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It’s the little things, people.
I’m specifically referring to the little things that people do that tip you off that they’re a good person.
Like holding the door open for people, giving up your seat on public transportation, not screwing people over whatever the situation is, those kinds of things.
How can you tell if someone is a good person?
Here’s what AskReddit users said.
1. Quite a story.
“I had a maths teacher who used to bust my chops. He was fun, but also very temperamental. He’d be silly to a point, then tell you off when you out-sillied his silliness.
I was sat opposite a quiet girl who suddenly looked really distressed. She said something to him in a whisper, and he looked down to a puddle on the floor. She’d wet herself. This was when we were 11-12, so it was quite a big deal.
I clocked this at the same time, and he gave me this look like ‘don’t you dare’, He went over to his desk, poured himself a water, then came back and was pretending to peer at her work, before stumbling and dropping it on her.
He apologised and made a big scene and told her she could go and get a spare uniform from the office as it was his mistake.
I really respected that, I think it showed a lot about his character and care.”
2. Only good things.
“They are given a chance to quietly talk bad about someone, but instead, says something good.”
3. Strict, but fair.
“Had a teacher growing up that was came across as very strict and standoffish, gave off this air of “learn the material or fail.”
In reality though, he would answer any questions you had, even if it was being repeated, was incredibly patient, and would stay as late as he needed to in order to make sure the students understood the material.
If a majority of the class bombed a test he would address it with the class to understand what went wrong, and would redo the material if needed.”
4. Turn it around.
“When folks are piling on jokes on someone that they don’t know very well and the person quietly raises a point of kindness or empathy.
It’s so easy to be mean spirited, especially in group settings.
It’s harder to be kind in those situations.”
5. The right kind of jokes.
“Guy I used to work with was such a class clown, always cracking jokes. Everybody liked him because he was so funny.
It was a while before I realized that his jokes were never at anybody’s expense. He was kind. There was never anything mean in anything he ever said, to anybody’s face or behind their back.
Anyway we’re married now.”
6. I like this one.
“When you’re in a group and that one person keeps trying to say something or add to the conversation but they keep getting talked over.
Then that other person will look at them and say, “Sorry person, I didn’t catch what you were trying to say, can you repeat it?” and makes space for the person being ignored unintentionally.
That’s a real gem.”
7. Shame on you.
“Admonishes people for being rude to wait staff.
I was at a family dinner at a pub/restaurant years ago, and my sister was very rude to the waiter because her steak was overcooked or something, really went hard on him.
My brother’s new girlfriend, who always seemed a shy and quiet person, told my sister to basically stop being a b**ch and that the waiters didn’t cook the food, and you’re embarrassing all of us, everyone’s looking at us etc.”
8. Imagine that.
“When you are having an argument and they actually listen to your point instead of just getting ready to make theirs.”
9. A rough exterior.
“I waited tables at a pretty popular Mexican restaurant when I was in college. There was this one manager, her name was Rosie, and she never smiled. She always looked like she was pi**ed off at everyone and everything.
The entire waitstaff and bus staff feared her. When she walked into the kitchen and wanted something, the line would immediately jump to her demands. It was rumored that she was the person to fire any employee when an employee was fired.
The only people that didn’t seem to be scared of her were the hostesses. They were always talking to her like she was just any other manager or person in the restaurant.
She scared the hell out of me for the first year I worked there. I made sure that she never had anything to be upset at with me. One day, I came into work sick as f**k and having just a really bad day.
She took me to the side and talked to me for a good half hour. Just asking quesitons about my day and how school was going. Towards the end of the conversation she said I didn’t look good and that if I wanted to , I could take the night off.
Rosie was the best f**king person I ever met inside the restaurant industry. From that day on it was my goal to make her laugh. I never did make her laugh. But I got a smile out of her quite a bit after that. She was not just a good person, she was one of the best. But man, you wouldn’t know it unless you really took the time to look.
She was one of those types of people you know had had a hard time in life and put up a rough exterior. But deep down she was a softie and loving grandmother type. I hope she’s happy in her retirement.”
10. Helping out.
“When someone is actually in trouble/needs help, they will help out, even if it’s really subtle or disguised as something else.
For instance, there was a kid in my school who had a reputation for not caring about others, doing whatever he wanted, and tried to convince everyone that he pretty much had “no emotions”. I think he thought it made him seem more tough and hardcore, and although he didn’t necessarily do anything bad to anyone, he tried not to seem kind either.
Once, one of my friends at school had some sort of emergency where she needed (I think) $30. Most people in class either didn’t have $30 (which was quite a bit for a kid to bring to school) to loan her, or they just didn’t want to give it to her, thinking they would never get it back, and she was panicking.
The teachers couldn’t help her for some sort of legal reason (I think she wanted to take a Taxi to the hospital because something had happened to a family member but was slightly underage, and the teachers had to pretend that they had no idea she was doing this).
So, this kid with the “reputation” collected money from all of his friends (since he didn’t have the money himself), under the pretense of another reason – I think it was something like movie tickets or something for that evening. Then, he privately gave it to her, but told her not to tell anyone it was him (I was close friends with her and was actually standing right next to her when he approached us and told us this).
She managed to get to the hospital on time, while he paid for the tickets or whatever with his own money once he got home. When she later offered to pay him back, he refused, insisting that he didn’t do anything (I think he knew that her family would struggle to pay that back, they were having some financial trouble).
I guess it’s not extremely subtle in my case since I was standing RIGHT THERE, but that was the first time I began realizing how some people pretended to not be a good person when they actually were.”
11. Good stuff.
“People who make excuses to do good deeds.
Picking you up from the airport? “Oh, it was on my way.”
Buying you a beer? “I accidentally ordered two.”
Helping you move? “I need the work out! Now I don’t have to go to the gym later!”
Volunteering at an event? “I had nothing else going on tonight, I’m just here ’cause my buddy asked me to.”
Anyone who does a favor for you and then acts like you’re doing them a favor, or brushes the favor off as nothing, is a person who is doing the good deed for the sake of it and not for the praise or clout they receive.
These are the best kinds of people.”
12. Be discreet.
“Discretion.
I see it is a sign of empathy (most of times, at least). They anticipate that openness may be undesirable for you and so they remain discreet in order to make you more comfortable.
Be it regarding some information you shared with them or when helping you out with something (“no questions asked”).”
How can you tell if someone is a good person?
Talk to us in the comments and let us know.
Thanks a lot!
