Marriage is not the easiest thing people undertake – loving another person, never mind living with them for years on end – can be a challenge even in the best of times. That goes double when spouses don’t agree on their shared living space, or how much privacy is required at home.
This woman has been married for 10 years and lives with her husband and 2 kids. Recently, they’ve all been spending a lot more time together since he’s unemployed and she’s working 5 hours a day from home.
Me F32 and my husband M36 have been married for 10 years, and we have 2 kids. My husband is currently unemployed but I recently started working from home in my office for 5hrs.
Her husband refuses to respect the work time she has set aside and interrupts her for things she believes he could easily handle on his own (or wait until after her work hours).
Thing is my husband would constantly barge in to my office and interrupt my work over simple requests he could get done himself (My work is usually with group and we constantly have group meetings too discuss projects)
Request such as:
- Can you fix this issue in my phone?.
- Can you get the kids ready while I take a shower?/can you watch the oven while I make this phone call?
- complaining about dishwasher/faucet/mixer/computer not working and asking me to stop working to get them fixed.
- he’d send the kids in all the time for me to brush their hair or fix a zipper.
Recently this has escalated, with him embarrassing her in front of her colleagues and boss.
I’ve talked to him about how this has been impacting my work, I already handle the chores when I’m not working so I think 5hrs of work should be respected. He’d apologize and say he didn’t know then do it again and say it was spontaneously.
Two days ago, I had and important meeting and he barged in, interrupted my meeting asking me to fix his tie because he was going out later. It was horrible in front of my colleagues and superiors.
She went and bought a lock, and when he saw that she’d installed it, said how hurt he was and how he didn’t understand how she could just act like they weren’t there all day.
I bought a lock later and installed it, when my husband got home in the evening and saw it he looked absolutely shocked. He asked what was the lock for and I replied that because of him interrupting my work sessions this was my only way.
He sent the kids to their room then argued saying “I can’t believe you wanna act like the kids & I are not even here and lock us out like that” I argued I didn’t appreciate how disrespected my boundaries and thought the lock is the solution after I’ve exhausted all options.
He pitched a fit saying the lock is not a good solution and expressed how hurt he was feeling. He asked “imagine how the kids are going to feel when they see it”. Then went outside to smoke. He kept saying I should remove it.
AITA
She’s wondering if maybe she overreacted, but also didn’t see how there could be another option.
Reddit’s going to weigh in below!
There was this suggestion, that she ask him to pretend she’s in an office away from home, not an office in the home.
Image Credit: Reddit
Plenty of people are wondering if things are going to get worse before they get better.
Image Credit: Reddit
He can either respect her work hours or she can keep the lock.
Image Credit: Reddit
The lock might not do it, sadly.
Image Credit: Reddit
It could be a nice thing, if he would totally get on board.
Image Credit: Reddit
I feel like there have been so many stories like this since the pandemic began, and I really hope people (dudes) start to figure it out soon.
Do you think OP overstepped? Tell us why or why no in the comments!
