Should A Good Partner Prioritize A Spouse In The Hospital?

There’s no denying that most of us are living pretty busy lives these days. Work, relationships, housekeeping, kids, screaming into the void – it all takes up a lot of our time.

When something catastrophic happens, such as an illness or accident, it can really throw a spotlight on where we spend our time (and how little we have to spare).

This man was in a semi-serious motorcycle accident that’s going to require a short hospital stay.

So I (35M) was in a motorcycle accident earlier this week. My wife (35F) has 3 kids from a previous marriage (17F, 10M, 5M) and we have a 1 year old together.

I had a collapsed lung and had a chest tube put in, a broken leg and arm and torn ligaments in my knee. I’ve been in the hospital since Monday.

His wife was there the first day while he was enduring surgery and getting settled, but as she has 4 kids at home, has had to do a lot of running back and forth.

She came out the day of my accident and stayed until about 4 am. Was back that same morning but has gone home each night.

Then a hurricane was coming, so she had to stay home to deal with preparing the house for that and making sure the kids were safe during the storm.

Yesterday she only stayed until about 1 pm to prepare the house for the hurricane and didn’t come at all today because the weather wasn’t great and she said she didn’t want to leave the kids.

OP is feeling “abandoned” and like he’s not a priority and told his wife as much.

I told her I was upset that I basically went through everything alone. That I would’ve done anything to be with her. She told me she’s been there as much as possible and it’s not fair to dump all the kids on her daughter especially since I’ll need a lot of help when I get home and her daughter will need to help with the kids when she works.

Now he gets the feeling she’s annoyed and wants to know who Reddit thinks is in the wrong, here.

I told her marriage means through thick and thin and I feel abandoned. Now I’m getting one word answers from her.

AITA for feeling like an afterthought?

You know they don’t mind telling him!

The top commenter wonders whether it’s not the painkillers talking, because the thing is, once you have kids you’re never the top priority.

Image Credit: Reddit

This person was a little kinder, acknowledging that it’s fine for OP to feel his feelings right now, but that not being able to accept the bigger picture still makes him a jerk.

Image Credit: Reddit

There is a question of what, exactly, OP was hoping his wife would actually do for him at the hospital day and night.

Image Credit: Reddit

A lot of people popped in to say that life is just hard sometimes, and to encourage OP to suck it up.

Image Credit: Reddit

More than a few commenters had something to say about his riding a motorcycle in the first place.

Image Credit: Reddit

These kinds of posts are far too common, and I assure you that very few of them have been written by women.

If you’re a guy, how would you have reacted in this situation? Tell us in the comments!