot enthuses me at the moment and I have a lovely boyfriend, nice house and a new kitten.
I feel guilty for feeling sad and find it difficult to explain to people why, let alone understand it myself.”
Do you have anything that’s been eating you up inside that you want to get off your chest?
If so, please share it with us in the comments.
We’d love to hear from you!