Should This Guy Feel Bad For Not Being There When His Wife Needed Him Most?

Anyone who has suffered a miscarriage in their life, no matter how far into a pregnancy or the reason, knows that it’s an incredibly difficult time. It’s a huge loss to the parents but often a loss no one else sees or hears about, which can make it complicated to deal with – which makes the support of a partner to get through it all the more important.

This poor man and his wife found out that she’d had a miscarriage and needed surgery to remove the remaining tissue just hours before they were supposed to board a plane out of the country to see his dying mother.

By the title, it might sound bad. But hear me out.

A few months ago, my wife (29F) and I (31M) found out she was pregnant. Around a month later, we found out my mother was terribly ill and in the hospital in Morocco. We decided to take the airplane to Morocco while the borders were still open.

Five hours before the flight, my wife found out she had a miscarriage.

He had to decide quickly between staying with his wife (which is what she badly wanted) and going to Morocco to see his mother for the last time.

His wife was upset, obviously.

She was rushed to the hospital, but I was now stuck between staying with her and visiting my terribly sick mother. My wife begged me to stay, but I could not since the plane tickets were expensive and there was no guarantee my mother would be alive when she felt better.

When I told her, she started sobbing and refused to talk to me.

OP felt terrible on the flight over and his sister really let him have it, believing also that he had made the wrong choice.

I felt bad the entire flight.

When I arrived and hot picked up by my sister, she asked me where my wife was and I told her the truth, which she started yelling at me, telling me that I’m an a$$hole and she’s a fool for being with someone like me.

His in-laws are also upset with him, but given the fact that his mother passed two days after his arrival and he was only in the country long enough to bury her, he’s having trouble feeling as if he made the wrong choice.

Since arriving back home, his wife has refused to speak to him or acknowledge his own multiple and tough losses.

My brothers think I did the right thing. I’ve received millions of angry messages from my in-laws. My mother died two days after I arrived. A day after the funeral, I went back home.

My wife refuses to talk to me, even though I’ve tried to apologize and explained that I just lost my mother. So, am I the asshole?

Was he wrong? Should he have chosen his wife?

Reddit is reluctant to judge anyone in this impossible situation.

The top comment points out there are no winners here. At all.