12 People Share Examples of Toxic Femininity

Have you ever thought about toxic femininity?

Well, believe it or not, it exists and it needs to be talked about along with toxic masculinity.

So let’s see what folks had to say about this on AskReddit and we’ll see you in the comments.

1. Rude.

“Equating womanhood to motherhood is one of the most obnoxious, unprofessional, discourteous things I’ve ever experienced.

I’m just as “real” for opting out and spending my free time as I see fi. My after-hours obligations are no less valid because it’s not as difficult as you have it.”

2. Pretty women.

“H**ing on pretty women or assuming they’re dumb just because they’re pretty.

I’m a woman too and I see this happen. It’s super sad because all it shows is how you wish you were that good looking.

My pretty friends are super nice, smart girls and I never tolerate the snarky comments that some newcomers make about them.”

3. All in the family.

“To be a good mother, the mom needs to sacrifice her needs for the family. I grew up in a house like this.

And it led to some really dark self esteem issues for my sisters. Moms need her self love time.”

4. Yeah, that’s weird.

“Telling their friends every little detail about them and their SO’s s** life but expecting their SO not to reveal anything about their s** life.”

5. The worst.

“”You don’t deserve me at my best if you can’t handle me at my worst.”


6. Not good enough.

“Not being feminist enough for some feminists.

I have a friend who has VERY hard opinions and came into my home for a friendly Christmas gathering last year and prattled on about “stupid white boys” (we are ALL WHITE. including my husband and two other men who were present who are all loving, supportive, evolved gentlemen)

I made the mistake of saying that I LOVE performing the “traditional” gender role tasks of cooking and homemaking and decorating and cleaning, even though I have a full time job.

My husband and I both make good money and similar salaries.

He takes care of me and sacrifices for me in every possible moment.

She went ballistic and told me I was setting feminism back. I told her feminism means I GET TO CHOOSE WHAT I ENJOY IN A ROMANTIC DYNAMIC.

I really can’t stand it.”

7. Body shaming.

“REAL women have curves.

B**ch, I’m real. Just naturally thin.

If you want to be accepted for your body type so should anyone else.”

8. Awful.

“Using the fact that they can get pregnant in a manipulative way. I mean I know a lot of women who got pregnant where they guy didn’t want to have kids with them.

They lied, and said that they take birth control, when in fact they did not. They got pregnant, and the guy left them. It’s not cool to force someone to become a parent. It’s really unfair to bring a kid to this world with the sole purpose of trying to keep a guy around.

I can’t imagine the kind of mindset to actually do something like this and still sleep at night. I had a coworker like this and she was miserable with the single mom life, and jealous that I don’t have kids. Wtf?”

9. Passive-aggressive.

“Passive aggressive questioning.

We both know you’re asking a question because you either want to start an argument or are trying to bully someone into doing what you want without “sounding” like you are being bossy and can easily play the victim when called out.

Cut it out – the tactic is outdated infuriating and makes you look foolish.”

10. No, thanks.

““Oh, trust me, girl. You’ll want kids one day. Just give it time. You’ll see.”

F**k no, thanks. I’m over 30, stop treating me like I’m a kid who doesn’t know who she is or what she wants.

Women are so much worse at this.”

11. Gender roles.

“Fighting for gender equality but only nitpicking the convenient aspects of gender roles.

As an example, still expecting men to initiate interactions. What’s annoying is that initiating would benefit women as well.”

12. Not for everyone.

“All that girl-boss or lean-in s**t.

Like if a woman is career focused and takes pride in her work, I get that, but climbing the ladder doesn’t make you an inherently good person just because other people of your gender previously weren’t allowed to do that.

Most dudes who obsess over trying to get a ahead are f**king a**holes and so are women who do the same thing. Bosses suck almost universally. If you’re so obsessed with status, just f**king own it.

You don’t get to be a k**ler in the boardroom and also claim some weird folk hero status. You’re just as empty and sociopathic as the men doing that, only you’re more annoying because you demand we cheer you on for it.”

And now we want to hear from you.

Tell us what you think about this in the comments!

Thanks a lot!